I'm becoming nervous about not having as much to talk about

We’ve known each other for about four months and have been going out for a little over one month. We try to see each other every weekend, and once we spent an entire week together. It used to be that we would talk on the phone every night, for about an hour each time. We are really close, but it feels like I’m running out of new things to talk about. It is starting to make me nervous about talking to her, because without new things to talk about, I feel like I run out of things to say more quickly. It’s to the point where I want to talk to her and see her (again we only see each other once a week since we live an hour apart), but I’m also apprehensive about talking on the phone now. Our phone conversations have started to become shorter. I feel like this early in the relationship, this shouldn’t be happening. It should be that we are talking more often and about more things. But we have already opened up so much and talked about so much, that it feels like the well is running dry.

 

I don’t think she feels this way, but I am starting to. This has been causing me a lot of anxiety, because this relationship mean so much to me, and I know it means a lot to her too. We are really good for each other – our personalities mesh, we are both super supportive, really genuine, and put importance in honesty and not hiding our problems. I’m 28 and have never been in a relationship, so I have no experience. She wanted to go out with me anyway, despite knowing this. She is really patient with my lack of relational and sexual experience and is just a really kind and affectionate girl. We cuddle all the time, kiss a lot, and hug and hold hands a ton. We both watch Game of Thrones, our worries and dreams, and like deep conversations. She likes to watch the Bachelor/ette, though she doesn’t seem to take any interest in my hobby of video games (that’s the only real non perfect aspect of the relationship, though it doesn’t bother me all that much. No relationship is perfect) There is a lot there – it’s just that I’m starting to feel nervous about running dry in the conversation area.

 

I know this was a bit of a messy rambling post, but I hope you guys understand where I’m coming from. We aren't growing distant, it's just nerves on my part.

Just go with the flow. I can understand being nervous. Maybe you can talk about Game of Thrones telltale video game..

 

Good luck.

Sometimes if you can be silent together and not feel awkward then thats better than constantly talking. Try just being in the moment and not letting your thoughts race in your head.

that it feels like the well is running dry.

realistically, the well of possibilities never runs dry you can literally talk about anything. but i agree with vesper. you don't have to talk all the time as if there's an uncomfortable space to fill you know...people can be comfortably quiet together.

 

you say things are going well, so i wouldn't overthink it.

I'm okay with uncomfortable silences in person, but on the phone it's different. In person there is body language, eye contact, cuddling, kissing etc to take up the silence. On the phone there is only voice.

Does she ask follow up questions when you tell her about your day? Do you two keep up with some form of current events you can talk about? Do you do volunteer work or other activities where you can share anecdotes?

 

Completely agree about comfortable silences -totally fine to shorten the phone calls.

I'm okay with uncomfortable silences in person, but on the phone it's different. In person there is body language, eye contact, cuddling, kissing etc to take up the silence. On the phone there is only voice.

 

I get into conversations with my sister where there are long pauses on the phone as well and its the same theory as in person