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Thread: Just got dumped by my girlfriend. Need advice please

  1. #1
    shypshnius
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    Just got dumped by my girlfriend. Need advice please

    Good evening,

    I was just dumped by my girlfriend and i'm currently really confused. I think the main reason why she broke up with me was cause i acted really clingy, super needy and annoyed her during the last week when she went to another city to meet her friends and have a good time. She was already acting quite cold the week before so i panicked a bit and kept messaging, calling her a lot during the days she was away. I could see that she was annoyed with that but i just wanted to understand what was wrong. I could clearly smell that something is not right and had a feeling that she is thinking about breaking up with me. I know it was a big mistake on my part not giving her space during that week. So when she came back, she told me that she needs couple days of space to decide whether she wants to be with me anymore. I've just called her today, and hung up on me, then we chatted a little bit and it turned out that she decided to break up.

    But my main concern is, what she wrote me was:

    "I don't know if i'm doing the right thing. I hope i'm not making a mistake.

    I'm not quite sure what that means.. Do you think she still has some feelings for me? She's acting really cold though and doesn't seem to be interested in me anymore. However, he's still checking every single thing i put on instagram/facebook. We been together for 6 months and it seemed that we really loved each. She even cried in front of me at least 3 times, she used to be really comfortable next to me. It was a long distance relationship though. We used to meet twice a week. It's just hard to believe for me that like 10 days ago she said she really loved me and now she decided to break up with me after i was really clingy, needy the week she was away.

    What is your opinion? Mainly about that thing she said to me today: ""I don't know if i'm doing the right thing. I hope i'm not making a mistake.".

    Thank you.

  2. #2
    rosephase
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    At six months in you two are -just- getting to know each other. It turns out that she isn't that crazy for the person you turned out to be.

    I think you can take: "I don't know if i'm doing the right thing. I hope i'm not making a mistake.".
    As: "I hope this doesn't end with me feeling lonely"

  3. #3
    Elavohra
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    Dude, this neediness and desperation comes when we sense something fishy about to happen. When the other person isn't releasing good vibes. There are not a single thing which can't be sit and talked about and can't be worked out. People can sit and talk and try to understand why the other partner all of a sudden becoming desperate or clingy.
    Since I even have been dumped because of almost the same reason.
    I would now suggest you to give her, her blo*dy space. Just go on NC now, like from right now. Work on yourself. Enhance your knowledge, meet new smart people, set a routine because since you're going to stop talking to her you'll definitely miss her but you'll miss the routine more. So get into yourself only and only yourself. Workout, eat healthy, work on your weak areas, do proper grooming, meet people and try to understand what's happening in and around the world.
    Rest leave it to her, if she'll come back means she has understood your worth and if she doesn't she is the one who has lost you.
    But don't look back, you must keep improving and progressing otherwise you'll not regret losing her, but you'll regret the career progress.
    Last edited by Elavohra; 11-07-2017 at 03:16 PM.

  4. #4
    shypshnius
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    I will be doing the no contact thing from now on. I've just thanked her for the good times, said i love her a lot and that i'm leaving the door open, she can call my anytime if she changes her mind. Do you think it was appropriate to say?

  5. #5
    Elavohra
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    Quote Originally Posted by shypshnius [Register to see the link]
    I will be doing the no contact thing from now on. I've just thanked her for the good times, said i love her a lot and that i'm leaving the door open, she can call my anytime if she changes her mind. Do you think it was appropriate to say?
    You shouldn't have said that as well. But since you've said that already now let her die. Don't give a single damn now. And please don't keep any hopes alive. Just keep moving forward and forward

  6. #6
    SweetGirl28
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    Quote Originally Posted by shypshnius [Register to see the link]
    I will be doing the no contact thing from now on. I've just thanked her for the good times, said i love her a lot and that i'm leaving the door open, she can call my anytime if she changes her mind. Do you think it was appropriate to say?

    Nooooooo!!! She already held the power because she broke up with you, and you just gave her more.
    Thanking her for the good times would have been enough to leave it on a good note.

    Don't try contacting her anymore after this. She knows how you feel and where you are.

  7. #7
    shypshnius
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    Quote Originally Posted by SweetGirl28 [Register to see the link]
    Nooooooo!!! She already held the power because she broke up with you, and you just gave her more.
    Thanking her for the good times would have been enough to leave it on a good note.

    Don't try contacting her anymore after this. She knows how you feel and where you are.
    I know, i won't be contacting her anymore unless she messages me first. It's just that i feel deep down that she still has some feelings for me.

  8. #8
    SweetGirl28
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    Quote Originally Posted by shypshnius [Register to see the link]
    I know, i won't be contacting her anymore unless she messages me first. It's just that i feel deep down that she still has some feelings for me.
    Aww, I just wanna slap you with a wet noodle!
    She will be back if she does. In the meantime, go on with life.
    She's out living hers without you.

  9. #9
    Elavohra
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    Quote Originally Posted by shypshnius [Register to see the link]
    I know, i won't be contacting her anymore unless she messages me first. It's just that i feel deep down that she still has some feelings for me.
    But does it matter anymore? Despite having feelings for you she's decided to quit. Come on dude, have some self respect. Accept what she has done and now let her go. You need to save your peace of my mind. Now you need to protect yourself. Good things are always tough to deal with.

  10. #10
    Elavohra
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    Quote Originally Posted by SweetGirl28 [Register to see the link]
    Aww, I just wanna slap you with a wet noodle!
    She will be back if she does. In the meantime, go on with life.
    She's out living hers without you.
    Yes! I totally agree with you, SweetGirl28.

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