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feelings really hurt


hissingnatural

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I found out my boyfriends been watching porn... now I know this is normal for guys to watch, but it makes me feel extremely insure about myself(We recently had a baby and I feel extremely ugly)I don't understand why he needs to watch porn when I willingly will give him sex whenever he wants. it really hurts my feelings I want to talk to him about it but I'm not sure how to bring it up to him without him getting mad or blowing it off any advice on what I should do?

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First off, stop taking it so personally. His interest in porn has nothing to do with his feelings for you or how much sex you're having. You said yourself you know its "normal," right?

 

As long as it's not adversely affecting your sex life together and/or he's not acting out (cheating) I see nothing wrong with it whatsoever.

 

In my opinion, it's an "escape" from the extremely hectic and stressful lives we live, please don't deny him that, jeez.

 

If you are so insecure about yourself, that's on you, not him. Best to not blame him for what amounts to your own insecurity about yourself.

 

I understand you just had a baby (congrats!), but how about working out and getting in better shape so YOU will feel more attractive?

 

Not for him per se, but for yourself so you won't feel so threatened by it?

 

All my boyfriends watched porn, in fact so do I, we often watched it together! And we had a great sex life together..

 

It can actually be a great bonding experience!

 

Read these forums. You will learn a lot about men and how they think and feel, which can only benefit you and your relationships. There are tons of threads discussing porn.

 

ETA: It's been said that when it comes to porn, there are two types of men.

 

First type admits to watching it, and the second type who watches it but lies about it.

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Has he stopped initiating sex with you? If he hasn't then try not to make his porn/wanking about you. It's not, it's about having the visual stimulation to aid in him getting off... that's all it is and it's about a quick and easy way to scratch an itch.

 

If you are feeling ugly then please start an exercise programme to do when the baby is asleep or if you have the time/money, join a gym if you aren't a member of one now and work on getting your confidence back so that you are happy in your own skin.

 

So: How did you find out he was watching porn?

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