advice? (17 and 27 y.o.)

Hi all, so I realise my situation may be quite controversial not only in terms of age gap but also profession, but please hear me out before sending any hate.

I'm 17, almost 18, and graduating in a couple of months. I have a rather flirtatious relationship with my single 27-year-old "teacher" - the reason I'm putting quotation marks is because he isn't a classroom teacher, but more of a part-time tutor able to be likened to the position of a sports coach or an instrumental tutor. The funny thing is we started off despising one another: he appeared to be stuckup and ego-centric so in return, I often refused to follow his instructions. Yet the snarky remarks eventually turned into sassy, playful and recently flirtatious banter, and we started getting quite close from the beginning of this year. We both realised we had similar interests, and spent time before/after school or during breaks just talking or joking about matters unrelated to school. He was there for a lot of my emotional ups and downs, and I definitely began to see him more as a friend than a teacher, first name basis and all. The connection between us is becoming more and more flirtatious, and we're "shipped" frequently by my friends and his students. He respects me, isn't creepy, and no serious boundaries have been crossed, but the subtle arm touches and stares that linger a little too long are quite obvious signs that he's interested.

I'm developing very strong feelings towards this man, and I'm not too sure how I should go about this?

You might be miss reading cues here. At least lets hope. Because if a 27 year old at a school is interested in a 17 year old he teaches he is a creep. What kind of relationship could you possibly see yourself having with this guy? A guy interested in you in such a situation is already compromised by the situation. Please for your safety stay away.

It's fine to have a crush on a hot attentive teacher. Happens all the time. He's not going to ruin his profession or go to jail to do anything more than be a friendly nice tutor.

I'm 17, almost 18, and graduating in a couple of months. I have a rather flirtatious relationship with my single 27-year-old "teacher"

He's not going to ruin his profession or go to jail to do anything more than be a friendly nice tutor.

I agree strongly with the others, especially with the above consideration and I'm sure you wouldn't want him to risk his freedom and professional life, but that's precisely what will happen if you allow this to continue or worse, encourage it to go further. Please take care of yourself and safeguard your future, too! Good luck, OP.

If you like this guy, you will back away - far, far away - so he doesn't end up in prison. You acting on these feelings could land him in prison or, at the very least, ruin his career.

Even if he doesn't act on it, I'm sure administrators would interpret any flirting on your part as inappropriate behavior on his part.

Don't. It's a crush, nothing more. Use your brain and acknowledge that by instigating anything, you will be helping him in ruining his career.

If you really believe he is being flirty and displays an attraction, then I would have to say this is indeed creepy. The guy is 10 yrs older and is your high school teacher or tutor, whatever. Not normal. You are a young impressionable girl, so he should not be flirting, touching or staring as he is in a position of authority.

This man is immature and has nothing of value to offer you. If he was mature, he wouldn't be hitting on a 17 year old nor risking his job like this. You need to take him off the pedestal. He has no boundaries, no work ethic and very poor judgment. You are about to enter one of the best periods of your life. If you get involved with this person you are liable to loose years that you will never be able to get back and stunt your personal growth. Your life stages are too different for anything good to come out of this

Trust me...it's weird. ESPECIALLY since he's your teacher or whatever. Even when you're 22 and he's 32 it will be a little iffy. Any 27 year old guy that is interested in a 17 year old is a no go. It's fine to have a crush on him but just leave it at that and don't egg him on. Sounds cliche but there are plenty of fish in the sea around your age.

Even if he were closer to your age or you were both full adults, the teacher/student relationship is one not to be crossed. You are crossing a big line if you pursue him and will possibly embarass yourself. Or he will fear harassment charges. Its serious business when someone in an authority role at school has a relationship or a suspected relationship with a student. Just no.

Any 27-year-old expressing interest in a teen is plain off.

The fact that this would cross professional boundaries is also a no-go.

Sorry OP, but this is a terrible idea all around.

Trust me...it's weird. ESPECIALLY since he's your teacher or whatever. Even when you're 22 and he's 32 it will be a little iffy. Any 27 year old guy that is interested in a 17 year old is a no go. It's fine to have a crush on him but just leave it at that and don't egg him on. Sounds cliche but there are plenty of fish in the sea around your age.

I agree that 17 and 27 is way wrong, but why is 22 and 32 iffy?