Why can't I attract good guys?

Alright I've had this happening to me more than once now and I am frustrated about it...I just happen see a guy and feel I like him and turns out to be

...He's married or in a relationship already...

Once one of them even lied to me...pretending not to be so and I felt bad that I thought he was worth the time....

I always have this happening to me...Why do I end up attracting the wrong guys... Or are the good guys all dead!!!

I feel like I should just give up on the whole thing...

What's the common denominator in where/how you're meeting these blokes?

Sorry this is frustrating but good on you for not abandoning your standards!

I know exactly how you feel. It's awfull to find out that they have SO (or as in one of my particular examples - became pregnant in the meantime).

But honestly,all you can do is go through background check. Fb is your good friend here (though it didnt help in "the pregnant" case).

Just be patient,somebody worthy will come along.

It sounds more like you're attracted to them rather than "you're attracting them". A good filter allows you to shut down "in a relationship", "just got out of a relationship" and "not ready for a relationship" asap.

I just happen see a guy and feel I like him and turns out to be ...He's married or in a relationship already...Why do I end up attracting the wrong guys... Or are the good guys all dead!!!

All the good guys i know are married or they are much older men whos wife has passed. Even some not so great guys are married.

You don't attract the wrong men. You accept the wrong men.

It sounds more like you're attracted to them rather than "you're attracting them". A good filter allows you to shut down "in a relationship", "just got out of a relationship" and "not ready for a relationship" asap.

Totally agree! You are the common denominator.

Are you attracted to smooth talkers, and people who are familiar too soon? Perhaps, they are telling you early on that they have great feelings for you and see a future.

You need to address the type of guys YOU are attracted to!

Alright I've had this happening to me more than once now and I am frustrated about it...I just happen see a guy and feel I like him and turns out to be

 

...He's married or in a relationship already...

 

Once one of them even lied to me...pretending not to be so and I felt bad that I thought he was worth the time....

 

I always have this happening to me...Why do I end up attracting the wrong guys... Or are the good guys all dead!!!

 

I feel like I should just give up on the whole thing...

Yep all the good men are dead Jokes aside, I'm not sure, how are you meeting these guys? I would suggest trying some paid online dating sites because I think guys who are already married or in a relationship and just want sex on the side would probably not want to pay for sites. Also on their profile have a good look at what they specified their relationship status is. I mean some people still lie but that's not your fault if they're lying. I think just don't be too trusting as well and if you get any gut feeling that something is wrong/dodgy, it most likely is. You can usually tell if someone is being dishonest or evasive and if you get any sense of that, then ask the guy what is going on and if you're not getting good explanations then just dump them. Also have you tried to meet guys that your friends, family or colleagues actually know? Like they should know if people in their circles are married or not?

I hear you!! I'm unsuccessfully dating myself!! I do think there are a lot of good guys out there though, it just takes a while to find them and you have to go through bad matches sometimes before you get a good match. I think that the key is that you have to get rid of the ones quickly when you find out they're already in a relationship or have some other significant deal-breaker. I've had a few guys tell me on Tinder after a few messages that they are unhappily married. I tell them right then and there to go to counseling with their wife or to get divorced, but I have no interest in messing around with a married man. Goodbye.

Also have you tried to meet guys that your friends, family or colleagues actually know? Like they should know if people in their circles are married or not?

I like that idea...But I don't know I guess I don't have that big of a social circle...

All the good guys i know are married or they are much older men whos wife has passed. Even some not so great guys are married.

So Is that supposed to mean. One can't find a good guy...Or I should be looking for someone near to good... ??

So Is that supposed to mean. One can't find a good guy...Or I should be looking for someone near to good... ??

No. Do not not listen to this negative talk. There are a lot of good guys out there.

Star, have you tried Meetups, volunteering, hobbies that have clubs etc....?

I think that you are attracted to men who are unavailable. It's probably because someone close to you was unavailable growing up like your father or some male figure.

This happens to me too. Try dating some guys who you wouldn't normally date and see how that works out.

I bet you'd be surprised that they can be good matches too if you gave them a chance.