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Thread: Brain surgery this week!

  1. #71
    sara-pezzini
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    I was very depressed last year and i really didn't care about living anymore but that was partly due to those meds....
    Other than that i get annoyed if i hear people talking about small stuff and how much they get upset by tiny things.
    I am less patient than i was before.
    In the other hand the tumor also brought me a lot, i opened up more than i used to, I'm also very shy and talking to people is hard for me, even at work, but now everyone knows and i can talk to everyone there.
    Friendships deepened and i fell in love with a guy who has been there for me since day 1!

    I don't care at all about the scar or looks or any of that, so that isn't part of my fear....
    But the fact that my brain is exposed and that there are complications possible that have great effects, and the fact that even the surgeon had not done this surgery more than once or twice, that is scary!!

    I think you were kind of obsessing so much over your ex to not have to deal with what was going on with your health, maybe? Cause that we can deal with and feel all our feelings over and then not have to deal with this super scary stuff.....
    Anyways it really sucks to have to deal with 2 of those terrible things at once! But now you're on the other side and can look forward!

  2. #72
    Eyebrows
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    It wasn't just a way of deflecting. I guess there's something about this sort of thing that makes you want to tell people who were important to you how much they meant. After those claims when I was having the second bleed, bearing in mind it's made worse by stress/high blood pressure etc. At the time I didn't care about dying because I felt like the old me had died in Prague and Vienna.

    I did become close to a few other people and some of the people who stepped up were people who I never thought would. It's great that you found someone through the whole ordeal.

    It's scary to think about your brain being exposed. Makes me think of the scientist guy in Nightmare Before Christmas! But the methods and techniques are so sophisticated these days. I relate to the people complaining about little things, though. I find it hard to relate to people sometimes now, I'm just getting used to getting back into small-talk at work which mostly seems to be complaining! I'm shy too though you wouldn't have thought it back before I had the first bleed. I'd grown a lot and it was like being put back to square one.

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  4. #73
    maccerz
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    The very best of luck sara-pezzini! What a brave woman you are. I know I dont know you but you're very much in my thoughts xx

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  6. #74
    sara-pezzini
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    Well still no surgery.
    I called them today and turns out there were more surgeries postponed after me but those were more urgent, so those people go first.
    They don't know much but the surgeon's assistent went to talk to the surgical team for me to find out anything, because this uncertainty is driving me crazy.
    She managed to find out that they aspire to plan my surgery in for the 9th of March....this is not certain yet, just that before this date nothing will happen, that is certain.
    So another huge blow and i was pretty upset.
    It's taking so long! Was supposed to be January 26th, then it'd be over by now and I'd be healing...
    So this sucks big time!
    Had a very bad day yesterday, could barely form sentences, forgot everything, was so bad that even my mom who is used to it by now, was worried.
    And i could barely walk, was so dizzy!
    Today's a little better again.....
    Then again if i had had the surgery in January i probably wouldn't have had a date Saturday and wouldn't have gotten a sweet surprise from him yesterday! So maybe all is as it should be......

  7. #75
    journeynow
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    Aw, Sarah, sorry to hear you're still in limbo with the surgery. (Well, if there's a bright side, just think, they'll be that much more experienced if they do the other surgeries before yours. Right? You want them at their very best!)

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  9. #76
    mines
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    So sorry about this Sara that is a long time to wait, I feel so badly for you, ugh. I'm sending you all my positive energy, that the Universe conspires so there are no further delays. You are such a sweet and lovely spirit, you really deserve this chance to be set free from the crushing pain. ((hugs)) and healing energy coming your way.

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  11. #77
    sara-pezzini
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    Thank you both!
    It's so hard all this waiting! Sadly he won't be more experienced cause the surgery he has to do with me doesn't happen much. He's only done this combo of MVD with a tumor once or twice cause it's extremely rare, but it was a funny thought hahaha
    I just think there must be a reason....Maybe then i get to stay in a single bedroom as i really really want and maybe that wouldn't happen otherwise.
    In the meantime I'm having a lot of fun with my crush, this wouldn't happen any time soon otherwise cause I'd be healing.
    So maybe it is for a reason.
    But still sucks though!
    I want this done and see if it helps and be done with the meds I'm taking....and no more pain....
    Meanwhile im also very curious what the tumor has done since radiation and that scan also keeps getting postponed

  12. #78
    ~Seraphim ~
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    Aaagggggghhh!!! So frustrating!!!!

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