Can two people with different activity levels work out?

My boyfriend and I had a discussion about this recently as I voiced my concerns.

You see he is an active guy! He loves being outdoors and is very equestrian as he owns horses and goes on long weekend horseback riding excursions at times. He likes to always be on the go.

I'm the complete opposite.

I love to stay in write, read and watch movies. I'm more of a homebody.

I know we are long distance and as we go we will see how we compliment each other in the differences.

I'm seeing him in November and have activities planned for him and I.

I want to go bowling, hiking and picnic, go to the zoo, and have moments where we relax and watch a movie or go out to eat.

So I'm sort of active. Just not to his extent. Also I have never been around horses or know anything about them.

I asked him if he needed a girl who could keep up with him, more equestrian. He said lets see how things go as we see each other more.

Im also going to Las Vegas with him in December and he will want to take everything in. I don't mind as I like taking in all the different themes for hotels there and walking through them.

I told him I don't mind if he is active and does his own thing as long as I get to be cozy and do my own thing.

We are just starting out our relationship.

So my question to all you lovely enotalone people is this:

Can two people with different level of activity work out?

We are similar in a lot of other areas such as religious beliefs, morals, ethics...

Lisa

I remember our honeymoon our very first day in Québec City my husband was up at 7 o'clock and we were exploring the city and he was doing so at a run I mean running up and down hills to see things . When he was young he was running everywhere and I do mean running . He would leave me behind all the time. Now in his late 40s he has settled for a fast walk ..... lol. We have had plenty of slow walks holding hand in hand or arm in arm .

It is about making a compromise or the best thing to it .

Thanks Victoria,

You are right it's finding that middle ground. I need to see in November how we match up being active and calm.

Lisa

Relationships are all about compromise. See how it goes. Have fun in November! X

Hey Lisa-

If that's all you two have to deal with, then I would say that's pretty good. My dad is a sports nuts, played football and baseball in college, goes to MLB games, college basketball and football etc. My mom, never threw a ball in her life. My dad, loves the beach more than anyone I have ever known. My mom? Can't stand it.

But they've made it work over these past 40 years, just something to keep in mind.

From a guys perspective, I run, cycle and stay pretty active. I wouldn't mind if I dated someone who wasn't the same. In fact, I've dated a girl who did triathlons and found it to be annoying at times. (We never competed against one another, but did workout together.) Sure, the workouts were fun, but it's nice to share other interests.

I think it's going to come down to that middle ground, like you mentioned. Not to mention, I beleive its good to have other hobbies. That way you're not always getting in one another's hair. I wouldn't sweat it.

Hope this helped!

Shelly: Thank you! I look forward to November!

Scoe141:

Yes that helped a lot!

Thank you so much for your input it makes me feel better.

In my last relationship we found a medium balance by me letting him do his music and me doing my own thing.

I don't think it will be different with this guy. He has had girls complain about him being very active in the past but told me I'm good about letting him be himself. I take that as a positive sign.

Hey Lisa-

 

If that's all you two have to deal with, then I would say that's pretty good. My dad is a sports nuts, played football and baseball in college, goes to MLB games, college basketball and football etc. My mom, never threw a ball in her life. My dad, loves the beach more than anyone I have ever known. My mom? Can't stand it.

 

But they've made it work over these past 40 years, just something to keep in mind.

 

From a guys perspective, I run, cycle and stay pretty active. I wouldn't mind if I dated someone who wasn't the same. In fact, I've dated a girl who did triathlons and found it to be annoying at times. (We never competed against one another, but did workout together.) Sure, the workouts were fun, but it's nice to share other interests.

 

I think it's going to come down to that middle ground, like you mentioned. Not to mention, I beleive its good to have other hobbies. That way you're not always getting in one another's hair. I wouldn't sweat it.

 

Hope this helped!

Exactly ,my husband is a total sports nut. He played so many different sports as a kid it was crazy . He watches every single sport on TV and I could care less . However, this Saturday at a sports game the Canadian Forces are being honoured and he is one of the people to hold the flag so I am going to see him not that I give two hoots about soccer . I am giving up a day road trip with some friends just so I can see him hold the flag .

Relationships are about give-and-take compromise and communication and making your partner feel special .

However, this Saturday at a sports game the Canadian Forces are being honoured and he is one of the people to hold the flag so I am going to see him not that I give two hoots about soccer . I am giving up a day road trip with some friends just so I can see him hold the flag .

 

Relationships are about give-and-take compromise and communication and making your partner feel special .

Awe Vic, that's so sweet!! I'm sure that means a lot to him.

He has had girls complain about him being very active in the past but told me I'm good about letting him be himself. I take that as a positive sign.

Yea, there's no need to complain. It's not like a bad habit that they're trying to help him kick. It's almost an attempt to change his identity. Perhaps that's why he is no longer with them...

Awe Vic, that's so sweet!! I'm sure that means a lot to him.

It does. I could just see his heart puff up with love and pride.

My boyfriend and I had a discussion about this recently as I voiced my concerns.

 

You see he is an active guy! He loves being outdoors and is very equestrian as he owns horses and goes on long weekend horseback riding excursions at times. He likes to always be on the go.

 

I'm the complete opposite.

 

I love to stay in write, read and watch movies. I'm more of a homebody.

 

I know we are long distance and as we go we will see how we compliment each other in the differences.

 

I'm seeing him in November and have activities planned for him and I.

 

I want to go bowling, hiking and picnic, go to the zoo, and have moments where we relax and watch a movie or go out to eat.

 

So I'm sort of active. Just not to his extent. Also I have never been around horses or know anything about them.

 

I asked him if he needed a girl who could keep up with him, more equestrian. He said lets see how things go as we see each other more.

 

Im also going to Las Vegas with him in December and he will want to take everything in. I don't mind as I like taking in all the different themes for hotels there and walking through them.

 

I told him I don't mind if he is active and does his own thing as long as I get to be cozy and do my own thing.

 

We are just starting out our relationship.

 

So my question to all you lovely enotalone people is this:

 

Can two people with different level of activity work out?

 

We are similar in a lot of other areas such as religious beliefs, morals, ethics...

 

 

Lisa

Yes. Depends on the people and their willingness.

Ask him what he would like to do and let him make some of the plans and just join along. Try not to fret and plan the perfect "active" visit, let him pick some stuff to do while there.

I'm seeing him in November and have activities planned for him and I. I want to go bowling, hiking and picnic, go to the zoo, and have moments where we relax and watch a movie or go out to eat.

Qwas.

This is a wonderful opportunity for you to learn horse riding. Riding out in the countryside is so lovely.

I think it is possible to balance activities, although I note you say you are the complete opposite.

Thank you all for your wonderful responses! I have a feeling he will boost my activity level up as we go along. Who knows like what you said Hermes maybe I'll start to like doing the things he likes such as horseback riding.

Wiseman: I think that's an excellent idea letting him pick the activities.

This is just the beginning and we have a lot to learn about being with each other in person.

Lisa

I prefer relationships where we have different interests. It's much less to do with complementing each other and much more to do with the fact I get extra time and space to do my thing while she does hers.

Generally speaking, compromising when it comes to interests doesn't work. You either end up doing something only one of you wants to do at all or something that neither of you are too thrilled about.

So rather than compromise, look for new things you may both enjoy equally that you can meet up on in between the time you spend doing your own thing with your own interests.

Jman,

Thank you, very wise!

I agree that separate interests for each others space is a good idea.

I did think of something he and I both want to try that we have never done. For my birthday next year we are going to swim with the Dolphins.

As for little excursions I love picnics and want to try camping, which he loves to do.

You have definitely opened my mind to new things for us to try and to still keep balance doing our own thing we love individually.

In a year relationship right now with a man who'd read a book and hold my things while I play football, soccer and SUP in succession. He'd stay at home while I dance. His travel plan involves 5 stars hotel in a pristine places with cold weather; mine involves drinking with locals in street food stalls or the beach and play water sport (he dislikes sand and water, lol).

We compromised and enjoy each other companies. So sometimes I'd bring fried chicken and beer to stay inside or skipped the beach during travel. And sometimes he'd ride back to back 4 roller coasters with a green face.

I can vouch that as long as the core values and future goals are similar, both of you can adjust with the other differences and find things to do together (just like what the other posters have said!)

I say yes.

Two people can learn from each other and even if different then they can share and grow this way.

Definitely, I think it just comes down to willingness to accept the other person and their interests (that means letting them pursue their interests while you pursue yours), and develop shared interests and activities.

His response about seeing how things go had me slightly concerned (only slightly), because it seems to indicate that it does matter to him that the person he's dating share his interests and active level, to what extent I don't know, maybe he doesn't either.

I think it can.

If I dated someone I want them to be fit. Active in the sense they can at least hike and dance and go for long walks. It's not all about the level of activity though. It's the kind of activity. Equestrian bores me to tears. I wouldn't want to be around that activity at all, or hear about it at all. So it would be more a compatibility thing.

Then again, I don't talk about running to my dates unless they ask. I don't expect them to run with me. It would be kind of nice though to date a runner/dancer. But then again, if they are completely different pace than me, we probably couldn't run together.

Could I be any more vague I think like a lot of things, people that are on the same page are more compatible. Two active people are likely to be more compatible.