now imagine if this was an 18 year old girl (who will certainly grow and change plenty with time), and a 40 something man. Presuming he isn't emotionally stunted in ways that render him abusive (or creepy, as this thread puts it), i guess it can be a symbiotic relationship...for a while. dependency...but devoid of the malicious aspect (setting myslef up for many a poster's rage here, but i am fairly certain most of what people call healthy relationships are just acceptable forms of dependency-- a word that gets thrown around like an insult around here btw). a girl looking for wisdom and direction, a man looking for a persona untainted by the struggles of being Someone Great/Important or whatever the hell it is the years do to us.I found from a man's point of view - women can change a lot at that age. As a matter of fact, I'm still friends (loosely) with her now. And she's unrecognisable from the woman I dated,
The trick is precisely that...the child may grow up. The somehow stunted adult...if he does grow up...the infantile innocence may lose the appeal for him, leaving a vacancy for seasoned partners. If he doesn't...well, that leaves a vacancy for...a new child.
but then again... don't we often part ways because one or the other outgrows the relationship anyway.
echoing the fair warning though. i have a hard time imagining a 40 something taking benign romantic interest in an 18 year old. certainly, if they do, fat chance of coming across them...on OLD of all places.