Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 56

Thread: PLEASE HELP any men out there that are attracted to just one woman?

  1. #1
    mayviolet

    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Posts
    7

    Exclamation PLEASE HELP any men out there that are attracted to just one woman?

    I was just wondering if there is any men out there that are attracted to just one woman?

    I recently went on my boyfriends phone to show him this video on instagram and when the search bar came up there was his history underneath it with sooooo many women he had searched that were completely perfect, air brushed, boob and bum implants the lot. It even has who's profile you go on the most and some profiles were above mine. I am such an insecure person to begin with and I know its such a ugly trait and I'd give anything in the whole world to not feel insecure but I can't help it, and it just made me feel sick and cry.

    He said its normal for all men to look at porn which i get and would be less upset at than the images of these perfect women. I just feel if he is looking at these images all the time of course he is going to compare me to them and become resentful of me for not looking this way; he has already said he wishes i were skinnier. And he also doesn't seem to grasp the fact that these women aren't real, I asked him why he liked fake boobs etc. and he said the women he looks at just work really hard to get their physique and he likes looking at them because their perfectness turns him on. I study architecture and waitress and i find it so hard to put focus on exercise and looking like these women alongside balancing life. He is a sponsored athlete so him looking good is just a product of him working hard to achieve his goals, but its the opposite for me since working hard is mainly sitting at a desk. I'm 70kg and do martial arts 2-3 times a week and I know I'm overweight but i also don't feel my size is a major health concern, but he'll say things like I just want you to get healthy. He doesn't seem to understand that this puts so much pressure on me on top of all of the other things i have to worry about and once again makes me feel not good enough.

    He says he thinks that most women are beautiful and he looks at these images for 'novelty' and that he would never cheat on me. He is respectful to me, he doesn't stare massively at beautiful women or like womens photos on social media, but for me this sometimes isn't enough. Physical loyalty is not enough if he is constantly mentally fantasising about these other women and how much better they are. I really don't understand why he doesn't just break up with me, because I would if i was fantasising about someone else.

    I just really want a man that doesn't think other women are beautiful and that thinks I'm perfect. :That looks at me and thinks I'm amazing and enough and he doesn't need to look at perfect women to get off. He says I'm acting like a deluded 4 year old and that all men fantasise about other women and i literally felt like someone had just told me Santa wasn't real. There has to be some men out there?????? I really feel I'm not asking for too much, I don't look at porn, I don't find other men attractive and I think his body is perfect in every way possible. I just want someone who feels the same. I literally don't even care about porn it didn't bother me once in past relationships but I fee with him it is something more, maybe its because now I've see the people he looks at and know he likes them for their perfectness and that i will never compare, I don't know. Am I just stupidly looking for some man to be obsessed with me and thats never going to happen?

    I feel so low and insecure right now, this really upsets me and i cannot for the life of me understand why, i thought it was just my time of the month but its been a few weeks that I've been feeling like this. I've always hated cheaters because I've been cheated on before by my ex and my friend but right now i can actually understand it because I just want that sensation of a man making me feel like theres no one else and telling me I'm beautiful and its so annoyng because thats literally what all of them women on instagram get constantly all day from men like my boyfriend when they are neglecting me.

    I know i am crazy and don't think anyone has read my ramblings but and any advice you could give me to make me less crazy or even why i am crazy or even if you you understand my craziness would be so helpful

  2. #2
    mustlovedogs
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    1,849
    Thanked
    1605

    PLEASE HELP any men out there that are attracted to just one woman?

    I couldn't read your whole post because in the end it doesn't matter.

    Are you telling me you do not find ANY other guy out there attractive? No actors, celebrities, strangers on the street?

    ETA: your weight is fine, and him pressuring you is more of a problem (imo) than him looking at other women.

  3. Thanks Lisii, WombatShadow, jujusamples thanked for this post
  4. #3
    Nikego
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2017
    Posts
    56
    Thanked
    30
    As a woman ive only been really attracted to a few men. Im really attracted to my current guy. I think you should find yourself a new man! The right man will boost your selfworth 10fold!

  5. #4
    Iggy5129
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Age
    31
    Posts
    1,174
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    838
    You have unrealistic expectations. If you expect other people to behave the way you do you will be very disappointed. This is a problem within yourself. He is not doing anything wrong. Finding other people attractive is normal and healthy. I think you need to work on yourself and your insecurity instead of taking it out on him.

  6. Thanks Lisii, LaHermes thanked for this post
  7. #5
    DancingFool
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Wilds of Texas
    Posts
    6,024
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    4651
    I don't want a man who looks at me and thinks I'm perfect.....I want a man who looks at all my flaws and sees color, depth, character, life experience, interest and LOVES all of me, flaws and all. Perfect doesn't exist and ultimately, it's kind of bland if you really think about it. Those photos he is looking at aren't the real women, they are made up, photoshoped, airbrushed avatars. Some so extreme it's actually comical and grotesque. It might be entertaining for him, but real life needs more substance than an airbrushed avatar. So I hope that you understand somehow that you will ALWAYS bring more to the table than an avatar.

  8. #6
    mayviolet

    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Posts
    7
    I understand that. I feel that way too. I just feel like he doesn't and thats what bothers me. He puts them on this pedestal and says they are natural and real and just work hard. Maybe I just need a more intellectual guy that understands and appreciates real beauty instead of a zombie sucked into the current beauty standards idk.

  9. #7
    mayviolet

    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Posts
    7
    I can look at a man and say if i think he's handsome, but like a pretty pattern not in a sexual way. I wouldn't sit and jack off to a photo of a guy because I'm way more attracted to personality and if they pursue me if you know what i mean

  10. #8
    DancingFool
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Wilds of Texas
    Posts
    6,024
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    4651
    Quote Originally Posted by mayviolet [Register to see the link]
    I understand that. I feel that way too. I just feel like he doesn't and thats what bothers me. He puts them on this pedestal and says they are natural and real and just work hard. Maybe I just need a more intellectual guy that understands and appreciates real beauty instead of a zombie sucked into the current beauty standards idk.
    Then sounds like you really are dating the wrong kind of a guy for you and need to look for someone better.

  11. Thanks LaHermes thanked for this post
  12. #9
    Krankor
    Gold Member Krankor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    797
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    662
    Quote Originally Posted by mayviolet [Register to see the link]
    I understand that. I feel that way too. I just feel like he doesn't and thats what bothers me. He puts them on this pedestal and says they are natural and real and just work hard. Maybe I just need a more intellectual guy that understands and appreciates real beauty instead of a zombie sucked into the current beauty standards idk.
    So, a man whose ancestors didn't evolve on planet Earth? That informs what we tend to find atttactive as much as some "current beauty standard." Men are biologically programmed to look at other women. Like, literally, we can't help it. In the end, who we go home to matters more than anything.

    Now, if he's throwing these women in your face and saying "why can't you look like this?" that's not OK. You did mention too that he has brought up your weight, which I think is wrong. In that case, I think it would be fair game to find some images of air-brushed guys with perfect abs and pecs and tell him that "with a little effort" he could look like them but that he currently does not, so maybe you won't hold him to impossible standards if he will give you the same courtesy.

    Now, I admit I didn't have the patience to quite read your whole post, so I may have missed some key points. But in the end, yes, we all look. You women all look too. It's nothing personal and is unfair to make your insecurities your partner's problem.

  13. Thanks mustlovedogs, Lisii, LaHermes, Jibralta thanked for this post
  14. #10
    mayviolet

    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Posts
    7
    Yeah but the ones he was looking at are the current beauty standard of skinny as with massive boob and butt implants. The current beauty standard is that currently and it changes every few years--- a lot quicker than evolution. There must be men that are repulsed by women getting plastics and poisons put inside themselves in order to look a certain way for men? Because I want a man like that. I couldn't care less if he noticed if a girl is pretty, I just don't want him to visualise himself ing her and get off to it? Or if he must do that then at least be intelligent enough to like real women and not an 'avatar'??
    So many men say that thing about its who you go home to but they don't get that I would be so much happier and have so much higher self esteem alone than have a man come home to me thats been thinking about other women all day.
    However, its becoming pretty clear that this kind of man doesn't exist.....

  15.  

Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Top Threads
Help really need some advice from someone
Need advice!! Sorry long post So in need advice I'm completely broken and at a loss of what is right or wrong. I've been seeing this guy for over a
Could this be love?
Hi, so i recently got out of a relationship and it wasn't that long and it ended pretty abruptly. I had been in contact, as a friend, a guy who i
Anniversary
Hi! So my guy and I are getting ready to celebrate our anniversary. We mutually agreeded that we would not get eachother presents because we are
Featured Threads
I love you, but I'm not in love with you.
So my fiancÚ of 7.5 years has decided she isn't in love with me anymore so has broken up with me. Our situation is very complicated we have a 2.5
How far should I go with unfriending/blocking on social media?
Hi all, I'm going hard no contact. She originally unfriended me on Snap and Twitter. I recently unfriended her on FB and IG. I also went a step
missing atm
I think what I miss at the moment is having a friend to talk to like we used to. She became the only person I really talked to for the better part
Mum boyfriend inapropriate
Hi everyone, thought i would share an update on whats happened so far. Thankyou all for helping me out yesterday, everything you all said was really
Girlfriend always mad at me
Me and my girlfriend have been togetehr for almost a year. I love her more than anything and i know shes not cheating on me or anything like that
I [F/26] found underwear in my boyfriend's [M/30] pocket.
I've been with my boyfriend for over a year. Recently, my boyfriend asked me to look for some money, so I looked everywhere and I couldn't find it. I
Ex gf text me out of the blue
I guess I just want some feedback and honest replies as my head is completely gone again. Me and my ex gf have been in no contact for a few months
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •