At work - Should I try something?

Hi,

 

I have joined a new place of employment approximately 8 months ago.

 

It's a fairly sizeable company, of approximately 600 people just in my branch. And no, office relationships are not frowned upon.

 

There is a woman who joined at the same time as I did. We have had some good conversations, and we seem to enjoy a good chemistry.

 

However, since we work in separate departments, we don't see each other that often. We will wave at each other when we're with our respective departmental colleagues. We will talk when we run into each other, unless we're in a hurry to get to another place. And, recently, she joined me at my table when I was having breakfast in the canteen.

 

I do wonder if I should try and build on this. However, I am very afraid that I might be seeing things that simple are not there, and thereby make a fool of myself. Noone wants a "You thought what?" type of reaction. Furthermore, I don't want to appear that I am stalking her, or come up with any sort of invitation or proposal that might seem creepy.

 

I understand that many people will see this as a simple "make a move" situation. But I have made the wrong moves many times in the past, and I at least don't want to ruin any glimmer of a chance by doing something stupid or - that word again - creepy.

 

So, in essence, my questions are: How do I try and,say, "dip my toes in the water", to see if there is some receptivity? And what kind of invitation would be seen as normal in this situation?

 

Thanks

I understand that many people will see this as a simple "make a move" situation. But I have made the wrong moves many times in the past, and I at least don't want to ruin any glimmer of a chance by doing something stupid or - that word again - creepy.

How about not making "a move" but rather just say to her something like: "We seem to have a lot in common, would you like to go out for a drink with me after work this Friday?"

 

That's if you don't care about any possible awkward, quagmire should you two advance past your first date (should she say yes) but it doesn't work out and you have to see each other at work when it's all said and done.

The whole wisdom of not ****ing where you eat aside, I would never encourage a man, particularly in 2017, to make romantic advances in the workplace, regardless of how mild. Keep it professional, date outside your place of employment. All risk, little reward.

I wouldn't recommend it. I'm mixed up with someone at work right now, and nothing physical has ever happened, but we've become too close as friends. It plays with your mind and makes it hard to work. I'm considering ending the friendship without destroying the working relationship. You don't want to do to yourself what I have allowed to happen. As much as I love the guy, it makes me wish we were working in different places. So, refocus.

It plays with your mind and makes it hard to work.

 

I understand. But I believe this case is different. We work in totally different areas of the company, and only really come across each other in the canteen. It's not as if I would have to see her staring from across the room while sitting at my desk.

I think its all good since you both are in different departments...you have it wayyyy to easy! I actually ended up hooking up with a girl that sat directly beside me and we had the same boss of a small team of like 7 people! She was a bit crazy and was like - "i'm not pretending to hide anything anymore...I'm going to tell our supervisor"

 

So as long as you are not forced to see her in the same room every day....go for it!

 

If you want to play it safe when asking her out somewhere - just ask her and some of her friends to go out for drinks after work...get to know eachother more and then next thing ya know it will just be you guys....

 

In my situation, we all used to go for lunches together....then her and her friend invited me to go for drinks with them....after like a few times we were on the way back home in a taxi and instead of kissing on the cheek I actually slipped and kissed her on the lips totally by accident

 

Anyways....I do regret that and learned to never date someone who sits beside me or is on my team....but other departments are fine...