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Quiet girl: does she want to be left alone, or should I try to talk to her?


Goulash

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I'm a 19 years old ("recovering shy") guy, and I'm interested in this very quiet girl from college, she always sits by herself and always leaves class in a hurry. Her apparent shyness is what made me curious about her to begin with. I talked to her once, and the seemed nice enough, she actually talked a lot more than I thought she would. However, she never noticed me again after that, whenever we cross each other in the corridors she keeps looking ahead/down. If I say hi, she answers, but smiling only politely. She never looks at me in class, or shows any sign of attraction whatsoever. I know we didn't talk enough for any attraction to spark on her side though. I still wanted to talk to her a bit more, and see if we open up to each other, but I can't shake off the feeling that she just don't want to be bothered. It's been 2 weeks since we had that first conversation, and I was thinking about talking to her this week. Should I go anyway?

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Can you connect on fb and message a bit about class, college, small talk, etc. to break the ice? Good time to come out of your shell and practice talking to more girls.

 

The only way to tell is to eventually ask her to go have coffee, sort of low key like after class and get a read on things. In the meantime, yeah smile, say hi, make small talk, be friendly, approachable, etc.

I'm interested in this very quiet girl from college, she always sits by herself and always leaves class in a hurry. I talked to her once, and the seemed nice enough, It's been 2 weeks since we had that first conversation, and I was thinking about talking to her this week.
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Can you connect on fb and message a bit about class, college, small talk, etc. to break the ice?

 

I've looked for her on fb, just for curiosity's sake, but I couldn't find her. I do have her phone number though, as we're in the whatsapp group made for the class. Either way, I'm even less confortable talking to people I don't know well by text, I'd much rather do it in person. I guess asking her to have a coffee might be a good one. Thanks for the reply!

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I think you should give her more time to get used to you before asking her out for coffee; a one-on-one situation with someone she doesn't know will be stressful for a shy person. More small talk is needed first. For example, if you see her on a Monday, ask how her weekend was. Don't just say hi because she'll say hi back and keep walking. Ask a follow-up question or two. This way you'll get a sense of what her other hobbies/interests/classes are. Then back off for a week or so. Then at some point ask how her _______ hobby is going/______ class is going/etc. Then she'll know that you are interested enough in her to remember a detail like that. You'll also find out if she *likes* going for coffee or not; maybe based on your conversation you'll think of a different idea of an activity to do with her, like some other event on campus. Good luck.

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