Buying a house and retirement

Retirement has been weighing heavily on mine and my husband's mines . In the grand scheme of life it's only 12 years away for him and 10 for me. Really that's kind of a blink an eye . He wants to stay in this location but I am undecided . Buying a house back home will be out of reach in 12 years. It might be over $1 million by then . My husband wants to buy here which is much cheaper. After retirement my husband has a better chance of finding employment here as well as he plans to work after retirement . But it's not about us but in an effort to protect our son . My fear is that there will be nothing here for him to do . It is a pretty Podunk town of 19,000. Back home offers a lot more opportunity but not enough security .

We are just so torn on how to make the best decisions for him .

Am I correct that your son has Aspergers? 19,000 is a decent sized town, what kinds of things does your son like or need to do?

Hubby and I have taken early retirement, sold our farm, moved to southern Ontario from the snow belt. Very happy here. We have an online biz to keep us occupied as well as bring in the bucks.

Am I correct that your son has Aspergers? 19,000 is a decent sized town, what kinds of things does your son like or need to do?

 

Hubby and I have taken early retirement, sold our farm, moved to southern Ontario from the snow belt. Very happy here. We have an online biz to keep us occupied as well as bring in the bucks.

There is nothing here pretty much . There is very little to zero employment unless you want to join the military . Yes, he has Asperger's. He's going to college now but wants to leave his program and he's very definite about that . His day consists of going to school and spending the absolute rest of it in his room . Literally. On Saturday he goes to one cardplaying club and on Sunday he goes to another one and then the rest of his day is in his room . ( anime playing card games) other than school this is what he likes period end of story . He would like a chance to work but as I've said the chance of finding in a job in this town next to nothing . If the military wasn't based here they wouldn't even be a town here . I see absolutely no opportunity for him here whatsoever . Back home in an area of approximately 5 million people much more opportunity . But far far less financial security . Everything we have would be left to him in our will and overseen by an adult protector for him .

I would like to say to we have been told by professionals he has absolutely no chance of working unless it's something he's crazy enthused about . Even then he would need a lot of support . Not due to any intellectual disability but due to the fact that his processing speed and frustration are such he is incredibly easy to overwhelm .

We want a home for him where he has absolutely no chance of being thrown out .

I think it would be better for your son in the long run to retire to a bigger city with more resources within reach. Does you son care about relocation?

Wait, he wants to leave his program at college? Why? What does he intend to do instead?

I think it would be better for your son in the long run to retire to a bigger city with more resources within reach. Does you son care about relocation?

Given his own devices he would never move anywhere ever. Any change drives him right around the bend .

Wait, he wants to leave his program at college? Why? What does he intend to do instead?

He said he no longer has any interest in it whatsoever. He wants to write creatively but I don't think they have that at his college it's a technical college . Not only that his paragraphs are 4 sentences long . Spoken language he's very exceptional , written down he suffers greatly . He has a written communication disability that's quite severe .

I believe you are in Canada, but in the US there are many, many programs that help people with all sorts of intellectual and emotional challenges find work.

My cousin, who has Down's Syndrome, lives in a group home affiliated with one of those organizations. He loves it! Several times a week there are outings such as bowling or a zoo visit or sports. They arrange for jobs for them (sorry, I can't recall exactly what job he has but I believe it is in retail in some capacity). I see photos and I can't get over the huge smiles and how much fun they all seem to be having. He even asks his family to come later or on a different day to visit if there's some activity scheduled that he doesn't want to miss.

Could you arrange for him to find employment through an organization? They may be able to find him work that is compatible with his abilities.

And if he dislikes change, how would he feel about a house move?

My boyfriend did a lot of creative writing classes in college, it was his minor. It takes a lot to be good at creative writing, let alone make a living out of it. My high school pal has her degree in creative writing and to pay the bills while she is working on works that she is actually excited about, she pens erotica/romance novels. She doesn't enjoy it but it pays the bills.

I'll be blunt - if he is not going to pursue a field that has meaningful employment, then he's not likely to find a job he can stick with, given that he only wants to work at something within his interests. He may very well need to be on disability income. And he qualifies, right?

I don't see the point in staying in a bustling city for him, and forging house ownership, if he's unlikely to ever have a job. Even in a very full city, what are the job prospects for him in his field of interest if he doesn't have a degree or a technical certificate? I'm willing to bet not much. He also stays in his room all day so it doesn't sound like he gets much out of being in a city.

It's just my two cents, so feel free to disregard if you feel off base, but I would take the cheaper house in the podunk area. Would cost of living be low too? Look at this way, you could get him acclimated to the house, and then when you and your husband are gone, you will leave him a house (paid off) and a nest egg for an adult overseer to manage for him.

Would the utilities be affordable? With oversight and government checks, he could very well stay in the house for many, many, many years to come, long after you are gone.

Again, just my two cents. My sister lives at home with my folks and she has autism. I know that you want him to someday get a job and support himself at least partially and maybe that is still possible but it is also possible that it won't happen. If he goes from interest to interest and is unable to get a degree or certificate, then I don't see many opportunities for him in the work force.

He is already on a disability pension . I would take too that he's only 19 so not many 19-year-olds really know what they want to do you know what I mean ?

No ,cost-of-living is not really cheaper here other than cheaper house price. We still pay the same food prices , same utility prices etc. The only thing that is cheaper the price of the house .

I have tried to get through to him that this is not going to be the way he makes money but he's insistent so I guess he's going to learn the hard way . Some people have to learn the hard way, Lord knows I did.

But yes, if we buy here and eventually when we pass away our life insurance would fully pay out the home and he would have money for many years to come .

He said he no longer has any interest in it whatsoever. He wants to write creatively but I don't think they have that at his college it's a technical college . Not only that his paragraphs are 4 sentences long . Spoken language he's very exceptional , written down he suffers greatly . He has a written communication disability that's quite severe .

Could he use a program like DragonSpeak? He would dictate, and the program writes it for him.

Could he use a program like DragonSpeak? He would dictate, and the program writes it for him.

He used it in Highschool and hates it beyond comprehension. I can't even get him to use it again .

We did meet with a realtor yesterday and soon to meet with a broker to talk about options. This area is a new an upcoming area for retirees from the city so almost nothing to buy so we shall see.

Are you learning towards staying in the smaller area and buying a house there?

Are you learning towards staying in the smaller area and buying a house there?

Yes. We won't be able to even afford homes back home by then . If this housing boom continues homes back home will be about $1 million by the time we retire .