Trying not to cheat

Ok my boyfriend and I have known each other for 8 years and have been dating for 3. We have been best friends since we were in middle school; I love him and want us to work the sex is great, we communicate and he makes me happy. Then there's "john" we have nothing in common whatsoever in fact I despise his character but physically it's fireworks he's like a drug. (We "hung out" for a while BEFORE I started dating my bf) socially we run in the same group so I can't avoid him... I deleted him off all social media and blocked his phone. I do not want to ruin what I have with my bf but I'll admit there have been close calls. What more can I do to stop this before I do something incredibly stupid and ruin an amazing relationship.

You will have to tough on yourself to not let yourself waiver and get involved with this other guy. You've made a good start by not following him on social media and blocking him on your phone. This comes down to you being vigilant and determined to not lose control of yourself.

Is "John" actually trying to get with you or are you just crushing from afar?

How can you have close calls when you are just hanging out? Either it is on or it is not....

How old are you, OP?

I ask because if you are young, and it seems you are given the time-frame of your friendship-turned-relationship with your boyfriend, it's important to realize that you are probably not ready to commit to just one guy. You've done the right thing by keeping your distance from this John, but you might also want to ask yourself if your relationship has run its course.

Is "John" actually trying to get with you or are you just crushing from afar?

Ok so I'm the past we basically just called one another if we were horny; I'm not the greatest person in the world and I have cheated in past relationships with him however romantic wise I know and he knows it would never work it's never even been like that. The physical chemistry between us however is undeniable but I really do want to be with my bf. And no I haven't had sex oral or otherwise with john since we started dating

How old are you, OP?

 

I ask because if you are young, and it seems you are given the time-frame of your friendship-turned-relationship with your boyfriend, it's important to realize that you are probably not ready to commit to just one guy. You've done the right thing by keeping your distance from this John, but you might also want to ask yourself if your relationship has run its course.

I'm 20 and I've been in relationships where ik it's over feelings aren't there but with my bf 3 years later and I still get all giddy when he's around, I can't wait to here his voice, that kinda stuff

You will have to tough on yourself to not let yourself waiver and get involved with this other guy. You've made a good start by not following him on social media and blocking him on your phone. This comes down to you being vigilant and determined to not lose control of yourself.

Thank you for your comment there were a lot judging me for even thinking about another guy but it's nice that someone sees I'm making efforts to not up a great thing

Ok so I'm the past we basically just called one another if we were horny; I'm not the greatest person in the world and I have cheated in past relationships with him however romantic wise I know and he knows it would never work it's never even been like that. The physical chemistry between us however is undeniable but I really do want to be with my bf. And no I haven't had sex oral or otherwise with john since we started dating

Then you just have to be convicted in going zero contact with this other dude which will help you to get over your addiction to having him as your eff-buddy. You can't quit smoking if you keep having a drag off of a cigarette... and do yourself a huge favor... even if you and your current boyfriend don't make a lifelong go of it, don't call your eff buddy for filler. Time to give up your 'drug' of choice for good.