Not liking college as much? Got my hopes up?

Please read my story I'll try to not make it too long.

I recently just started college a few weeks ago and I've been having a hard time settling down.

In high school I had prepared for college constantly and it was all I thought about. I had these expectations of what college would be like, the person I would be, the people I would meet and stuff like that. Now that I'm actually here I'm not feeling so optimistic. No one seems interested in talking to me or knowing me in general. I've went to social events and I've had small talk but no one seems to want to go deeper then talking about the weather with me. I don't exactly fit in and I've been feeling really out of place lately. It has me doubting my choice of college. I even had thoughts of transferring after a semester. I really enjoy the campus, the location, the aesthetic and the curriculum style but I'm not fitting in socially. In high school I had four best friends who I was friends with for years and years and we all went to different schools. I'm fine with being alone. I can read or draw, I just had an expectation that in college I would find my "people" but it really isn't the case. I'm going into my third week which is statistically when college students start to form their solid friend groups and in debating if I should just give up the social aspect and focus myself on my studies and my own individual interests (Netflix shows, drawing and reading). I tend to isolate myself and I felt like I needed to not isolate myself but then I started feeling like everyone isolated me and I'm feeling discouraged and I'm wanting to hide away in my own interests.

There are NO clubs I want to join. I checked twice. I'm just having trouble socially. I enjoy this school but it's expensive. If I wanted isolation and no campus community or college experience I feel like I could've went to community college and stayed at home with my parents that way I could be at least somewhere familiar. I'm not dependent on people I just had a image of what I wanted college to be like. I feel like I'm being judged or not liked and I'm starting to take it personal. I'm a person who is very open to all types of people but I'm not feeling like I'm getting the same openness.

Please help.

Should I transfer?

If you transfer you will be in the same situation! You haven't given it a chance yet, week three has just started! You need to give this time. You will not be the only student feeling out of place, lonely etc and wondering what you've gotten yourself into. Every newbie to college goes thru this. Give it time. Try harder to seek out a couple of like-minded students in your classes. Try again to find a group or club to join. Take up a sport. Do you have a roommate? Get to know that person. Go to the coffee shop/restaurant/cafeteria in the college and work on meeting new people there. You have to put yourself out there more than you are!

Transferring is going to be more difficult fitting in because everyone is going to be in their "cliques" by the end of freshman year. It took me a couple YEARS to find my social circle after I transferred even though I was extremely social in high school and my first two years at a separate college. And at a community college, most people are only going to stick around for two years or less, and transfer to a 4 year college.

You have only been in college for month- you need to give it some time and a chance. Can't find a club to join that you like? Then start one. Why not get together with your classmates, form study groups and go out for a meal/drink afterwards? Invite them over for pizza?

Nobody is going to come to you in college- you have to work harder to put yourself out there. Social circles are much different in college than they are in high school.

I used to be in your shoes. Believe it or not, some people want to be friends with you others don't. You just got to keep trying at friendships and let them flow naturally. During my first year of college, I made a few horrible friends. Later on, I made better friends. You just need to find more clubs to join. You can always try making friends in your classes. Does your school offer learning communities? Try attending your school for one year and see if you like it or not.

If you are thinking about transferring schools, then you need to look at the requirements for transferring. As far as your social skills, it takes time to get better socially. It's a process. Believe me, it took me a while to get sociable.

Reality will never ever match up to the fantasy and ideas and expectations you build up in your head. If anything all those ideas actually hinder you from fitting in and enjoying the reality. So important lesson to learn and take away from this. In the future, allow yourself more to approach things from a blank slate perspective with an open mind rather than being full of expectations.

Don't know where you get the idea that after just 3 weeks people have formed life long friendships. Quite the opposite, as you grow and change, your friendships and connections will change as well. I agree with the other posters that you are way too quick to judge with expectations that are way over the top. Those expectations are stopping you from actually being open and working hard on developing connections. Making new friends truly takes work and time and effort and lots of it.

I can only echo the other poster here too. Early on I made friends that were meh, it was just more important to have people to hang out with, go to parties with and do things with so I have more open doors to meet more people who are more to my taste. Doing that worked and with time I made better friends. Again, it takes time and effort and just being open to people and different experiences. That's really what college is about - exploring and discovering aspects of yourself that you didn't even know were there.