Does a married man really love the another woman?

Hello everyone, this is my first time to post something like this in a forum or site. I just want to ask people out there especially who are/ were experienced the same situation as mine. I fell in love with a married man, but please don't judge me yet. We started flirting via online for 9 months, and after that he planned to visit me in my country and spent 15 days holiday with me. We had a great time together during that time and he told me he loves me so much.We became official as boyfriend/girlfriend for 6 months and just recently he came out clean and told me he is still married.

During our flirting time, i didn't suspect any red flag or anything that he is still married. He told me he was divorced for more than 3 years ago. His ex has her own place but his kids lives with him. Then on the time he came here in my country his "wife" stayed with his son that has OCD and Aspergers in their house. When he came back, his wife live there in their house again because the son is sick and even worse. We continued our relationship as it ease every day. We talked over skype all the time, as in all the time from his morning until i go to bed because of time difference. He told me that he will tell his "ex"( as he referred her) to sell the house and he will buy his own place. He even showed me some houses he wants to choose for me and him. He planned to have a small family with me. But time goes by and the selling of the house was postponed all the time. He tried telling his "ex" about it but she's always trying to avoid the topic. Recently, he came out clean and told me he talked to her to sell the house and he wants to get out of their house because he is already unhappy staying there for many years. They spent all day talking and she told him to try one more time for their son until he gets better at special school. And maybe they will find each other again which he told me he told her "NO" it's been all gone long time ago.

Then after one day, he told me he wasn't divorced yet. I saw him cry and i saw how painful it is to be in his situation. I was shocked, hurt and devastated too. I told him he played, used, and fooled me to fill the void in his marriage but he said no he really loves me so much. To justify it, he called his daughter and he called me over skype, and i was shocked she's there starring at me. She even said that her parents have problems and get even worse because of her sick brother and all the time she hears the word "divorce" from them. Next day, he told his wife about me. He told her that he has strong feelings for me. Of curse she was shocked and hurt.very hurt like anyone else does. After 2 days they didn't talk together, even I was also in pain I stand strong and i even don't know what to do because everything wasn't absorbed in my mind yet. He said he already firm in divorcing her. Then the day they talked very very long time. She told him she will forgive him, and give all the care, needs, intimacy, and love that he needs. They have to fix their marriage for their son too. He got confused and felt guilty and he agreed to her to try fixing their marriage. That time I also told myself to give up and let him go. I never had any intention in breaking a family. I chose to let go and chose myself than my love for him. After a week he called me and told me everything is empty, he can't eat, sleep, and stop thinking of me. Now it's been over a month. I deleted my email address, I changed phone number, but i can't change my skype because it is what I am using for my work/job.

Now, i don't know how he or how they are. I tried my best not to contact him.

I just wanna ask some people out there, if you were in this kind of situation for men or women who said that you fell in love with another man/woman is it rally true? Does fixing your marriage successful? Thank you for the time..

Good for you not contacting him. It does not matter whether he loved you or not. What matters is that he was not available to commit to you because he is married. In fact, I suspect that he was not even separated. He could have come to your country for 15 days and told his wife it was for business. I am sorry that this happened to you. Take care of yourself. And next time, work on meeting someone who lives nearby. Less likely you will meet a fake single person.

You deserve someone better than a man who would leave his wife & special needs child to be with you.

Block all contact with him & move on.

Take care

You deserve someone better than a man who would leave his wife & special needs child to be with you.

Block all contact with him & move on.

Take care

Agree! The guy is a creep! Also, how could you EVER trust this man again.

Keep your relationships local. Better way to see how your partner lives their life.

He's MARRIED! Be done with him!

Agree! The guy is a creep! Also, how could you EVER trust this man again.

 

Keep your relationships local. Better way to see how your partner lives their life.

 

He's MARRIED! Be done with him!

Yes, I tried to delete my my email address and changed my phone number.

I am on healing stage and i know someone will come along. Many told me I am young (28), sexy (as men usually refers me coz I am skinny) and smart.

There are just time that we fall for someone who is not meant for us.

I CHOSE to love myself more than being drag into his life and family drama.

Thanks everyone..

Good for you for loving yourself and choosing not to compromise your values on a man who cheated, lied and even used his kid to help him with his affair. The sob story he gave you is the golden standard for all married men who cheat - the wife doesn't treat me well/understand me/give me enough sex/etc, but we stay together for the kids (usually there is always a sick kid thrown in the mix as well), as if all these make their cheating more forgivable. The amount of married people on online dating sites these days is astounding, and you just happened to stumble upon one of them. I highly doubt he was separated when you two "met", none of these men are, but man are they good at pretending to be miserable in their lives and saying all the right things, to get unsuspecting, trusting women to fall for them!

Anyway, I hope you stick to your resolution to steer clear of him, because it's the right one. Block him so that he cannot get a hold of you ever again, and before you know it you will meet a man worth your time. You are too young to get involved in this kind of drama, and the best way to avoid it is to cut the cord straight away, the second you realize you are being played. So good for you for being smart and strong!

Does a married man really love the another woman?

Answer, short and sweet: No!!

aah. Just to add, he doesn't love his wife either, and most of all doesn't even love himself, in the good sense of that word.

You are right.. Maybe he was really so great at hiding everything from me. When we "met" his wife was living in the other apartment and I can even talk to him before he goes to bed and he sleeps alone, walk around the house and all. His son sometimes slept with his mom on the "other" house too. But i don't wanna dig too much about it in the past because it won't justify that he lied and cheated on me and his wife. Yes I do stick with my decision. He sent me a text message yesterday morning that he hopes I am happy and he wishes me really good luck to find my happiness because he also decided to stay in a flat marriage and his happiness is not important at all. I didn't reply and No plans at all. One of his friend sent me a message over FB that I should fight and stay strong for him. I didn't reply too, i told myself "for what? to be lied more, to be used and played more?" I am too smart to be stupid again. The only thing I wish is that I wish he didn't tell his friends, best friend, and also his boss about me. Now everyone knows about me and maybe they blame me for whatever will be the outcome to their marriage.

Why did you choose to believe and invest so much in a man who you weren't able to properly date and get to know? Why did you choose a mostly online flirtation with someone who doesn't even live in the same country as you ?

I agree with Hermes to answer your question.

What is you want so bad though that you were willing to invest your heart in someone you don't even know? You don't know him. And he doesn't know you.

Do I think what he did and is doing is messed up? Oh very much so. But don't worry about him. Worry about what choices you made and why that led you to this place. This could have been side stepped easily by regular dating in this case. He wasn't particularly clever nor sneaky. For some reason, you really wanted to believe what he was feeding you, blindly trusting this stranger who visits you for fifteen days could love you just like that. Why?! What's your gain to be had in taking part in the fantasy?

You are right.. Maybe he was really so great at hiding everything from me. When we "met" his wife was living in the other apartment and I can even talk to him before he goes to bed and he sleeps alone, walk around the house and all. His son sometimes slept with his mom on the "other" house too. But i don't wanna dig too much about it in the past because it won't justify that he lied and cheated on me and his wife. Yes I do stick with my decision. He sent me a text message yesterday morning that he hopes I am happy and he wishes me really good luck to find my happiness because he also decided to stay in a flat marriage and his happiness is not important at all. I didn't reply and No plans at all. One of his friend sent me a message over FB that I should fight and stay strong for him. I didn't reply too, i told myself "for what? to be lied more, to be used and played more?" I am too smart to be stupid again. The only thing I wish is that I wish he didn't tell his friends, best friend, and also his boss about me. Now everyone knows about me and maybe they blame me for whatever will be the outcome to their marriage.

Why haven't you blocked?

Why haven't you blocked?

I blocked him in all means i could, the only phone he sent message was my other very very old phone being used for sideline business. It has no blocked option in it and has no call forwarding whatsoever too. He also tried to open my fb page and google+, and he made other skype account. I can't make another skype because of my job as an online english teacher. I used it to have my classes.

I thought about it too, why did i trust him? But no matter how million times i ask myself why i believed and loved him the answer will always be the same. It won't justify anything now. And the answer "NO" to my question is already enough. Even you will tell me "YES" I won't and will never go back to him. I told him once before "I don't recycle boyfriends".

Just continue to ignore. He will let go of this eventually.