Ive not been truly happy for a while now...

In 2014 I met this girl over Facebook and we instantly hit it off. We dated seriously for around a year and a half and then I started to not feel ready for a fully committed relationship being at a young age. So we broke up but then I started to get feelings again but at this time she was starting to date someone new. We ended up talking after I messaged her asking if she wanted to meet. We met and she stoped things with this other guy, then later on after another good 6 months I got scared of being in a committed relationship yet again. We then broke things off once more. After all this I felt like I couldn't date her again even though I had never lost feelings fully, I thought theI was getting scared was just with her so I decided to try move on. I started talking to various other girls but during this time she kept messaging me saying she still had feelings, I mostly ignored them but to an extent where we fell out. This was also due to the fact I was getting close to one of her old friends all though I never had the intent to actually date her. The reason I mostly connected with her friend was because she was so like my old girlfriend. Anyway my ex thought we were something was happening and that added to the fall out. Now after the fall out its 2017 and has been around 6/7 months. She has now found a new boyfriend yet I have never lost feelings for her. As days go on I have still not told her due to the fact I have messed with her emotions in the past. I do still have very strong feelings for her and it hurts me to think I have lost her. I have tried to forget about her and move on by blocking her on everything and just removing her from my life whilst moving on talking to new girls but none of them keep my attention. If I could go back I would reassure myself to not be scared of commitment and stay together because honestly it was the happiest time of my life. So I'm writing this to ask anyone out there for help on what I should do... ethier keep trying to move on which I have been doing for around 7 months or tell her and risk it all?

What scares you so much about commitment?

I get scared because I have 2 brothers and 1 half brother. My 2 full brothers are blind and have a rare desease which will affect them from having long lives with family's and my half brother had children at a really young age and it really has affected his life. I'm just feel like I have lots of pressure on me to get into a committed relationship from my parents.

You have no empathy. Everything is about you.

Leave her alone.

I get scared because I have 2 brothers and 1 half brother. My 2 full brothers are blind and have a rare desease which will affect them from having long lives with family's and my half brother had children at a really young age and it really has affected his life. I'm just feel like I have lots of pressure on me to get into a committed relationship from my parents.

What you wrote here is significant. Until you can see that commitment isn’t a trap, you're going to keep running away from any girl you have strong feelings for and dumping her for reasons that have nothing to do with her at all.

It may too be late to salvage what you had with this girl, but it's not too late for you to learn from your mistakes. Whether it's with friends, a therapist, or group therapy, it's really important that you discuss what's scaring you so that the next time you feel this fear, you'll be able to slow down and act in a way that honors what's truly important to you, instead of acting out of fear.