My Ex boyfriend left me again for the third time for his ex

I have been in a relationship for 5 years with a man I truly love. He had left me for the third time again for his ex. Prior to me, his relationship with his ex last about 9 years. They had their ons and off also before he started a relationship with me when he thought it was over. The first 2 times he left me, I initiated the no contact rule. It never lasted for 3 months before he came crying back for me. I forgave him, like a fool. The second time he came back around, he made many promises to me, and even stated he was done, and how stupid he was to leave me and would never hurt me again because i would never hurt. Him. We even went forward to me moving closer to him so we can see each other everyday and to prove to me I am for keeps. Well, I sacrifriced everything and moved 1000 miles away from home to be with him not knowing anyone. Getting back with him was Sept 2015, I actually moved after careful thought and believing him Sept 2016. Now, the end of June, 2017, he called me and said he cannot come over and see me anymore because he still loves his ex and trying to work things out. I couldn’t believe after promising he would never have contact with her again, her being so cruel and mean, and he knows it, went back to her. I am so beside myself right now with no one to talk to. We were always happy together, Seeing each other everyday, showering love and happiness to each other. How did he change that quickly towards me, especially he bought me flowers less than a week ago, and saw each other the day before the break up with hugs and kisses! HELP!

He's a liar and a sneak and a cheat, you need to see him for what he is rather than what you want him to be. Can you move back to where you lived before? He's full of sh*t so you need to extricate yourself from him and take all the time you need to get yourself sorted out and then move on from him.

Thank you so much for replying. I am desperate to talk. I wish I was able to move back home but I moved here with my 3 kids. My kids love it here and it's not fair to them especially 2 of them in High school. What makes it worse is i work with him also seeing him 3 out of the 5 days. What else could be worse for me. I thought about finding another job but I will never find a job that will pay me this well. I'm pretty much stuck. Also, his ex lives 900 miles away but will never move to be with him. I did. Go figure.

Stop taking this guy back how many times does he have to cheat or get back with his ex before you say enough is enough you are better off without him trust me

You should have been done after the first incident. He is in love with his ex.

You need to put your kids first, and lose this guy. You need to stop making excuses and find another job, if you're not going to move. You have put you, and your kids in a very bad position.

I'm sorry, but he did not love/respect you. You were a placeholder.

Thank you for your responses. I won't take him back anymore. I can't especially how he hurt not just me but my kids also. I just hope I have that strength to not take him back of he ever looks for me again. My kids will always be first. I am looking for another job, believe it or not, because it hurts too much. I can't even look at him eye to eye. It hurts because he knew how much I went through to move to be with him, and lots of promises broken saying he would never let me cry again. Not just telling me, but to my kids also. There are days I am strong, and try to move forward. And days like today, I just break down and cried. I still love him, miss him but to remind myself that he is heartless. I feel if I vent, it makes me stronger. Don't know if that's true.

Every time you feel weak, think about how he deceived your children. He does not love you. His actions clearly demonstrate this.

Time to love yourself!

I am trying, really trying, everyday to move on. I was stupid to believe him, trusted him and forgave him. I know now, for a fact, that I am a placeholder. Why would he tell me that he still loves me and care for me today. Why would tell me, " I don't want you to leave, I don't" today. Why would he look to make sure I'm at work on days that I work today. I hate this sending mixed feelings. I know, if indeed, he does come looking back for me, I can't and will not go back to him. I just don't understand why getting back with her is such short periods of time but yet with me, it'll last almost 2 years and does this again. First time was 10 months before breaking up with me, the last 2 was 2 years before breaking up with me. What gives? Doesn't make any sense

Sorry, I know texting a lot and o verthinking. I just need help and support to get through this. It's been a little over 3 weeks

Things have never been that great if this is third time he's done this.

I say that becasue he's obviously been in touch with his ex the whole time, more or less. She's always been in the back of his head and they have clearly been getting cozy behind your back - again.

My guess is that she has dated other people in the intermittent periods when he came back to you. But when she is single, they get in touch with each other and now they've decided to give it a go again. Sadly, it's time for you to stop putting so much weight on what he says, and a lot more on what he does. Three break-ups in five years, for the ex? This isn't love.

I am trying, really trying, everyday to move on. I was stupid to believe him, trusted him and forgave him. I know now, for a fact, that I am a placeholder. Why would he tell me that he still loves me and care for me today. Why would tell me, " I don't want you to leave, I don't" today. Why would he look to make sure I'm at work on days that I work today. I hate this sending mixed feelings. I know, if indeed, he does come looking back for me, I can't and will not go back to him. I just don't understand why getting back with her is such short periods of time but yet with me, it'll last almost 2 years and does this again. First time was 10 months before breaking up with me, the last 2 was 2 years before breaking up with me. What gives? Doesn't make any sense

You put too much weight into peoples words. Do his actions demonstrate someone who cares about you?

Things did not work out with the ex, and so he knew he had you to fall back on. He didn't want to be alone.

close the door, draw a line under this, use whatever phrase you want, but you have to stop taking this man back. think about the lies he has told you. how will you ever know if he is being honest?

look after yourself and your kids' interests.

DO NOT TAKE HIM BACK AGAIN.

good luck.

I know a woman in your shoes . She kept taking him back

And he Kept ping ponging .

My advice , change your number and force yourself to move on. He's going to use you and her as safety nets where the only person who benefits is him . This will never change . He will never choose you or her . He chooses himself and so far that plans working . Think about it .

Thank you every one for your responses. I read everyone of them and really feel that you want the best for me. I'm trying really hard to move on. It will take time and I do need to vent. Days i will be strong, days I know I will break down.

I shouldn't, but I wonder if they will last this time around since I'm the threat who lives too close to him.

What comes around comes around....karma.

He admitted it the second time wanting me back.

Hope I don't sound cruel but I hope it doesn't work out between them. I want him to truly regret it for the rest of his life what he put me through.

Keep supporting me. In time, I will be strong again.

I hope that you have blocked and deleted this guy???

Yes I did, but it sucks that I have to see him at work

It Yes like he has deeper roots with the ex. He's trying to figure out what he wants for him and you should figure out what YOU want. What he has told you about their relationship is one sided...they may have many great things that you don't know about or choose not to see. It sucks but you cant change how he feels and it sounds like he is weighing his options. You should not be a back up plan for him. Do you.

I'm sure they had great times together and tough also. Just hurts if he really do love her, then why start another relationship and hurt the second one. It sucks for me to be the backup plan, but I know for sure my side is over. I am in just so much pain right now, I am so lost and besides myself.