In need of some insight from the ladies

Ladies, I need your input on this girl i just met.

Im affraid of going for too much or not doing anything. Can't read what she wants.

The plot.

We work at the same company, i started 3 years ago and she joined 8 months ago.

We're both civil engineers and project managers, so in all this time weve never met because we were assigned to different projects in different cities, and i only talked with her on the phone 2 times, both in the last month.

Some people had already told me she was gorgeous, absolutely stunning, so i had already checked her Facebook some months ago, were even linked on LinkedIn.

The past weekend we had the company's Christmas Party, so finally I met her in person. She was on my table, two seats from me, and gave me a big smile when she arrived, telling a colleague that she only knew two people from our table (me and a female colleague).

We didn't talk anything the whole dinner and I noticed she was feeling kind of left out, because she is new and doesn't know the majority of the coworkers.

I also noticed that she glanced at me many times during the party.

A couple hours later when most of the people from our table had already left, i went to our table, sat next to her, and we talked for almost 1 hour.

She was super kind, looked me in the eyes, if i reached more towards her she did the same, and she smiled a lot the whole time.

Im currently in a project in the small town she was born and where she goes every weekend, so we had that point of interest to talk.

She told me she didn't work on Monday, and maybe she would stop by to say hello and see what we're building.

Monday comes, I'm super busy at work, it's final day before we finish this project, I'm walking by the road with some colleagues, she stops her car next to me, says me hello and asks where she can park.

I was stunned, never thought she would come.

She parks her car, I go in her direction, she gets out of the car and gives me two kisses.

We were together for 1+ hour, talked a lot, laughed a lot, walked alongside the river near to the location, she told me where she lived, the we said our goodbyes, and she told she would really like to go visit me at other project in involved now, who is in the same city she is currently working.

Since that (three days ago) I did nothing.

Because I don't know if she's into me, or if she's just being friendly and nice, because we work at the same company and share the same position.

She is absolutely great, grown-up, mature, nothing like most girls that I've met recently.

I may also add that She is younger than me (I'm 33, she's 25).

Help me on this: is she interested in me? Am I overthinking this? Should i wait and see if she does anything? Should I do anything?

If I had some assurance that she's into me, I would followup right away. She's one in a million.

Okay I'm gonna give you a bit of a hard time here, just for the hell of it.

Dude are you dense? LOL

This is easy....YES SHE IS INTERESTED.

I would even say VERY interested.

She's going way out of her way to see you (on her day off no less), talks to you for hours, walks around the river with you (how romantic), would like to visit you again, PLUS she kissed you twice!

I am wondering, what else are you expecting her to do? Ask you out?

You need to ask her out.

Have fun!

Lol

She gave me two kisses on the cheek, as a greeting when she arrived.

But that is also a good thing, I guess.

Lol

 

She gave me two kisses on the cheek, as a greeting when she arrived.

But that is also a good thing, I guess.

Is that standard operating procedure at your job?

For people (women) to kiss their male co-workers on the cheek as a greeting? Genuinely curious.

No! No! NO! You are there to work and not use work as a singles bar and a dating scene.

No, i work there for 3 years and never saw anyone giving two kisses as a greeting. It's always a handshake.

That's why I became so confused. And pleased I might add 😄

Im not doing anything like that. We don't even work together, in the same place. Were engineers, project managers, in this line of work usually we only see eachother at company gatherings.

Im not doing anything like that. We don't even work together, in the same place. Were engineers, project managers, in this line of work usually we only see eachother at company gatherings.

Oh right that's ok then. You know how these things can get messy. Well from what you described she's got the hot's from hell. And so yes it's your turn. Do you have her number? I'd be asking her out on a date.

You should find a reason to see her. See where she's staying or something and invite her to drinks or dinner. Then gauge her interest from that meetup and go in for a kiss But right now she's making all the effort so it's time for you to reciprocate.

Ive been in a 14 year relationship since I was 17. That ended 2 years ago.

I have never chased a woman in my life. Never had to need to do it.

Im not used to this dating thing. Cut me some slack 😆

Ive been in a 14 year relationship since I was 17. That ended 2 years ago.

 

I have never chased a woman in my life. Never had to need to do it.

Im not used to this dating thing. Cut me some slack 😆

By never chased, do you mean you have never asked a woman out on a date?

I'm confused.

I wasn't being stern? I was just giving advice on what to do?

Never. My ex did all the work when we started dating.

Im a very confident guy, in my job and everything.

I get along great with women, since I started working I always bonded more with female colleagues than male colleagues (guess it comes from having two older sisters).

But I'm not really used to this whole dating scene. Never did it.

I wasn't being stern? I was just giving advice on what to do?

I know.

I really appreciate your advice, and I think your spot on with what your saying.

What if I followup with a text wishing merry Christmas, and asking for her to come visit me in my new project, close to where she's working?

I don't even know if she's single!

I know.

I really appreciate your advice, and I think your spot on with what your saying.

What if I followup with a text wishing merry Christmas, and asking for her to come visit me in my new project, close to where she's working?

 

I don't even know if she's single!

No, go to her!

Never. My ex did all the work when we started dating.

 

Ive been in a 14 year relationship since I was 17. That ended 2 years ago.

 

So you have not dated at all in the two years since you broke up with your ex?

Or you did, but the women all pursued you, asked you out?

Not judging, just asking.

Maybe he's a babe magnet?

Or you did, but the women all pursued you, asked you out?

So you have not dated at all in the two years since you broke up with your ex?

 

Or you did, but the women all pursued you, asked you out?

 

Not judging, just asking.

Not dated at all.

Took my time, rebuilt my life after she teared it up to pieces, and finally I'm back on track, for the past 6-8 months.

During this time I focused on myself, my job, my family, and I think that was the best thing to do.

After spending half of your life with someone, there aren't any overnight fixes to your grief. It takes time. And cut any contact with someone who hurt you so much.

It is how it is.

Maybe he's a babe magnet?

I wish.

It would be much easier 😆

Not dated at all.

Took my time, rebuilt my life after she teared it up to pieces, and finally I'm back on track, for the past 6-8 months.

 

During this time I focused on myself, my job, my family, and I think that was the best thing to do.

After spending half of your life with someone, there aren't any overnight fixes to your grief. It takes time. And cut any contact with someone who hurt you so much.

 

It is how it is.

Oh I completely understand and think that is smart!

14 years is a long time and if it was a painful breakup (sounds like it was), then you need time to work through grief and get your bearings before dating or becoming emotionally involved with anyone again.

It wouldn't be fair to the woman either.

Unfortunately and sadly, many people become so lonely after being with someone for so long, that they will emotionally latch on to another, just for the sake of having someone.

Then proceed to send mixed messages like telling the person they're confused, don't know what they want or the dreaded "not ready."

Anyway, I am starting to ramble, just wanted to say I think you are smart for waiting.

Now you're ready and it sounds like you really like this girl and she likes you!

She's given you enough signals already that she really likes you, your turn to show her by asking her out.

Completely understand the ltr and the break up.

Since you are not in tune at the moment, I would say go for it. Women don't usually give you all those signals for no reason and the reason you are getting all those signals is because you don't know you are doing so not doing anything is making her attracted to you more.

Just ask her out on a date. Don't say things like "let's go on a date" or "will you.... Maybe we can..... Want to go..." Just be direct, ask when she's free for a drink ... My guess is she will give you a day and you just pick a time, don't mention a place. You can pick her up as she given clear signs that she is comfortable with you and once the date is set don't call her, just show up on time on that day. Don't call before you pick her up. Just act like you know what you are doing. Do avoid movies or any place loud on the first date.

Yes, she's definitely interested if she went out of her way to see you. I do hope you ask her out. Good luck!

Two kisses on the cheek is not flirting. It's basically a handshake with a European twist. I would't read anything into it. Everything else just sounds like a co-worker who likes you. Don't confuse like as interest or attraction. Besides, the last thing in the world you want to do is get involved with a co-worker.

Two kisses on the cheek is not flirting. It's basically a handshake with a European twist. I would't read anything into it. Everything else just sounds like a co-worker who likes you. Don't confuse like as interest or attraction. Besides, the last thing in the world you want to do is get involved with a co-worker.

I do want to get involved with this particular co-worker!

But i think you're right with what you stated before, that's why i haven't made any move.

Guess i will just text her wishing merry christimas in a flirty way, and see what comes out of it.

Two kisses on the cheek is not flirting. It's basically a handshake with a European twist. I would't read anything into it. Everything else just sounds like a co-worker who likes you. Don't confuse like as interest or attraction. Besides, the last thing in the world you want to do is get involved with a co-worker.

Hmmm, I am wondering if you missed where she visited his project on her day off, and they walked around the river for hours talking about anything and everything?

Do you think that is typical co-worker behavior? Male/female? Who only recently met?

I don't think they are "co-workers" per se. Not in the typical sense.

They are both project managers employed with the same company, but do not work together or even interact.

They are each assigned to different projects at different locations.

You could be right I suppose S, we are not mind readers.

I just read her behavior towards him as interest, and after two years, might be time for him to stretch his emotional muscles and ask her for a drink.

Friends ask each other for drinks too, so it doesn't have to be a "date". Just a drink and he will gauge more from that than sending a Merry Christmas text.

Playing it safe never got anyone anywhere ...

Just my $.02 as always.

Best of luck OP no matter what you decide.