Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 20 of 20

Thread: " babymother drama"

  1. #11
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    41
    Yeah we get along and i get she'd want to know who's around her daughter but it's never the baby she's calling about.. My bf told me himself this is what frustrates me

  2. #12
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    111
    Originally Posted by Coleworldx
    Apparently she calls to talk about her boyfriend? But her boyfriend is the same guy she left him for. Which leaves me even more confused !
    I always pushed for him to talk on the basis of their child as he always refused to do it. They don't even meet to co-parent. He picks her up from her grandma's? None of it makes sense to me
    Well this makes a big difference. I would not tolerate this. She doesn't need to be calling him for anything other than the child. It sounds like he needs to set up some boundaries. If he doesn't, then I would make a big deal about it.

  3. #13
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    111
    Originally Posted by Coleworldx
    On and off for around 8 months. Let's also take into account the fact I don't know if she calls when I'm not around as he doesn't tell me. All I know is when she does call and I'm around they can't talk.

    I completely understand how you're feeling about not knowing what they talk about and if they talk when youre not around. He needs to establish boundaries and he needs to be open and honest with you anytime they communicate. And if he thinks you're being unreasonable, then you need to rethink the relationship. He should be extremely understanding because this involves the child. Life will be extremely difficult if you guys are fighting over this...even worse if it creates a problem with her. He needs to handle this before it becomes a huge thorn in his side.

  4. #14
    Gold Member brienoch's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    California
    Posts
    952
    Gender
    Female
    Yeah what does he say about it besides admitting that she calls to chat and it has nothing to do with the kid? Does he like chatting with her? Does he seem peeved by it? Is he just unable to establish firm boundaries with this woman? Or is there something going on there? Like I said, it sounds weird as heck. Like a pretty big mess if you ask me. She's got a guy that she left him for, he's got you, they have a baby together, and they have each other, too. Sounds like you and her guy are the losing parties in this situation.

  5.  

  6. #15
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    34,212
    Gender
    Male
    After being together a year it must concern you why they need to carry on as much as they do. Particularly since there is this element of feeling excluded from this.
    Originally Posted by Coleworldx
    I agree. I'm insecure but in also not stupid and I could never be so comfortable to phone an ex knowing they're in a relationship to discuss things other than our child. Thank you wiseman

  7. #16
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    41
    Originally Posted by brienoch
    Yeah what does he say about it besides admitting that she calls to chat and it has nothing to do with the kid? Does he like chatting with her? Does he seem peeved by it? Is he just unable to establish firm boundaries with this woman? Or is there something going on there? Like I said, it sounds weird as heck. Like a pretty big mess if you ask me. She's got a guy that she left him for, he's got you, they have a baby together, and they have each other, too. Sounds like you and her guy are the losing parties in this situation.
    He says he doesn't talk to her infront of me cause it's disrespectful and because she started the convo with " can u talk" he knew it wouldn't b about the child and that's why he said no. It's not valid at all, he says she calls him he doesn't call her and he doesn't kno what she wants and it's probably that she's split with her bf he doesn't want to hear it. Ok if u don't want to hear it why say u can't talk? Why haven't you set boundaries from the beginning that it's not a conversation that needs to be had. He said when she mentions us he comes off the phone cause it's not about the baby.. None of the convos are about the baby so it shouldn't b happening! Then says it's the first time she's called in ages. I'd never kno anyway as she must call when I'm not around too! I'm so angry about it all I feel like the third wheel in my own damn relationship

  8. #17
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    41
    Am I wrong for being as angry as I am?

  9. #18
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    111
    Nope, I'd be pretty upset about this. Don't doubt yourself. I think it's unacceptable if she's calling to talk about anything other than the child. He doesn't need to maintain any other relationship with her other than to co-parent. This can lead to emotional affairs and even physical affairs. You have every right to be uneasy.

  10. #19
    Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Posts
    6
    Hi Coleworldx, you doubt maybe your significant is still having an affair with his ex girlfriend who happens to be his babymama. Are you feeling insecure for your own relationship with him. I see it as a 50/50 you either win him over or she wins him back. The child in between them is a bond meaning there can never be a total separation between them. They still need to talk about the welfare of their daughter. Put yourself in her condition if it happened to you will you forget your daughter? Allow him to talk to her freely in your present, dont't feel jeaolous from their conversations you will know if your spouse still loves her. Another thing is that if you don't want him to continuing talking to her frequently maybe he should give the child to his parent or the baby mother parent and be sending her upkeeping allowance.

    Coleworldx, see his daughter as your own daughter, treat her as your own daughter with this your spouse will know he is with the right partner. As you do this you never can tell you are doing yourself favour.

    I wanna ask are you married to him legally? Has he shown up to your people, made himself known to them and his intention so that you don't become a second babymama this is very very important this is one of your security in his life. And how much is his love for you?

    Coleworldx, i wish a happy relationship.

  11. #20
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Posts
    41
    I have a great relationship with his daughter and love her like my own, she knows that and loves me she always says it.
    She doesn't phone about his daughter, ever
    She phones when her relationship is in turmoil as if she wants a rebound. He doesn't like her calling and it is only when her own relationship isn't working out.

    We're not married but live together. He's known to my family and I am with his. Me and his mother talk everyday ..

    The arrangements for his child is he collects his daughter from her grandmas house once a week and this is also when he gives weekly maintenance for his daughter.. he can't even drop his daughter off to her mothers house! I genuinely do not have any issue with communication regarding their daughter, I'm not a jealous type in that way at all. But there are boundaries if you're not calling in regards to their daughter

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •