Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 8 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 71

Thread: My family is psychotic and I don't know what to do anymore

  1. #11
    RainyCoast
    Platinum Member RainyCoast's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    4,039
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    3187
    it is simply rude to not even bother with paragraphs when nicely asked. some ppl also have eye and neuro problems that make reading blocks of text difficult for them, though they would very much like to be helpful.

    in addition, the posters who have been turned off not merely by the unbroken text but also your replies were responders who give very good advice, especially on trauma and individuation-- both of which relate to your concern. when asking for help, simply being respectful goes a long way.

    i too haven't gotten far with reading, but what is clear is there is no way you can count on having a semi-decent life with any of your family. they are beyond abusive. i don't recommend waiting on your boyfriend's family finances to improve so that they can take you in. try getting help living self-sufficiently rather than help living dependently on someone yet again.

    i recommend going to your local social sevices. a social worker in direct services helps you with practical arrangements you need to get housing and live on your own, and one in clinical social work will offer counseling, any guidance required in addressing the circumstance that cause you distress, and can handle reports againts your family-- which you should file. i am not generally in favor of purely vindictive moves, but your family's behavior has me doubting they're not going to harm more people at some point.

    of course the social services offer significantly less help if your financial situation allows you to live on your own (you can still use clinical social services though).

    if your business isn't lucrative enough to allow you to support yourself, looking for a different job and relying on public transit would be a necessity.

  2. Thanks qwaspolk82, FlashEng1 thanked for this post
  3. #12
    qwaspolk82
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Posts
    678
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    323
    Quote Originally Posted by MissAndromeda [Register to see the link]
    It's pretty clearly written. I didn't want to make it any longer than it had to be by insterting paragraph breaks. If you seriously can't read it just because there aren't paragraph breaks, then don't even bother commenting.
    Well someone broke it up into paragraphs.

    It was very, very long and hard to read. It was jumbled and not clearly written. I had to read it a few times. If you can't see that then I'm not sure what to say. I actually skimmed the last 1/4 of it. Also you can't really tell people not to comment. It's a public forum.

  4. #13
    qwaspolk82
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Posts
    678
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    323
    Quote Originally Posted by MissAndromeda [Register to see the link]
    If you're honestly more concerned with paragraph breaks than giving advice, don't comment. And if you only read part of it, don't comment either. It's clearly written and all the spelling is correct. Paragraph breaks do add length, considering you have to click the return/enter button to do so. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to read a clearly written entry. This is a forum, not a novel.
    If you don't like the replies you're getting then don't reply back.

    Paragraph breaks do NOT add length on THIS forum. On a word document it might push it to another page. On here no it doesn't as you can clearly see it's been broken up and it did not add length.

    Well you wrote a novel...and if you are going to be so combative you won't get any advice. I am beginning to doubt your story in all reality if you're THIS combative about someone politely suggesting you break up your story.

  5. #14
    dias
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    769
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    319
    I guess the only solution, as already been said, is to move to a big city and find a job there. Easier said than done, but it seems the only choice you have.

  6. #15
    MissAndromeda
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Posts
    31
    Thanked
    1
    Quote Originally Posted by RainyCoast [Register to see the link]
    it is simply rude to not even bother with paragraphs when nicely asked. some ppl also have eye and neuro problems that make reading blocks of text difficult for them, though they would very much like to be helpful.

    in addition, the posters who have been turned off not merely by the unbroken text but also your replies were responders who give very good advice, especially on trauma and individuation. when asking for help, simply being respectful goes a long way.

    i too haven't gotten far with reading, but what is clear is there is no way you can count on having a semi-decent life with any of your family. they are beyond abusive. i don't recommend waiting on your boyfriend family's finances to improve so that they can take you in. try getting help living self-sufficiently rather than help living dependently on someone yet again.

    i recommend going to your local social sevices. a social worker in direct services helps you with practical arrangements you need to get housing and live on your own, and one in clinical social work will offer counseling, any guidance required in addressing the circumstance that causes you distress, and can handle reports againts your family-- which you should file. i am not generally in favor of purely vindictive moves, but your family's behavior has me doubting they're not going to harm more people at some point.

    of course the social services offer significantly less help if your financial situation allows you to live on your own (you can still use clinical social services though).

    if your business isn't lucrative enough to allow you to support yourself, looking for a different job and relying on public transit would be a necessity.
    I haven't been rude to anyone. I simply said that if you're more concerned with the lack of paragraph breaks, then don't comment. It's discouraging to put something out there, trying to get some suggestions on what I should do about my situation, and the majority are more concerned with paragraphs. I didn't say I wasn't going to fix it, but it takes a minute to do so, as it is pretty long already.

    I hadn't thought of going to social services yet, so thank you for the suggestion. I will definitely look into it and see if anything like that is available around here. Public transportation isn't really an option, as we don't have anything like that here. It's an extremely small town, so there isn't a whole lot to work with.

    As far as money goes, after I pay my bills that I have to pay, I barely have anything left. So I'm definitely not making as much as I would like to. I'm trying to get another job as soon as I possibly can to try and fix that.

  7. #16
    qwaspolk82
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Posts
    678
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    323
    Quote Originally Posted by MissAndromeda [Register to see the link]
    I haven't been rude to anyone. I simply said that if you're more concerned with the lack of paragraph breaks, then don't comment. It's discouraging to put something out there, trying to get some suggestions on what I should do about my situation, and the majority are more concerned with paragraphs. I didn't say I wasn't going to fix it, but it takes a minute to do so, as it is pretty long already.

    I hadn't thought of going to social services yet, so thank you for the suggestion. I will definitely look into it and see if anything like that is available around here. Public transportation isn't really an option, as we don't have anything like that here. It's an extremely small town, so there isn't a whole lot to work with.

    As far as money goes, after I pay my bills that I have to pay, I barely have anything left. So I'm definitely not making as much as I would like to. I'm trying to get another job as soon as I possibly can to try and fix that.
    You have been extremely rude to people who suggested you break up your paragraphs - which was done anyway.

    You got suggestions but you're obviously ignoring them.

  8. Thanks Hollyj thanked for this post
  9. #17
    mustlovedogs
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    2,084
    Thanked
    1864
    Quote Originally Posted by MissAndromeda [Register to see the link]
    I didn't say I wasn't going to fix it, but it takes a minute to do so, as it is pretty long already.
    Just throwing this out there - if you don't want to spend the time improving your post due to its length, why would people want to read?

    It's a useful exercise to translate your thoughts into other people's thoughts as well. If you find it long, the readers will, too. If it's long, how can you improve readership and response rate?

    This advice isn't just for ENA, but in life - if you're asking for help or advice, what small things can you do to make it easier for others to help you?

  10. #18
    RainyCoast
    Platinum Member RainyCoast's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    4,039
    Gender
    Female
    Thanked
    3187
    they may at least be able to provide housing, perhaps even in a different town so you can look for a job there. you'll need your bank statements, and save any and all receipts so that it's evident your expenses exceed your earnings.

    i read the rest of it and the only thing i'd like to add is there is no "reasoning" with abusive people. you will never be "right" with them.

    maybe also look up a safe house, but they can be low on capacities, especially this time of year.

    can you set up a camera to record some of it? you never know when that may come in handy.

    quaspolk, the original post shows up edited on your end? it doesn't on mine, it's still a block.

  11. Thanks mustlovedogs thanked for this post
  12. #19
    Wiseman2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    22,427
    Gender
    Male
    Thanked
    16618
    Unless you are making money and paying for your upkeep, it's not a "real job". You do need counselling if you endured all the abuse you claim your family inflicted.

    So go to social services and they will help you with food stamps, job searches, medicaid and getting housing and many other resources. You can't bounce around crashing at relatives, friends, bfs or whatever. You need a place to live and a job, not couch-surfing and no income.
    Quote Originally Posted by MissAndromeda [Register to see the link]
    I currently have a job running my own marketing business and work with other businesses which, according to my parents and my aunt, isn't a "real job." I am nearly 21 years old.I told her that I didn't need counseling and she replied with, "Yes, you do. You have mental issues." I have been forced to go to counselor after counselor all of my life by my parents, and now my aunt is trying to do the same thing.

  13. #20
    j.man
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    7,488
    Thanked
    9074
    She edited into paragraphs and then consciously edited back into a single block. Pretty funny.

    Granted, each paragraph was big enough to be its own short story and it looked like she more or less played pin the tail on the donkey to see where to put in some white space, but even the baby effort was appreciated.

  14. Thanks FlashEng1 thanked for this post
  15.  

Page 2 of 8 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Top Threads
How should I kick my mother out when the time comes?
My mother currently lives with me and my girlfriend and she is aware that in another year my girlfriend and I want to make some big life changes and
Trying to hold my new family together
I had a baby 6.5 weeks ago, me and the father live together, broke up a month ago, but kinda together now, well, I've agreed to stay and try so's not
An update on my last thread about my mom having affairs.
So I hd written a long paragraph about my mum having affairs on the last thread. So according to majority of the advises that I received I stayed
This wedding is tearing my family apart
My sister is getting married to her boyfriend of 2 years, and it's been tearing everyone apart. Honestly, I'm not even sure where to begin on this
Just want some advice and help
I am 19 and my boyfriend is 25, we have been dating for over a year now and I went away to college while he stayed home so a lot of it was long
I'm starting to realize that my mother will need to live with me for a while
My mother lives with me and my girlfriend now. The plans my girlfriend and I had before my mother moved in was to set things up so that she, my

Expert Advice
Featured Threads
Where do you draw the line? GF's and guy friends
[SIZE=3][FONT=Helvetica]Hey guys, need some quick help on this one. Please help [/FONT] [FONT=Helvetica] [/FONT] [FONT=Helvetica]Yesterday my GF says
OMG he has a wedding date.
All, A couple of years ago, I dated a guy. There were things that were amazing but also horrible. A little over a year ago, we reconnected. He
HELPPP!!! Boyfriend broke up with me out of the blue
hi. REALLY REALLY NEED SOME ADVICE AND HELP. my boyfriend recently broke up with me out of the blue and we were dating for 2.5 years. everything was
Why does this bother me so much?
Hey guys. So gf of 7 years has left me for another guy again long story short and some of you know the long. So I did the unhealthy habit of looking
My girlfriend of 3 years just told me she is polyamorous
I have no idea how to feel about it. She assured me she didn't want to force it on me and could live monogamously with me but the thought of
Dealing with inconsiderate, selfish people from dawn till dusk.
Not sure if this is posted in the right place, but here it is. Lately my life seems to be about dealing with people who are inconsiderate. From
Toxic relationship // venting
Sometimes writing everything out helps me get a better understanding of certain situations. I'm sorry for the long post, I do want some advice, but
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •