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Thread: Guys...I've done it again

  1. #1
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    Guys...I've done it again

    Hi guys, I'm sad to say that I engaged in "sex" again without really being into it or feeling into it. Yes, I acted like an object AGAIN. This happened on Friday night at 3 AM with the SAME GUY I posted in the post below. I have isolated myself ever since in my room, for the rest of the weekend

    It kind of hurt and he did the "jackhammer" style at some points. I WAS NOT aroused during the entire time.
    there has to be something very wrong with me if I keep doing this...I really don't know. I feel like I'm trying to get "love" from this guy who I don't think he is really capable of or interested in. I know this sounds crazy and I feel I can't tell anyone this (why would anyone want to hear such a strange dilemma?) I really do feel like an alien.
    The entire day after we didn't text until late next night he sends "..." Obviously he is oblivious to what I was feeling. I said I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I was going to.
    I said "I feel like an object and that I think that makes me act like one" The he replied "I made you feel like an object?" I said "Im not saying its you I'm saying it's a feeling I have sometimes" Then he says "I had fun I didn't think you were an object to me" "Im sorry if I was rough but I really couldn't tell sometimes I asked a few times too"

    Then I asked "Are you happy with this relationship?" Then he says "not really", then I said "what could be better? Like seeing each other more often?" Then he said "everything could be better" and I said I agree. I tried to make him say more with more questions, I even said 'if other aspects were better maybe I would enjoy the sex more" He just responded "Idk". "I'm sorry if you feel objectified I won't ask you to do this again." Then I tried to say it's not directly his fault that I play a part in the objectified feeling but he didn't keep on with the convo he just sent me a video of a song he played on that night that I said I didn't like 0__0.

    This has got my head reeling. Why am I so adamant and "attached" to this person? Why am I so numb? I feel like there is NO ONE I can talk to, and that even therapists won't really be able to help me.

    I am not living right I guess, but why can't I feel sex and people around me are going around doing hook-ups and stuff like that and enjoying it. I feel so warped in my sexuality, and when people talk about sex or are around people that I know are active I feel like inadequate or like something is wrong with me.







  2. #2
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    Why hasn't anyone replied anything? This isn't playing around, not a troll either. It is a real thing.

  3. #3
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    I guess I am alone then

  4. #4
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
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    What answers do you want? You know it was wrong and you're upset. What could we contribute?

  5.  

  6. #5
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    Originally Posted by mustlovedogs
    What answers do you want? You know it was wrong and you're upset. What could we contribute?
    Well this site is called Enotalone, and I think most people are posting problems here, hence "wrong negative things" and most I would say are more upset then happy...

  7. #6
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    I guess why do some people keep doing things that aren't good for them..

  8. #7
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cherubrock
    I guess why do some people keep doing things that aren't good for them..
    Could be many things: Low self-esteem, insecure, some thrive on the drama, some want the attention, look for validation etc etc etc.

    I would suggest therapy.

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    Originally Posted by Capricorn3
    Could be many things: Low self-esteem, insecure, some thrive on the drama, some want the attention, look for validation etc etc etc.

    I would suggest therapy.
    That's what I think I'm going to do...but I think I need a open-minded out of the box thinking therapist with a lot of experience...

  10. #9
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by cherubrock
    That's what I think I'm going to do...but I think I need a open-minded out of the box thinking therapist with a lot of experience...
    I think right now ANY therapist would be a good start to help you sort out all of your issues. Make an appointment and take it from there.

  11. #10
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    I just don't understand my sexual response...I have done "e-sex" and have really enjoyed it a couple times...sometimes I get more aroused by kissing or a guy massaging my back then by being completely naked on top of a guy in bed, haha.

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