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Thread: HELP! My spouse is going through a quarter life crisis.

  1. #11
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    No. No separate rooms. He needs to go to an actual counselor - not a FRIEND who is a "life coach" who is likely not a licensed therapist and even if they are - its inappropriate to counsel close friends where your opinions and advice could be tainted based on actually knowing their family, and wanting a particular outcome for them. Him moving to another bedroom will not do your marriage any favors. I do suspect that either this life coach is actually a meddlar in your marriage, OR he has cheated and he feels guilty or wants to have license to cheat

  2. #12
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    Thanks!

    Thank you for your opinion. I have talked to his and my loved ones about this. NO ONE likethis "new friend"
    of his. I am just not sure if getting rid of him is the answer but my spouse seems to very influenced by him and I am not sure who is more at blame. My spouse for listening to this crap or the friend for the manipulation.

    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    No. No separate rooms. He needs to go to an actual counselor - not a FRIEND who is a "life coach" who is likely not a licensed therapist and even if they are - its inappropriate to counsel close friends where your opinions and advice could be tainted based on actually knowing their family, and wanting a particular outcome for them. Him moving to another bedroom will not do your marriage any favors. I do suspect that either this life coach is actually a meddlar in your marriage, OR he has cheated and he feels guilty or wants to have license to cheat

  3. #13
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    Originally Posted by Andrina
    Regressing a relationship versus progressing it is not the way to heal your emotionally disconnected marriage. If he's not willing to attend marriage counseling with you, I wouldn't agree to being roommates. If he was unfulfilled in other parts of his life, he could still work on those areas with the loving presence of a spouse. This is an excuse. He is fading away versus taking the big leap of divorce. He's a coward and isn't being honest with you about what's really going on. I'd engage your power. If your needs aren't being met and he's not willing to make efforts to meet them, he doesn't care and it's up to you to pull the plug. I'm sorry this has happened to you.
    Thank you. It is hard to hear but ultimately you are correct.

  4. #14
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    Originally Posted by CABB
    Thank you for your opinion. I have talked to his and my loved ones about this. NO ONE likethis "new friend"
    of his. I am just not sure if getting rid of him is the answer but my spouse seems to very influenced by him and I am not sure who is more at blame. My spouse for listening to this crap or the friend for the manipulation.
    You should not talk to your "loved ones" about this. It should be between you, and your husband and a professional. That is all. because when you talk to every relative it 1) makes it impossible to move forward if the situation should resolve itself and you go back to having a happy marriage -- the relatives you talked to will mistrust your spouse and not be supportive of your marriage 2) everyone else has their own agenda on what they would like to see happen and its not necessarily what's best for you.

    this is not a quarter life crisis (meaning you are 25 years old??) - this is a cheater

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    You should not talk to your "loved ones" about this. It should be between you, and your husband and a professional. That is all. because when you talk to every relative it 1) makes it impossible to move forward if the situation should resolve itself and you go back to having a happy marriage -- the relatives you talked to will mistrust your spouse and not be supportive of your marriage 2) everyone else has their own agenda on what they would like to see happen and its not necessarily what's best for you.

    this is not a quarter life crisis (meaning you are 25 years old??) - this is a cheater
    I get what you are saying about that but honestly, these loved ones I talked to love him and I and have been a bit more positive about the situation. They also know everything I have posted and our history. But that is why I am reaching out on hear for a more raw and impersonal view. I needed both sides.

  7. #16

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    Hi! I just came across your post. Going thru the same thing with my husband. Same age same situation. Where are you now a year later?

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by Rsalesq
    Hi! I just came across your post. Going thru the same thing with my husband. Same age same situation. Where are you now a year later?
    This person stopped posting over a year ago.

    Other than the "regulars", people often post once or twice and never return.

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