still missing my ex after 6months

I am still missing my ex after 6months of breakup.. I have stopped contacting her, she stopped contacting me too.. I kept myself busy-worked out, spent a lot of time with family and friends, made new friends, went on vacation...

But I couldn’t get her off my mind.. Everything that I do I still want to share it with her, even though she did me wrong n betrayed me..

How do I stop missing and thinking about her?

More time. Six months isn't that long.

Maybe you haven't moved on because you think she owes you something and you are still holding tight to that bitterness. She rebounded with someone else and you found out about it, however I don't know why you think she betrayed you. To me, you're playing the victim card way too much which is detrimental to your healing. Nothing will change if you continue to wallow in your own self pity. Even if you think she did do you wrong, use that to your advantage by turning the pity into a positive, motivating force to forget about her and get your own act together. You're better than that.

I'm the same. 4 years together, apart 6 months and it's like he's already forgotten about me 😞 like he's already moved on. I've tried to pick myself up but I can't seem to do it without thinking about him yet he seems over it already 😞

I am still missing my ex after 6months of breakup.. I have stopped contacting her, she stopped contacting me too.. I kept myself busy-worked out, spent a lot of time with family and friends, made new friends, went on vacation...

But I couldn’t get her off my mind.. Everything that I do I still want to share it with her, even though she did me wrong n betrayed me..

How do I stop missing and thinking about her?

 

Its been 6 months for me as well. I fond its getting harder. I dont know what to do either, but i feel you. This is aweful pain, just saw her hanging out at a mutual friends house. We would almost every friday. They will not speak to me any longer, wish i knew. If i figure it out i will get back to you

I'm close to the 6 months mark myself and I can feel I'm a lot better. I still miss her terribly though, so I really want to believe 6 months isn't that long, but what screws me up is that we only dated for 9 months and 2 months of "talking" and hooking up before that and it's still hitting me hard.

I'm right there with you though...I think I'm doing better than I thought I would be, but I'm not healed yet. I'll just take everyone's word that 6 months isn't that long and it's still normal to feel heartbroken.

"They" say it takes about two years for a couple to heal from an infidelity -- and "they" say also that bereavement takes about two years to ease out. Part of it is getting to that first-year anniversary (of like, everything that was ever notable in the relationship). The other part of it is getting past all that and through the second year.

Kind of like we need to grope blindly through all the hurts of "firsts", and then, having done that successfully, prove that we can keep going and maybe even really thrive in each of the "seconds".

This summer there was a bomb drop that completely screwed me up and set me back. I would have been 6 months in, with the rest of you, if that fool had not felt it imperative to rub my nose in his new life. I am at square one, not even at 90 days, and pissed as hell.

Give yourself a lot of nurturing and grace for the full first year after breakup. The year after that will be easier. Year three is when you know, no question, you're entirely ok.

-- and "they" say also that bereavement takes about two years to ease out. Part of it is getting to that first-year anniversary (of like, everything that was ever notable in the relationship). The other part of it is getting past all that and through the second year.

this is what I'm having trouble with....we only dated for like 6 months. and we broke up in January though he kept doing the breadcrumb bull for another six months. I finally told him off. it's been 4 months since that day. but it was this time last year that we started getting really hot and heavy, lots of big, memorable dates. like October was our paint and sip date and we were starting to get super close, a few weeks later was the "I love you" exchange for the first time. Just this weekend, the "on this day" on Facebook reminded me of our Zoo trip with our kids. and our really big winery date anniversary is coming up, along with his holiday party for work.

I've been pretty busy, just moved, taking 3 classes, job hunting, etc, so I'm good with the whole single status. But then I remember this time last year I had a boyfriend and my lifestyle was so different.

I am still missing my ex after 6months of breakup.. I have stopped contacting her, she stopped contacting me too..

 

How long has it been since you two were last contacting each other?

It helps to start the clock from which time you no longer have contact, not the initial break.

My guess the time of really being apart is much shorter.

It help so gain perspective on things if you look at it differently.

I am still missing my ex after 6months of breakup.. I have stopped contacting her, she stopped contacting me too.. I kept myself busy-worked out, spent a lot of time with family and friends, made new friends, went on vacation...

But I couldn’t get her off my mind.. Everything that I do I still want to share it with her, even though she did me wrong n betrayed me..

How do I stop missing and thinking about her?

 

 

KCTiger pretty much nailed it. Time alone is not enough if you don't use it wisely. It's too easy to ruminate things done, things unsaid. You have to accept your role in what happened and make peace with whatever it was she did to you or you will still be here in a year feeling angry and playing scenarios in your head of what you'd say to her if you met. Closure comes from within.

 

People often read "work on yourself" and they go off and socialise and go to the gym etc, and that's all great. The key thing is to do things that mean something to YOU. And the sense of achievement will make you proud of yourself and that's the biggest healer of all..

Thank you all for your replies and sharing. I do hope those suffering the same situation as me brave through all these. And it is comforting to know that despite all that happened, there’s still family, friends and even strangers around who care.

I am working hard on myself, travelling, doing things previously I couldnt when we were together.. But because we work together I still bump into her once in awhile. It always set me back, always made me sad how things ended up this way. But I think again, she was the one who made this decision, why should I still continue to put myself down? It is not easy forgetting someone/memories regardless of the duration of the relationship.. It hurts thinking about how things were, and it isnt even voluntary the memories just came back.

I believe with time everything will get better, everything will fade.. everything happened for a reason. I hope we all find peace find support and closure in all these.

This may go against some advice on here but get on Tinder or something. One thing that helped me was speaking to other women, even if nothing comes off it you'll get some decent conversations and slowly start to realise there's other people out there, maybe you'll even hit it off with someone!

This may go against some advice on here but get on Tinder or something. One thing that helped me was speaking to other women, even if nothing comes off it you'll get some decent conversations and slowly start to realise there's other people out there, maybe you'll even hit it off with someone!

It doesn't go against advice here. Generally speaking we tend to say to avoid dating because nothing will come off of it while you're still in love with your ex and you'll just end up even more hurt and hurting other people. Getting on tinder to talk with people is fine and even beneficial. If you can get casual sex out of it without feeling guilty, even better.

Just serious dating and jumping into a new relationship is what we try to recommend against.

well yeah u guys are right, talking to new people does help with the distraction. and if something wonderful hits off, why not?

one thing for sure i wouldnt get into a (rebound) relationship to get over her, thats exactly what she did, and i feel that is just against my principle. i may be suffering from it, suffering from my/her actions but i believe i will get out it by myself one day.

but sigh that said, im in the period of NC where i start missing her badly again..

I was with my EX for 2.5 years...

And we have been broken up for almost 12 weeks...

She immediately jumped into a new relationship, but that no longer matters to me... It is what it is...

I still do miss her...

Last year at this time, we were celebrating Thanksgiving together with her family and our kids....

And of course X-mass...

Holidays suck... Especially when you are alone...

I miss the routine texts, calls, and everything else...

But life goes on... And eventually someone will come my way... In mean time, the single pringle life will have to do...haha

well yeah u guys are right, talking to new people does help with the distraction. and if something wonderful hits off, why not?

one thing for sure i wouldnt get into a (rebound) relationship to get over her, thats exactly what she did, and i feel that is just against my principle. i may be suffering from it, suffering from my/her actions but i believe i will get out it by myself one day.

but sigh that said, im in the period of NC where i start missing her badly again..

As a guy we sometimes get bruised egos when broken up with. One of the more productive activities I found to combat this was just talking to women and knowing I was still attractive to others. The emotional beating we give ourselves when we get dumped is easy to fix. We're guys...we aren't complicated human beings. It doesn't take much to refuel our ego. That goes a long way in the healing process.

My ex of 4 years broke up with me 9 months ago, NC since 5 months ago, and I jumped into a new relationship 1 month ago. Being with someone else helps but doesn't take away the thoughts of the ex. The only thing I regret was not initiating NC sooner.

yeah ego is bruised, and it can be nursed with the attention i get from other people.. and yes it is not the same as they are all not her, probably until one day i fall in love with another person. i will continue trying, i believe i will find that person one day.

what i am worried about is, i will never get over the betrayal. i am still so affected by how someone whom i have loved and trusted so much has deceived and broken my trust. i don’t know if i can learn to trust other people again..

I was with my EX for 2.5 years...

And we have been broken up for almost 12 weeks...

She immediately jumped into a new relationship, but that no longer matters to me... It is what it is...

I still do miss her...

Last year at this time, we were celebrating Thanksgiving together with her family and our kids....

And of course X-mass...

Holidays suck... Especially when you are alone...

I miss the routine texts, calls, and everything else...

But life goes on... And eventually someone will come my way... In mean time, the single pringle life will have to do...haha

sigh yes mikey, i am dreading the arrival of the holiday season now

but we are not alone, there are still friends and family around.. it is just that someone who mattered a lot is not by our side anymore

yeah ego is bruised, and it can be nursed with the attention i get from other people.. and yes it is not the same as they are all not her, probably until one day i fall in love with another person. i will continue trying, i believe i will find that person one day.

 

what i am worried about is, i will never get over the betrayal. i am still so affected by how someone whom i have loved and trusted so much has deceived and broken my trust. i don’t know if i can learn to trust other people again..

 

You will don't worry, I thought the exact same thing pretty much up until 2 or 3 weeks ago, suddenly got a lot better.

 

Another thing that helped me besides talking to more girls was ask your family what they really thought. Most parents don't tell you the entire truth when you're with someone so just ask them to point out their flaws you didn't notice, I think I already knew what they pointed out to me when I was with her, but since the breakup and the rose tinted glasses i forgot all the bad

hey guys..

it’s probably been too long since i saw her, i have been dreaming about her and i have been missing her more too nowadays, the urge to break contact is strong too.

i have been talking to another girl, she has been sweet and seems really perfect.. pretty and humorous, we click well.. but the connection is not there yet. i know this is stupid but i feel like i can never find someone like my ex again. the way we connect the way we feel for each other... and i am afraid i may never get over her, and that would be unfair to new people who come into my life..

You will mate don't worry. It comes and goes but whenever you feel crap and miss her just remember how much harder it was at the start, it can take a long time but you'll manage!

You might get a connection with this new girl as well and may one day look back and be thankful you broke up because you met someone who suits you better

You will mate don't worry. It comes and goes but whenever you feel crap and miss her just remember how much harder it was at the start, it can take a long time but you'll manage!

You might get a connection with this new girl as well and may one day look back and be thankful you broke up because you met someone who suits you better

thanks dave.. it was indeed much more difficult in the beginning. i will probably never stop caring about her, i guess i just have to follow the flow and let things be.

The way you are feeling I would definitely suggest not calling her mate....

You need to get to a place where if she says she's engaged and pregnant then it's not gonna send you back down that dark hole....

You're doing the right things*

Carus*

I'm almost four months in and can't imagine being in a much better place by the six month point