My own NC thread.

The longest I've gone NC was 6 days. There were a few times he reached out but it was mainly me. And me trying to make up for my mistakes thinking him if I showed him I really did care, then he'd have a change of heart. Two months later and he most likely hates me now. I could reach out and he'd probably answer but I'd just annoy him at this point. I can't hold on to "maybe once we have fixed our personal issues." He's gone and no matter how much it hurts, I need to accept that.

I tried the online sites again but I'm not in the place. I've been chatting with one person and it just makes me feel worse. I'm an attractive female and I have no problem meeting people when I go out. But it's not the same. I'm 31, I've dated a lot. I've been through a lot. At this point, I'd rather be alone.

Today is NC Day 2. He won't reach out. I try not to talk about it with friends and family as some of them still are around him because they knew each other beforehand. That's how we met. So I'm doing this for me. For my own accountability. I started therapy but it's moving slow as the first two weeks were setting goals and treatment plans.

you're doing good.

you have everyone on here for support when you need it.

you can get through it and it will get better

Hang in there and know that everything you are feeling is perfectly normal.

I like to look at it as a withdrawal. It's slow but you can mark the progress.

Even on it's worst day you can look back and acknowledge it was better than it was the week before.

Head high!

Thank you for the support. The thing that makes it the hardest is that he was great to me. And while it is still extremely hard when you know someone is toxic, this feels 10x worse.

I forced myself to make plans with someone on Thursday even though I don't want to date. Someone I had started speaking to while I was briefly on the dating app. I have been open about the fact that I don't exactly know where I stand as far as being ready for anything past friends.

Everyone handles it differently but something I have learned . . that if you choose to date while you are still grieving, you come from a place of need.

You don't have anything offer someone and you don't make very good decisions when you are hungry.

How about spending that time with friends and family instead?

Or sometimes just sitting in the discomfort and processing it is the fastest way to the other side.

Distracting yourself with attention from other men you don't really care for rarely works. .at least not in the long run.

Everyone handles it differently but something I have learned . . that if you choose to date while you are still grieving, you come from a place of need.

You don't have anything offer someone and you don't make very good decisions when you are hungry.

 

How about spending that time with friends and family instead?

Or sometimes just sitting in the discomfort and processing it is the fastest way to the other side.

 

Distracting yourself with attention from other men you don't really care for rarely works. .at least not in the long run.

I agree with you. I feel like it will almost make me miss my ex more. I'm a bit all over the place. I really don't want to, but I already made plans and it'd be a distraction at least for one night. The guy is okay with making friends. I don't plan to try to talk to/date anyone else. It's just like putting a band aid over a wound that needs stitches.

I did the same thing and when I wasn't ready, it just made me feel worse.

It's up to you.