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Partner oversleeping


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Hello!

My partner goes away for 3 weeks at a time for work. He got back from work 3 days ago (he has a week off). He slept the first two days home solidly I am all for that. Hard work deserves rest. Now it is the weekend. He's spent 3 hours awake for the whole day and went back to bed. Woke up at 4pm and went back to bed at 7pm. I have the weekend off and haven't spent any time with him in a few weeks and would enjoy his company. I have hobbies, reading, tv I can enjoy while he sleeps but it still feels lonely. I have talked to him about wanting to enjoy our weekend together before he goes away again. He dismisses me. I let him sleep, I do not nag him awake. It's just a little lonely feeling when this happens every time he is home. I don't know if he's extremely exhausted or he is avoiding the day

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being away for weeks at a time and adjusting and readjusting to on/off periods is a nightmare.

 

you're going to have to go through stuff like crazy schedules, mortgages, losing your parents, illness, pregnancy, unemployment or god knows what else if you're in for the long haul. learn to limit things you make a problem out of to at least those a person can actually do something about. he can't force his body into overkill.

 

get your kindle and go read under the covers next to him or something.

 

what kind of work does he do? is this schedule temporary?

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I am only bringing this up because it was last August and I am assuming it is the same man .

 

My boyfriend is a drug addict. He has been through different periods of drug abuse in his life. At times it's very severe, other times it's nothing, sometimes "casual". He has been a user of herion, meth, oxy, crack, etc. He smokes marijuana on a regular basis, drinks socially.

 

Is this the missing link to the story .. is he sleeping because of the drug situation .

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Sounds like it's time for you to get out there and meet people (not date - socialize, do activities, make friends possibly) - your partner's schedule is brutal and I can relate to the extent that I have to solo parent when my husband travels and he sleeps in and works late at night so he's on a different schedule than me and our early-riser child. I've never felt lonely living on my own for 15 years or while married when he's off doing his own thing . I have my own life, friends. acquaintances, activities - do you have volunteer activities you can get involved in?

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I've had different jobs one would be 20hr days back to back sometimes. I understand jetlag. But sleeping for 3 days straight? Is he conan turning the grain mill for 20 years? I only knew 1 person who used to do that and they self medicated and had depression.

 

well that is why I read back and saw the thread about drug addiction .

 

Is he waking up and having a few marleys the size of Russia and then going back to bed ...rinse repeat .

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Yeah, I'd like some follow up as well. I remember temporarily working two full-time jobs, 90 - 100 hours a week. You'd best believe you'd only catch me out of bed to take a dump or heat up some pizza rolls, but I couldn't imagine actually sleeping 20 hours if I were lucky enough to have a day off.

 

Only time I've ever slept that much was last month when my lung collapsed bad and I was high as a kite on morphine.

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No the drug problem isn't as issue. He hasn't used drugs since then. I think he may be avoiding the world

 

I know you know him better then the rest of us , but are you sure ?

 

This was only last August, so what 5 months ago and you said

 

He has started to buy pills (oxy, morphine, Ativan, olanzapine)

 

Despite his promise he took methadone on Saturday and again today. He says its minimal amounts and work is stressful. He says that it's not a problem and that he has it under control.

 

My honest opinion is he is quite literally coming home to sleep off the pills and meth that he takes to get through work .

I just don't buy that he managed to quit all this so easily , his actions are speaking louder then his words .

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Well his drug counsellor and boss give him weekly drug tests (urine or hair sample) that he has passed the last 3 months. That's a lot of assumptions meaning made. No drugs are involved here

 

ok that's fair enough ...yes i made assumptions because I was trying to help you get to the bottom of it and obviously I didn't know that he was getting tested . We can only go by what we are told on here .

 

I have absolutely no idea then other then things like low vitamin b , diabetes , iron problems or just tired from working away .

 

I have being diagnosed with chronic fatigue and M.E but that affects me daily , so I would be reluctant to think it was anything like that because he does work .

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