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Do depressed exes ever come back or regret their decision?


cleo123

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My ex bf and I were together for a little over a year. Physically, mentally, spiritually we connected on a very deep level. But the last month of our relationship wasnt that amazing as it used to always be, to put it short. Then one day he said he hasn't been that loving to me because he doesn't feel like himself anymore and can't enjoy anything in life and can't make me happy because he's not happy with himself. So then he broke up with me. He says he still loves me but a relationship is too stressful. I tried apologizing and asking him if we can work things out but he refused and says he just needs to find himself on his own. That made me hit rock bottom and I had never seen myself so depressed and desperate, but I just gave him his space. He asked to hang like a week later so we did, but then I told him we can't be friends because it hurts too much and he was crying and disagreeing because he doesn't want to lose me. It's all very confusing and I just want him to be happy again but I really want him as my boyfriend. Has anyone ever had a depressed ex come back and how long? Or have you dumped someone over depression and then regretted it later?? He's not really depressed for a particular reason, he has a lot of friends and a great family structure and he's wealthy. He just stopped enjoying life for no reason. So I'm hoping he will be able to feel like himself soon again. I know I shouldn't wait around for him but I love him dearly and really believe he was my soulmate.

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Sorry to hear this. What happened the last month? Why do feel the need to apologize? Were there arguments?

 

How old is he? Does he just want his freedom? Often 'find myself' is a nice way to say that. Agree he doesn't sound depressed at all and just used variations on the "its me, not you" excuse.

 

Agree hanging out as friends is nonsense. Don't let him string you along. Go no contact so you can heal and reflect.

he doesn't feel like himself anymore and can't enjoy anything in life and can't make me happy because he's not happy with himself.

a relationship is too stressful.

he just needs to find himself on his own.

He asked to hang like a week later so we did

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So things fell out, after about a year- due to him being depressed, etc?

 

Best work on accepting this fact... and work on your letting go & healing. Doesn't sound much like he's in it for the long haul

 

When one is depressed.. it can be dibilitating and yes, they can push others away... don't think you really want something like this in your life.

 

At least he's honest and admitting so.

 

If he does make a come-back.. doesn't mean he won't do this again. is this what you want? Someone this uncertain.. unstable?

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My guess is he wants to keep you around as a backup, otherwise if he truly cared, he wouldn't risk losing you to someone else. "I still love you, but I need to find myself" is a classic excuse often used to politely say, "it's over."

 

He may very well be depressed, but it appears he's using that as an excuse to make his exit. I'm sorry, but I would keep my expectations at a reasonable level.

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  • 2 years later...
Hello. I know it’s been almost 3 years but I’m currently in this dilemma. Please did you and your ex get back? Or did he at least come back around? I’m really desperate to hear back from you. Thanks

 

This OP has not logged onto the forum for almost 2 years.

 

If you want to check on this, you can click on their user name and select "Profile". This will tell you the last time the user was active on this site.

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