Ex went cold on me suddenly

To start, I'm not perfect. I had my own flaws, mostly I suffered from PTSD and major anxiety. I had anger issues but for the most part my partner kept me calm and happy. Here's the latest:

My ex girlfriend left me in June after a year together. We did so well together. Rarely did we argue. I need to admit my faults first. I mistreated our dog one night, I got upset and hit her a few times and that really made my ex look at me differently. That was about February when that happened. I was Baker Acted in March due to depression. I said suicidal things, suffered a lot from my PTSD and just couldn't take the stress. I got upset with her for having me Baker Acted. I had some underlying anxiety which lead me to have anger outburst, but she stuck with me through it all. She always stood by my side and helped me, even when I lost my job, she still helped me. I wasn't the greatest man of all time, but I dedicated my very life to her. I always paid attention to her, supported her, told her how much I appreciated her and I was helped to contribute to things. She didn't have any problems. I got upset with her for taking edibles home(a previous ex had chosen drugs over our relationship) and I let my judgment get the best of me. Well her grandfather committed suicide in May and that's when she completely changed. She stopped being as attentive and lovable. She didn't like me touching her on some days. A few weeks after that(June 6th) she decided she wasn't happy anymore and that we needed a break. The more the time went on, the further she withdrew from me, stopped talking to me everyday and moved into her own place. It's been over two months now and I'm still doing everything I can to get her back. She came to see me a couple of times and spent some time with me, but about two weeks ago I found out she went on a date. That really broke my heart. Tuesday she called me to say that her father has stage four lung cancer, she was having a difficult time with her grandfather's suicide still as she had a breakdown a few days ago. She said her AC broke and her fridge did, too. We talked and I did my best to cheer her up. She asked me to watch our dog when she goes out of town to visit her dad and I happily agreed. Throughout the week I text her to ask how she has been doing and I even messaged her today, but she still hasn't replied. I can't figure out why she ignores me. It hurts so much to be ignored by her.

Any advice? I can't figure out what to do or why she suddenly dropped me.

Well, first of all, she's depressed herself with with grandpa killing himself and her father having cancer, breaking up with you, and having her own problems. That's probably the reason she's "ignoring you" at the moment.

As for your relationship, you really crossed the line when you hit her. There is no excuse for hitting a woman. And when she committed you, she was afraid you were suicidal, so she did it for you. I can see that she's probably suffering from PTSD from being with you. As for her date, it was probably spent talking about you.

So you've got to give her space. She has to make up her own mind on whether to come back to you or find someone who doesn't have your problems. So try to understand, it's a difficult decision for her.

I never hit her, it was our dog. Either way, it isn't acceptable, but I wanted to clarify that it wasn't her. I never put a hand on her nor did I ever curse her name or belittle her.

Just so it's very clear, I never hit her at all. I'm not sure if I worded it wrong, but I agree that my flaws are not justified. I'm not perfect, I admitted my problems to her before we began dating. I was always open and upfront with her. I didn't hide these issues and I always tried to resolve them.

Animal abuse is usually one of the first signs of other underlying issues, which can be dangerous towards others. I understand you feel remorseful, but maybe it's time to address these issues.

You're absolutely correct. It was out of my character and I have been seeking counseling for it. I recently adopted my own dog, recommended movement by a doctor and it has been wonderful. My ex has seen my improvement and connection with animals. I love our dog and I love mine, but I love my ex more than any words can ever say. I realize my errors in life, trust me, I live with the mistakes of my past every single day. I'm becoming better though. I know it's just words to you, but in my own physical presence I have made drastic improvements. I meditate several times per day, I have been going to counseling weekly, I'm on medication for my underlying issues and I have reconnected with nature.

I'm not perfect, I never claimed to be. I see my flaws and issues. I face it all the time.

She has seen these improvements as well, but she suddenly dropped communication. I understand it's a long shot, but I will do whatever it takes to get her back in my life. I'd give my life for her just so she never had to face another day of sadness.

Please, I'm asking for guidance, not convictions.

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