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"I NEED your Support Thread!" Post here when you need to cry or vent


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I often need a place to vent or cry and a place to check back without hunting down my posts. I consider forum this a safe place to come when I need shoulder to cry on or to vent. I don't always need advice but just a pat of encouragement to keep going. Please share your vents and tears here too. I promise i will be supportive.

my story....

 

My ex and i were together a year. we met when we were both separated. we were/are going through very nasty divorces. he hit a wave of significant financial issues due to his divorce. he got very depressed...didn't want to drag me through it. didn't feel he could consistently provide for me. didn't feel he deserved someone as incredible as me.

 

Still we tried to make it work. he got very depressed...pulled away. we eventually broke up. now i too am going through similar financial stresses due to my divorce. i am also depressed.

 

When he was going through his stuff...i truly thought we could make it work. However, now that i am dealing with the same thing, i know i would have responded the same way he did. i just have broken down. i am not myself anymore.

 

He is doing a little better now and he is having a fling with the receptionist at his job. i found that out 2 weeks ago while i was still holding hope in my heart that when things settle we would eventually reconcile.

 

 

-----I am such a mess since my break and since starting NC. I am considering today done and over. This sunny day reminds me so much of days he and i would call each other and decide to skip work for the afternoon and just have fun. We were so happy together. I can't focus ANYMORE today! i am leaving work early. i am calling it a day. i just can't do it today. i'm going home, pour myself a drink, get in bed and work on my book. and probably cry....alot.

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First off, this thread was here right when I needed it today. So, thanks!

 

However, now that i am dealing with the same thing, i know i would have responded the same way he did. i just have broken down. i am not myself anymore.

 

I am dealing with the rollercoaster of emotions that my ex is experiencing while he is dealing with depression--I'm along for the ride. We were headed toward reconciliation, but now he feels like he just can't deal with the relationship because he is barely managing himself. I am trying so hard to be accepting and empathetic, but it is difficult for me at times because I truly just can't put myself in his shoes. You are really walking in the shoes of your ex now, and I'm so sorry to hear that. I hate to hear that you have to go through those things, but I'm glad that you are recognizing it. Do what you can to take care of yourself. You yourself know that you likely aren't in a position to be with him right now, so try not to focus too much on the fling. When you are in a better place, you both decide if a relationship between you is right.

 

Again, thanks for this thread. I couldn't deal with today either

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First off, this thread was here right when I needed it today. So, thanks!

 

 

 

I am dealing with the rollercoaster of emotions that my ex is experiencing while he is dealing with depression--I'm along for the ride. We were headed toward reconciliation, but now he feels like he just can't deal with the relationship because he is barely managing himself. I am trying so hard to be accepting and empathetic, but it is difficult for me at times because I truly just can't put myself in his shoes. You are really walking in the shoes of your ex now, and I'm so sorry to hear that. I hate to hear that you have to go through those things, but I'm glad that you are recognizing it. Do what you can to take care of yourself. You yourself know that you likely aren't in a position to be with him right now, so try not to focus too much on the fling. When you are in a better place, you both decide if a relationship between you is right.

 

Again, thanks for this thread. I couldn't deal with today either

 

I'm sorry you are dealing with a depressed partner. It's no fun.

 

Sending you love and light.

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I am literally going through the same thing. I could have written your post, D. My boyfriend got so depressed after going to court with his ex and him feeling like he can't take on me and my kids right now and that he can't give me the life I want.. Financial problems. He said it's all just too much for him. It is so SO hard. I have to believe and trust that there is a reason God / universe or whatever / is taking him out of my life and there is a better plan.

I can't see what it is right now because I'm still so so hurt. I'm grieving with you.

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I am literally going through the same thing. I could have written your post, D. My boyfriend got so depressed after going to court with his ex and him feeling like he can't take on me and my kids right now and that he can't give me the life I want.. Financial problems. He said it's all just too much for him. It is so SO hard. I have to believe and trust that there is a reason God / universe or whatever / is taking him out of my life and there is a better plan.

I can't see what it is right now because I'm still so so hurt. I'm grieving with you.

 

It's awful. I feel your pain. And you are correct.... it is SO HARD.

 

I'm sorry u are hurting. I wish I could take the pain away and blink and make it better for you. I really do. Sending you a (((hug))

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You sound really down and depressed, have you considered therapy or counselling to gain some perspective?

 

I am. Please understand that while I am coping with the loss of my soulmate, I am also going through a viscous divorce and working in a hostile environment at a job I can't quit right now because I have to support my child and the income is essential.

 

Counsel has helped me get out of bed. Two months ago... I was in bed and couldn't leave the house. I lost 27lbs in less than two months because I couldn't eat. I am doing much better than I seem.

 

This is a process. I am doing the best I can. Counsel helped me find this forum and encouraged me to come out of my shell and share with others. I was against it, but she was right. It has helped.

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Friday night is the worst for me. My kids are gone to their dads and my house is so quiet. I talked to a friend and that helped. But going to bed without him to talk to.. it's like I'm missing my soul mate, best friend and a piece of me. This hurts but I know it will get better and hurt a little bit less every day.

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Friday night is the worst for me. My kids are gone to their dads and my house is so quiet. I talked to a friend and that helped. But going to bed without him to talk to.. it's like I'm missing my soul mate, best friend and a piece of me. This hurts but I know it will get better and hurt a little bit less every day.

 

You and I share similar situations. Last weekend my kid was with his father. I was a mess. I hate sleeping without him and not talking to him. We had arranged our custody so our weekends without the kids would be the same. 😔 ugh! .... I remember when he called me and asked me what my days and times were so he could ask for the same days and times so we could have the kids together at the same time and have our free time match up. I almost cried. I was so happy.

 

Now I feel like YUCK

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For me this isn't truly NC... I am just committed to not being in touch with him again at all unless he wants to reconcile. This isn't a 30day or 90day, it's just how my life is now.

 

For the record...I hate it.

 

I can't sleep. I cry all the time. Can't eat ....

 

I miss my Love. 😔

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Today was a bad day. It's been 5 months since he ended it and moved back in with his ex-wife. I recognize all of the negative around his actions. He turned his back on the future he had said he wanted with me. He shut me out, he cut off all contact. But I still love him and I miss him terribly. He and I were so easy together. We just clicked from day one. I was always able to be myself around him. We were always laughing and never had one fight. Life got in the way a bit but he kept assuring me we were on the same page. The ending was just so sudden and out of the blue for me. I wish I could see him, talk to him. On the other hand, I wish I could get angry at him for what he has done. I think that would help me move forward.

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Today was a bad day. It's been 5 months since he ended it and moved back in with his ex-wife. I recognize all of the negative around his actions. He turned his back on the future he had said he wanted with me. He shut me out, he cut off all contact. But I still love him and I miss him terribly. He and I were so easy together. We just clicked from day one. I was always able to be myself around him. We were always laughing and never had one fight. Life got in the way a bit but he kept assuring me we were on the same page. The ending was just so sudden and out of the blue for me. I wish I could see him, talk to him. On the other hand, I wish I could get angry at him for what he has done. I think that would help me move forward.

 

I am sending u love and light.

 

This sounds devastating. I'm so sorry he hurt you.

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Hi D and sorry to hear your going through it at this time.

 

All we can do is share thoughts and feelings and I think you maybe suffering from depression also, due to what your going through. The low feelings and tears, you may want to run it by your doctor and see what they think

 

In the meantime, sending hugs ((())) xxx

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Hi D and sorry to hear your going through it at this time.

 

All we can do is share thoughts and feelings and I think you maybe suffering from depression also, due to what your going through. The low feelings and tears, you may want to run it by your doctor and see what they think

 

In the meantime, sending hugs ((())) xxx

 

I am depressed. Seeing counselor. Dr gave me a low level med to help me. Three weeks ago I couldn't get out of bed....so I've improved.

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I've been returning to obsessive thoughts about my ex with the other woman and how she's his "the one" and how he fell in love so fast with her after just meeting her. I cry when I think about it. I can snap out of it more easily now but it still hurts a lot. I just want to fully accept this and move on. But I'm on this limbo before going to the new country where I feel that my life is on hold and I can't focus on my studies like I should. My ego keeps thinking I lost. I know I didn't, but it's just how I feel when I get into my obsessive thoughts. And I feel bad for being so angry when he didn't do anything specifically wrong with me and was kind with me while "breaking my heart", he just made a choice that was in his right. I just feel that for him is just that easy and him being worried about my feelings makes it worse because it's like he's so well and happy trying to help a friend (me) and it makes me feel like crap because I still can't see him as a friend. I'm on no contact but I still feel this.

 

Anyway, I'm very sorry for what you're going through. It's a roller coaster of emotions until it gets better and I'm sure it will.

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