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Thread: Does closure exist? Or is that even what I want?

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Sep 2017

    Does closure exist? Or is that even what I want?

    This is my first time posting on a forum like this, so thanks in advance for listening lol
    The Coles Notes version: I recently was contacted by an ex boyfriend, which wasn't unusual because he pops up a few times a year (since we broke up 3ish years ago). We chatted cordially for a few weeks until he disappeared. Shortly after, I received a collections letter for an outstanding cell phone bill of his. We broke up because of his inability to pay the bill on time back then. I was devastated that he seemed to have no regard for my credit or our future by not being able to pay a simple $44 a month on time ( I had to consign his account). Fast forward a few years, he must have been making minimum payments because this is the first I've heard of this debt still being active. He ghosted when I sent him a copy of the letter and I ended up tracking him down to confront him face to face.... twice. Both times he told me he would pay it blah blah blah and as of today he continues to dodge me via phone, text and Facebook etc. I really would like to discuss this with him, as I also learned he recently had a baby with someone, and feel a little awkward asking for over $500 from him when he's got a little mouth to feed (if in fact he's contributing). I want to discuss that I will take payments from him if necessary and am also a little curious as to why he kept popping up every year when he had to know this would surface eventually??? I really loved him and to this day am so disappointed that it turned out this way. Do I just let it go??? I'd like the chance to at least air our dirty laundry?
    Oops I guess this was the long version of Coles Notes lol
    Ps. I already paid the bill, as I won't have his mistakes compromising my credit any further.


  2. #2
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2017
    If you're serious about collecting the debt, I'd take him to small claims court. Judge Judy maybe?

    If the debt is an excuse to keep him in your life... Yes, I'd let it go and try to move on. He's having kids with other people and doesn't seem to be very responsible. It sounds like it's best that it ended.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Keyman's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    London, UK
    Closure exists when YOU choose to walk away and forget about it. You have paid the debt, but it is highly possible that this will drag on for more years while you try to get the money from him. Do you think he is likely to pay you? If not, write the debt and him off and never walk down that path again.

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