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Thread: Thoughts, Rants, and Musings

  1. #631
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    My seven-year anniversary with Arnold is coming up. That's the longest either of us has ever been in a relationship.

    My max was 18 months, back when I was 17 lol. After that, it was pretty much carnage.

    A couple months into our relationship, I took Arnold to meet my cousins. They all liked him. When Arnold came around again the next year, my cousin David exclaimed, "You're still here!"

    Arnold didn't know how to take that. He thought it was both funny and slightly offensive.

    So, when our two-year anniversary came up and officially marked my longest relationship, I got Arnold a t-short that said, "I'M STILL HERE."

    I figured he could wear it in front of David and get a laugh.

    This year, I think we're both deserving of t-shirts.

  2. #632
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    The GC on one of my jobs (Mike) contacted me and said he had a possible opportunity. So, I arranged a meeting with Mike and the potential client.

    When I arrived at the client's office, Mike was sitting in the small reception area, chatting with the receptionist. Upon seeing me enter the suite, he said in his Italian accent, "This is Jibralta."

    I extended my hand to the receptionist and we shook hands.

    She didn't introduce herself, so I said, "What's your name?"

    She gave me a strange look, and then said, "Jibralta."

    I was like, "Oh, I'm Jibralta, too!"

    Then I turned to Mike and saw him sitting back. I realized that what he had done was pretty funny. He'd introduced us both with an impressive economy of words.

  3. #633
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    That coworker of mine, Lisa, brings to mind this post by Frazen, from back in January:

    Originally Posted by Frazen
    It might sound like a silly issue to you, but I'm a very sensitive person. I have antlers with which I detect people's emotions, and my agility in sympathizing has helped me a lot in my life; it's a type of emotional intelligence, but it has its own downsides: I have an insatiable desire for people's emotions. I love to see them cry or laugh uncontrollably, I love it when they share their problems with me, I suck in their thoughts, their feelings, and their memories and it gives me so much meaning in life.
    That post stuck in my mind because I thought it was an interesting disposition, and possibly the opposite of mine. Although, I can't say for sure that I am repelled by other people's emotions. It could be that I am just suspicious of them, having been raised in a home where I was burdened by them.

    Anyway, I remembered this post a couple of weeks ago, while talking to Lisa. Sometimes when I talk to her, she seems so interested. It's like she's feeding off of what I'm saying, gaining sustenance. And I'm sitting there like, "How is this so interesting to her?? Is she eating my emotions? Does she have antlers??"

    I couldn't for the life of me remember who had posted the quote above. I had a vague impression of their avatar. But today, as I was clicking around, I found it! So, I'm putting it here so that I can find it again.

  4. #634
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    I had a weirdly stressful situation today, driving a short 10 minutes from one place to another. It started after I ended up behind a really slow person. When we got to the next light, I pulled up alongside her on the left. It was a three-lane road, and I was now in the middle lane, at the front of the line. I intended to pass the slowpoke as soon as the light changed.

    Right as I found my position, I heard an ambulance approaching. After a few moments of siren only, I saw it coming up behind the stack of traffic that I fronted. I started to shift over towards my right to let the ambulance by me on the left, but it seemed that the ambulance wanted to pass me on the right instead of the left.

    I didn't know where the ambulance expected me to go. There was another car on my left, and limited room. There was ample space the middle of the intersection, but if I drove my car into the intersection I risked blocking the path of the ambulance (I couldn't tell which way he was heading).

    So, I slowly and carefully navigated my car to the left. But it seemed like no amount of space I made was enough for the impatient ambulance! I heard his shrill ambulance horn buzzing over the siren. Finally, there was nowhere left for me to go but into the middle of the intersection.

    Then ambulance passed, the light turned green, the traffic gridlocked into the intersection, but I swiftly circumvented Ms. Slowpoke and was back on my way. I marveled about the aggressiveness of the ambulance driver and remembered when I'd seen an ambulance flipped on its side on the Parkway. "That's how it happens," I mused to myself, "Aggression is a form of stupidity."

    Traffic narrowed to a slow-moving single file column, typical for that road at that time. As I idled at one of the lights, an oncoming pickup truck paused alongside my car. I could tell he wanted to make a left into the convenience store that I was semi-blocking. So, I let my car roll forward to make some space for him to turn in behind me.

    In my rear view mirror, I watched the car behind me roll forward and close the gap I'd just made. So, I rolled forward again. The car behind me rolled forward again and closed the gap. It was Ms. Slowpoke, clearly an idiot. I was like, "What the f*ck are you doing?" I rolled forward some more, and she rolled right up behind me like someone had stapled her bumper to my bumper.

    I had no more space to roll. The guy in the pick up truck was S.O.L. I was yelling into my rear view mirror. Ms. Oblivious Slowpoke back there was making me into a jerk. I cast a worried glance at the pick up driver and--to my great surprise--saw that he was laughing heartily.

    I felt better instantly. I realized that Slowpokey had probably been the source of that whole rigmarole with the ambulance, as well--her immovable oblivion was probably the reason why I had to jockey my car all around the frickin road to let the ambulance by!
    Last edited by Jibralta; 06-25-2019 at 08:07 PM.

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  6. #635
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    I am getting the impression that many people are aware of my intense dislike for Frank. I've been deliberately vocal on the subject at work, but the information seems to have gone a bit deeper than I'd intended.

    For example, a couple of weeks ago, I overheard Joe (structural engineer) and Ray (his manager) talking in one of the conference rooms. They were meeting about the project that I worked on for Frank--a real disaster that I would like to be done with forever.

    Frank was late for the meeting and Ray was saying, "Let's just talk to Jibralta. She knows the project and she'll be able to tell us what we need to know." Joe said, "I think we should just wait for Frank. Jibralta doesn't want anything to do with this project. It just makes her angry."

    But Ray still wanted to talk to me. I realized that I had a ridiculous expression on my face (a wide-eyed angry grimace) when Joe laughed and said, "You see?" But I acquiesced and they went easy on me.

    Yesterday, I don't remember exactly how it went, but they were making jokes about me and that project, and Frank. To my face, of course. They were having a grand old laugh about it. I laughed; it was amusing. But I do worry that this could cause more problems for me and stupid Frank. He never reacts the way I expect him to. He always does something extremely stupid.

  7. #636
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Just watched My Best Friend's Wedding for possibly the second time in my life.

    It was ok.

    I don't know why I thought I might like it better this time around.

    I think my perspective on life changed since I first saw it. I think I rooted more for Julia Roberts' character back then. Interestingly, I noticed that many of the people who wrote reviews for the movie talked about having the same experience. I guess priorities change for all of us.

    I also found it sort of boring. There were definitely some funny parts, and some great physical comedy by Julia Roberts, but it didn't move forward smoothly.

    Some things that didn't change since the first time I watched it: Rupert Everett stole the show again. Hands down the funniest character in the movie. Razor sharp. Cameron Diaz, too. She's hilarious. I love when she slams Julia Roberts against the bathroom stall and calls her "Big Hair." I loved that even when I used to root for Julia's character.

    I think I'll watch Bad Moms next.

  8. #637
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LHGirl
    My sister's husband's 90-something grandmother lost all her money by a Madoff type, right after he was exposed. She went from living a comfortable retirement lifestyle to counting pennies. It was hard to watch.
    Originally Posted by ~Seraphim ~
    My mom and step dad lost everything to an investor. Now my step dad has to work until he drops dead. He is 80 this year and still works full time . He lost his entire pension to someone he trusted. Then the company he used to work for went bankrupt so they lost their benefits. So I get to watch my mom and stepdad do with out when they busted their ass their whole life.
    A Ponzi scheme hit close to home for me. My family and I were not affected, thank god. But my friends' family was affected. The worst thing was that the scam was perpetrated by our mutual friend's parents.

    The mutual friend was named Paul Nadin.* His parents were Mr. and Mrs. Nadin, collectively refered to as "The Nadins" by all. The Nadins were quirky, charming, and morbidly obese.

    My friends and I hung out at the Nadins' house when I was 15 - 17. It was complete chaos there. We could pretty much do anything we wanted in Paul's room, which occupied two rooms in the lower level of the house. We smoked cigarettes, smoked pot, drank. Paradise for rebellious kids.

    The Nadins largely ignored what we were doing. They weren't stupid; they knew what was going on, and occasionally Mrs. Nadin would have a meltdown and say, "No smoking! No pot!" But then she'd go back on her Prozac and things would return to normal. Paul's friends--all of us--were welcome in their home. His parents cooked us large, expensive meals of steak and lobster, treated everyone like family. Two of Paul's close friends, Ray and Ethan, actually lived with them. Paul's sister's boyfriend lived with them as well.

    The Nadins were also fond of my boyfriend, Ed. Ed didn't live with them, but he spent a lot of time over there. Ed and I started dating when I was 15, and then I spent a lot of time at the Nadins', too. For the record, Ed didn't smoke, drink or do drugs. And within 6 months of us dating, I ceased smoking pot & cigarettes. I wasn't much of a drinker at that point. I abstained from all of these substances during the 18 months that we were together. Just thought I'd throw that in there.

    Mr and Mrs. Nadin were both accountants. My first job ever was working for them during tax season. Like their home, their office was chaotic. I remember when the time came for my first paycheck, Mr. Nadin opened his checkbook and said, "How much do you want?" I suspected at that time that I could probably name any wage and I would get it. But I didn't want to feel a sense of obligation. So, I gave him the minimum wage amount, which was at that time about $5.05/hr.

    During tax season, the Nadins sent Ed and me to the food store with a huge grocery list and a blank check. We got everything on their list, which was way too much for even their house full of people to consume. Much of the food went bad. The food actually rotted in the house and it took a long time before someone cleaned it. This happened numerous times.

    At the end of tax season, the Nadins bought a Sedan de Ville and gave the Town Car to Paul. Paul was only 16 at the time and had no license. Not long after that, the Nadins bought and moved into a new house and left the old house to Paul.

    Ed and I gradually grew apart from Paul and his family. But Ray and Ethan remained very close to them. When Paul finished school (I think he went the GED route), his parents bought him a gas station and a fleet of tow trucks. Ethan started working for Paul as a mechanic in his garage (all of this was very convenient for me when my car broke down!).

    Ethan started dating a friend of mine named Cheryl. Ray and Paul moved out of Paul's house and Cheryl moved in. Somehow this was ok with everyone. The Nadins took Cheryl and Ethan on yearly vacations with Paul, Paul's sister, and their respective significant others to places like Cancun, the Bahamas, Disney World, Venezuela, etc.

    When I graduated high school and went to college, I lost touch with that group of people more and more. They still took care of me if I got a flat, needed a jump or a tow, or if I locked my keys in my car (embarrassingly frequent occurrence). But day-to-day communication was basically nil.

    Ethan and Cheryl married. They had two kids, bought a house.

    Paul's parents bought Paul a junk yard and Ethan started running Paul's garage.

    Then the recession hit and Paul's parents got busted by the FBI for running a ponzi scheme. LOTS of people had been scammed out of their life's savings.

    Mr. and Mrs. Nadin were tried and convicted. Both were sent to prison. Mr. Nadin died there. Paul lost his garage, his gas stations, tow trucks, and his junk yard. Obviously, the Nadins lost their accounting firm. Their daughter kept her travel agency, and some suspect she's hidden some of the stolen money overseas.

    The worst thing about all of this is that Ethan and Cheryl, who really had no inkling that this was going on, lost their house. Poor Ethan, who looked on the Nadins as parents, had signed a bunch of paperwork that made him the owner of all these seized properties. He had no idea that the Nadins had paid for the property using stolen money. He thought he was doing them a tax favor. And, since they took such good care of him and Chryl, he felt obligated to help them.

    ---------------------------------------------
    *totally fake name--all these names are fake, as usual. I just hate doing the single-initial thing.

  9. 07-06-2019, 01:28 PM


  10. #638
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Catherine died. She was found dead in her home during a house fire. Nobody knows what happened. It's possible that nobody outside of her immediate family will ever know.

    I found out about it in the most random way. Arnold had woken up one night around 1AM, got up and went out to the living room to schmooze around. I got up about a half an hour later to use the bathroom. When he heard me, he called out, "Catherine's dead. She died in a house fire."

    I was like, what the hell? How could he know something like that? Neither of us know anyone who knew her aside from my coworkers.

    Apparently, it showed up on his yahoo news feed as local news.

    I sat down on the couch with him and googled it. It was there in the news. A neighbor reported a fire, and the firemen found Catherine dead as they fought the fire.

    I figured it was a suicide, but of course I don't know.

    I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, but Catherine attempted to commit suicide a couple of months after she was laid off. I wasn't surprised then, either.

    I guess I should probably feel bad or sad, but I don't feel much about Catherine but repugnance. She crossed some line with me and I just have this cold indifference towards her.

    I don't think many people get to this point with me, but it does happen.

    I do feel bad for the two sons that she fathered. They are pretty young, and I am sure they will be devastated. Suicide or not, it's a terrible way for someone to go.

    Well, the mode of death might not matter long to the person dying, but it does matter for the people they leave behind.

  11. #639
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    Jib, I read this a few days ago. I literally gasped when I read it. I didn't have time to respond until now.

    Despite the difficulties and differences and struggles she had, I am sad her life came to a tragic end in such a way. And I am especially sad for her kids.

  12. #640
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    This sounds terrible, but I mainly feel relieved that there is no chance that I will run into her again.

    Seriously.

    I cannot tell you how deep that sense of relief is.

    I do understand the tragedy, and part of me does sympathize with it. But maybe that's just in a general sense.

    There's so much I can say about this whole thing, but I think it will be a while before I can get my thoughts together.

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