n0cturnal Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 Hey all, to cut a long story short: met a guy last week and we hit it off. have been somewhat in contact since, albeit less than before the date - chalked it up to general busyness/no need for him to 'woo' me/he's not as into texting as i am. anyway, we were meant to meet one day this week but i realised i was busy that day so texted him saying i could do the day after if he could? to which he replied "possibly that day ( and since then...nothing. the day in question is friday. i messaged him this weekend and it's been 3 days. do i give up? do i act passive aggressively? do i message to prompt him? any help is much appreciated! Link to comment
SophieGrace Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 I think you let it go and allow him to make the next move. He was being vague in the first text, and in my experience if a guy is interested he will pursue. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 Are you supposed to meet this Friday or last Friday? Sorry, the timeline is confusing. Link to comment
n0cturnal Posted October 26, 2016 Author Share Posted October 26, 2016 oops sorry - this friday Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 You did all you could with a counter offer and his response was "possibly", so the balls in his court. No don't prompt him. i realised i was busy that day so texted him saying i could do the day after if he could? to which he replied "possibly that day ( Link to comment
DancingFool Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 OK, since you cancelled the date that was set up pretty much last minute, either this ship has already sailed because he got too miffed with that or it's on you to actually make plans now to make up for the cancellation. The ball is not in his court but yours. Granted, if you text with "drinks Friday 8 pm at x place, are we on?" and all you get is silence, then assume this ship has indeed sailed. Link to comment
n0cturnal Posted October 26, 2016 Author Share Posted October 26, 2016 Even that thursday date was tentative since he wasn't sure when he was free so that wasn't set in stone either. it was up in the air to begin with - even more so now Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 He may be thinking you two are still on for Friday and what would be purpose of talking about it in the meantime? He also could have felt unsure when you rescheduled and dialed back his expectations some. If you think you've been putting forth more effort, I would allow him to meet you half way and contact you. If he doesn't by the end of day tomorrow then I might reach out and confirm for Friday. You'll have your answer one way or another. Link to comment
Andytheman Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 He might be thinking you're playing hard to get or that you have someone who takes priority. Neither are good for his perception of you. He may like you, but he will probably move on if you don't do something. He has options too. If you think you'd like him, I'd recommend texting a few times so he knows you are toying with him. Link to comment
georgestraight Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 Yeah... move on. Regardless of whether or not he likes to text, he would be contacting you if he was even remotely interested. I'm guessing he has other action and was just fishing. Link to comment
Andytheman Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 So he knows you are NOT toying with him (of course) Link to comment
Andytheman Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 Your texts should be light but sincere. Link to comment
j.man Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 How far in advance was the first date planned? Were you the one who suggested Thursday as well? I'd say the ball's in his court and I'm thinking the answer is most likely "no" given he was wobbly about the original second date, too, but if your curiosity is nagging at you or you'd like to move on guilt-free with your weekend plans, it wouldn't hurt to send a quick, "Hey you, planning out my weekend and was just wondering whether that Friday reschedule would work for you." Link to comment
n0cturnal Posted October 26, 2016 Author Share Posted October 26, 2016 Friday was never completely confirmed though. Just a possibility. I guess but I immediately mentioned when i was free, as opposed to just saying i couldnt do the original day yeah i've been initiating conversations the most Link to comment
DancingFool Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 Even that thursday date was tentative since he wasn't sure when he was free so that wasn't set in stone either. it was up in the air to begin with - even more so now If you text with "drinks Friday 8 pm at x place, are we on?" - that would solve your dilemma quite neatly don't you think? Either you'll get silence and know to write him off or you'll get confirmation you have a date. Now if you get a tentative "maybe", then YOU write him off and tell him sorry but it seems like this isn't going to work out for us and then you can move on and not bother with him anymore. It's a win/win/win. Link to comment
n0cturnal Posted October 26, 2016 Author Share Posted October 26, 2016 That's not a bad idea to be honest, might shoot that over real quick. Yeah I would take it as him not being interested. This date was planned on the Saturday just gone I believe Link to comment
n0cturnal Posted October 26, 2016 Author Share Posted October 26, 2016 Good shout - when do you think would be a good time to send this? It's 10pm Wednesday in the UK here (no idea where you are, sorry) - should i message now or wait till tomorrow? Link to comment
j.man Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 I think it's pretty inconsequential whether it's today or tomorrow. Just put on your thick skin in case he nicely blows you off. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted October 26, 2016 Share Posted October 26, 2016 When you are both out there multi-dating a lot of this scheduling back and forth happens as meets/dates are set up, canceled etc. Text him once on Thur and ask if Fri works for him or is another time better. If you get another 'maybe' type response, move on.Friday was never completely confirmed though. Just a possibility. Link to comment
SherrySher Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Why is he not chasing you back? I think that would be enough for me to say "to heck with it"...who needs silence and confusion? and besides, there would be no silence and confusion if he were actually genuinely into you. Link to comment
SoulTaker Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 Hey all, to cut a long story short: met a guy last week and we hit it off. have been somewhat in contact since, albeit less than before the date - chalked it up to general busyness/no need for him to 'woo' me/he's not as into texting as i am. anyway, we were meant to meet one day this week but i realised i was busy that day so texted him saying i could do the day after if he could? to which he replied "possibly that day ( and since then...nothing. the day in question is friday. i messaged him this weekend and it's been 3 days. do i give up? do i act passive aggressively? do i message to prompt him? any help is much appreciated! Who made first contact? Link to comment
notalady Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 After his response of "possibly", I would've assumed it wasn't happening. Anything other than a yes is a no. Link to comment
notalady Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 OK, since you cancelled the date that was set up pretty much last minute, either this ship has already sailed because he got too miffed with that or it's on you to actually make plans now to make up for the cancellation. The ball is not in his court but yours. Granted, if you text with "drinks Friday 8 pm at x place, are we on?" and all you get is silence, then assume this ship has indeed sailed. I don't get the impression that the date was cancelled last minute, I read it as they set up a date (who initiated I don't know) and she realised she's not free that day so suggested a different date, at the time of setting it up, not on the day of the date was suppose to be. OP can correct me if I'm wrong. Also I see no point in being specific about the meeting time when the response to her suggestion of Friday was "possibly". His response could've been equally vague had she suggested a time and place. He just doesn't sound interested. Link to comment
LadyAbbey31 Posted October 27, 2016 Share Posted October 27, 2016 He doesn't sound too keen...BUT in the end, none of us know for sure. At this point there is no harm in sending one more text to make and effort to make more concrete plans. If he doesn't agree then that's that! Link to comment
n0cturnal Posted October 27, 2016 Author Share Posted October 27, 2016 Who made first contact? He made first contact Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.