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Found a guy sending my girlfriend inappropriate pictures. Take a step back?


jmann45

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I've posted on here before about my girlfriend about wanting to go to some parties and I was insecure about that. I received excellent feedback and followed the advice I received. Everything is okay.

 

But today, we were hanging out and I was switching music tracks through her phone which was connected to Bluetooth. As I was doing this, she received a Snapchat picture from some guy, I didn't open it, but I clicked on it to see the previous convo between them two.

 

His previous message said "here's something special for your birthday (;" and there was a picture that had been opened by my girlfriend which was not visible to me. (That's how Snapchat works). I laughed and asked her who this guy was and she took the phone out of my hands and said "just an old friend" and I just gave her a weird look. Eventually after me acting kind of quiet for the next few minutes she told me that it was a guy from about 4 years ago who recently confessed to her that he likes her. And as far as I've known, he's sent her 2 innapropriate pics.

 

There's also another guy who she said she never responds to but he's also always doing the same thing. She told me about him a couple months ago. But she says that she's asked him to please stop and he doesn't listen. She thinks he just sends them out to multiple guys.

 

I told her I didn't feel too good on the fact that she's getting those types of pictures. I want to think that she's entertaining these guys back, which is why they keep coming back. I told her that it's best if we took a step back. She declined and we argued for a bit and she basically promised me that she isn't responding to these guys.

 

I never asked her to block them but isn't that what she should be doing? At the end, we had some good sex and she told me that she's not entertaining any other guys whether she's receiving messages from them or not. I don't know what to believe.

 

The recent guy from today, I think, had kissing emoji next to his name. Snapchat puts emojis next to peoples names ranking them on how many times you have snap chatted back and forth. A kissy face emoji I believe is a few times back and forth on pictures. I just don't know what to do from here. Please tell me what you guys would do.

 

Today I left her place on good terms. We're still technically in a relationship.

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I can't remember how long you said you guys have been together, but if it's been longer than a few months, I'd tell her to figure out where appropriate relationship boundaries are right now or get lost.

 

It's only been 2 months. I don't want to have to "tell" her anything. Because if I say something like you suggested, I know she'll listen. But it will be because I told her to, not because she used her own common sense. And I would hate to put a sense of pressure on her throughout the rest of the relationship. However long that may be.

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What do you mean by inappropriate pictures? Are these guys with their shirts off? Or are they sending her pictures of their penises? Because if she hasn't blocked them for sending c*ck pics then something is up.

 

Yea they're pics. She said she doesn't think anything of them.

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you're right, she should have blocked them. so i too wouldn't be asking her to block them.

 

i would conclude i have all the info i need to make my decision. men send her innapropriate texts and she does nothing to stop it, because she isn't bothered by it.

 

She like the attention and is disrespecting you. Her attention seeking is more important than you, and she is emotionally cheating.

 

Have some respect for yourself and end this.

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If you don't say something then you literally look like a doormat. There's a difference between being controlling and standing up for yourself. I mean, it should be pretty clear that being in a relationship means that d*ck pics are not okay. Apparently she's not too worried about being respectful to you.

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If you don't say something then you literally look like a doormat. There's a difference between being controlling and standing up for yourself. I mean, it should be pretty clear that being in a relationship means that d*ck pics are not okay. Apparently she's not too worried about being respectful to you.

 

I did say something about it today. I said let's take a step back. And she got very worried and sad. She said that this has been one of the worst birthdays and said that it wasn't even her fault. She said that no matter what, she's going to receive pics from random guys. But she doesn't entertain them or respond to them.

 

I remember seeing his opened message on her Snapchat and she hadn't replied to it. It had just been "opened". But who is to say that she didn't text him after and delete the texts.

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It's pretty obvious she loves the attention from other guys. Not sure why she didn't block them and kept them on her Social Media. If some dude sends me those types of photos, I would have blocked and delete immediately. It's only been 2 months, everything should be peachy not having this type of drama. I say cut your losses, if it's like this after 2 months, not sure how it would be like in 1 year from now.

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It's only been 2 months. I don't want to have to "tell" her anything. Because if I say something like you suggested, I know she'll listen. But it will be because I told her to, not because she used her own common sense. And I would hate to put a sense of pressure on her throughout the rest of the relationship. However long that may be.

 

You shouldn't have to tell her how to handle this, yet obviously she's choosing not to use common sense, along with an extreme lack of maturity.

 

In any event, she knows exactly what she's doing. Rather than trying to raise a child, I'd simply walk.

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I did say something about it today. I said let's take a step back. And she got very worried and sad. She said that this has been one of the worst birthdays and said that it wasn't even her fault. She said that no matter what, she's going to receive pics from random guys. But she doesn't entertain them or respond to them.

 

I remember seeing his opened message on her Snapchat and she hadn't replied to it. It had just been "opened". But who is to say that she didn't text him after and delete the texts.

 

I'm all for personal autonomy. I'm non-monogamous and have no issues with my partners loving, sleeping with and being committed to other people. But even the most openly sexual openly romantic folks I know don't keep unsolicited d*ck pics. Why would see stay connected to someone who keeps sending unasked for pictures of his junk when I can block him in a few clicks? And I like d*ck pics!

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only 2 months in and she's already disrespecting your relationship. if she doesn't see anything wrong with it, she isn't going to block them even if you ask her to. when i am in a relationship i don't even pay attention to other guys let alone receive nasty pictures from them...

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I did say something about it today. I said let's take a step back. And she got very worried and sad. She said that this has been one of the worst birthdays and said that it wasn't even her fault. She said that no matter what, she's going to receive pics from random guys. But she doesn't entertain them or respond to them.

 

I remember seeing his opened message on her Snapchat and she hadn't replied to it. It had just been "opened". But who is to say that she didn't text him after and delete the texts.

 

As long as she accepts them, she approves of them, and likes them! If some dude sent me a pic, they would be blocked. Period.

 

Where is your self respect!

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She just messaged me saying that she's sorry for today and that she knows her loyalty remains only to me. And she said that it rips her heart apart when I act different, and she wishes that we can continue this relationship and she wishes that I can continue trusting her. She said that if I wish to still take a step back, that I can and she would completely understand why. But she wishes that I wouldn't.

 

I just want to reply to her at this point saying ,

 

Why the FUUUUjdj don't you just block them?! That's the solution to this whole problem. I haven't replied yet.

 

Any tips would be appreciated.

 

She just posted on her Snapchat saying that I'm the best boyfriend ever and it's a picture of the balloons I got her. It's visible to everyone who is allowed to view her story on Snapchat.

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I read everyone's replies and advice, but right after I read it, I received these messages from her. Which is making me second guess.

 

She did vent to me yesterday saying that she is always in fear that I might find someone new and leave her for them. Could it be that through this fear, she wants to keep these guys around in case I leave ?

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I read everyone's replies and advice, but right after I read it, I received these messages from her. Which is making me second guess.

 

She did vent to me yesterday saying that she is always in fear that I might find someone new and leave her for them. Could it be that through this fear, she wants to keep these guys around in case I leave ?

 

she sounds insecure and uses attention from guys for validation.

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What does it have to do with anything. I think that she is full of sh*t.

 

She should be insulted that men are sending these to her, not considering future bfs.

 

Dude, is that what you want, a girl that always has men in the wings? I have to ask what attracts you to this type of personality? It doesn't sound like you value yourself?

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I'm not sure what to do. Before I left her place today, she gave me her phones password too.

 

But not like I'm ever going to pick up her phone to go through it. That's extremely insecure looking on my part.

 

She should just block them. I want to break up with her tonight but before I do, I want to say that "the simple solution would have been to block them. But the fact that it's not common sense to you and the fact that I had to actually say it tonight, it's too late. Good luck in your future relationships".

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