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Thread: To invite or not to invite

  1. #1
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    To invite or not to invite

    My grandmother is 94 years old and we know that it's not long now till she passes, I am organising a family BBQ over the weekend and I am not sure whether I should invite my boyfriend of 3 years. He has only met my family once and very briefly so is this an appropriate circumstance to invite him over to my family's place or should I rather not invite him?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member happyfrank's Avatar
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    Invite him. 3 years is a serious relationship. It's not like your family doesn't know about him.

    Have fun.

  3. #3
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    A casual BBQ is a great way to have a boyfriend and family interact. its not a formal sit down. But why has your family only met your boyfriend once in all this time?

    Also, whose place is the BBQ at -- if its not your home, and at your family's i would say "hey, i am going to invite my boyfriend if that is okay with you" since you are not in charge of who comes to another person's house.

    btw, what does the BBQ have to do with grandma being 94?

  4. #4
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Jesus. Should I make it to 94, I pray my grandkid isn't excluding her boyfriend of 3 years on my behalf because I might croak soon. I'd be like, "Don't put that **** on me."

    It's a barbecue, not her deathbed. Don't think so much into it.

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  6. #5
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    Thanks for all the advice I will go ahead and invite him

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    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by 20Whattodo17
    My grandmother is 94 years old and we know that it's not long now till she passes, I am organising a family BBQ over the weekend and I am not sure whether I should invite my boyfriend of 3 years. He has only met my family once and very briefly so is this an appropriate circumstance to invite him over to my family's place or should I rather not invite him?
    What does grandma being 94 have to do with you inviting your bf to a bbq? Of course invite him, grandma would probably like to meet him plus your family already knows he exists.

  8. #7
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    Why has he only met your family once?

  9. #8
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    That's a good question,
    We live in a different city that is 5hrs away by train or car so he has only come here once. It's slowly almost becoming a deal breaker for me because I have asked him to come but he always says it's too far so now that my grandmother is in her death bed I would appreciate him coming and if he decides to use the distance as an excuse I think I will call it quits. I want a boyfriend who invests as much time into getting to know my family and spend time with them as I have with his and after 3 years if he can't do that for me this is it.

  10. #9
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    Originally Posted by 20Whattodo17
    That's a good question,
    We live in a different city that is 5hrs away by train or car so he has only come here once. It's slowly almost becoming a deal breaker for me because I have asked him to come but he always says it's too far so now that my grandmother is in her death bed I would appreciate him coming and if he decides to use the distance as an excuse I think I will call it quits. I want a boyfriend who invests as much time into getting to know my family and spend time with them as I have with his and after 3 years if he can't do that for me this is it.
    Hold it --- so you made us think that you didn't know if it would be appropriate to invite him because of your grandma and now you are actually using this event as a test to see if he will show.

    If he lives a 5 hour train ride away - yes, its way too far to come to a 3 hour family BBQ at your parents' house. On the other hand, if you planned a weekend together and he had a place to stay and the BBQ was part of it --- then okay AS LONG AS you are not inviting him on a time period where you know he can't get away.

    Also, i think you should be honest with him and tell him that you really would like him to meet your grandma (is she actually dying or is she simply old and you never know how much time she has) and find out when he can best do that --- he can come to the BBQ or he can come when a better time for him is and you can go see Grandma together.

  11. #10
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    I didn't want to put it so direct but she is dying and these are the last few weeks or days that we have with her so just want to make them count.

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