Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 31

Thread: Crush rejected me and now he ignored me

  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Tokyo, Japan
    Posts
    12
    Gender
    Female

    Crush rejected me and now he ignored me

    My crush rejected me saying he has been seeing someone else at the moment (when I confessed my feelings to him, telling him I wished we could be more than friends), and now I think we're in awkward terms. We will still bump into each other in college, this puts us at a difficult situation as there are gonna be a number of activities in which we're both involved in.

    What I don't get is this: It's funny how he was the one who rejected me, and now he's ignoring me as though I do not exist. Is he trying to avoid eye contact with me? Like why? I could act and be completely cool and normal around him, but it's weird how he seems like he is the one feeling very awkward around me. I hope we could like at least still talk like normal friends, like before I confessed.

    We used to talk (before I confessed) for a while with good chemistry. I'm sure he felt comfortable expressing himself out when he was with me when we were on friendship term before. He was really nice to me when we were talking before I told him I liked him.

    What should I do? I may bump into him anywhere in college. Should I just avoid him when I see him so he will feel more at ease with me around (since he is ignoring my presence now)?

  2. #2
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    14,912
    Originally Posted by txrxbxllx
    What I don't get is this: It's funny how he was the one who rejected me, and now he's ignoring me as though I do not exist. Is he trying to avoid eye contact with me? Like why?
    Of course he's avoiding you. He told you he has a girlfriend, you told him you wished you could be more than friends. The whole situation is now extremely awkward, so I don't blame him. He's moved on and is not interested in you,

    What to do? Move on. And yes, avoid him if you can. He's not interested.

  3. #3
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Tokyo, Japan
    Posts
    12
    Gender
    Female
    He apologised for not being able to love me back, and that he's currently unavailable at the moment. It's fine if he is not interested in me, but I hope he could at least stay friends, like you know, smile when he sees me like a matured guy. He ignoring me makes the whole situation even more awkward. So do I continue this? What if I was to bump into him one day?

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    14,912
    Originally Posted by txrxbxllx
    So do I continue this? What if I was to bump into him one day?
    No, you don't continue this. If you bump into him, be civil, greet, and move on. Nothing needs to be said.

  5.  

  6. #5
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Tokyo, Japan
    Posts
    12
    Gender
    Female
    Do guys secretly mock the girls they rejected inside? Guysss, if you have to reject a girl who has been really nice to you, how do you feel about her? Will you look down on girls you rejected?

  7. #6
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    23,215
    Gender
    Female
    Did you know that he already had a GF when you raised being more than friends?

    The guy likely doesn't want to send you mixed signals to lead you on, so he's shut down at the moment. I'd just pleasantly greet him as I pass by and not attempt anything more. Allow time to dilute the awkwardness, so should your paths cross at a party or in a class you can just continue to be civil without pursuing anything beyond passing kindness.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    52,199
    He doesn't want you to misunderstand his intentions and he wants to keep his new girlfriend happy so he is avoiding you - it's hard to strike the balance -certainly he should be polite/civil so what I would do is limit the interaction to polite/civil and then he might feel more comfortable doing the same.

  9. #8
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Posts
    344
    Yeah, my first question is similar to Catfeeder's - how did you not know he had a girlfriend in advance? And lesson learned for the future, before sharing feelings, find the person's status first. Now you're going to have to back off and give it space, because there will be awkwardness for a while as it would for anyone. He knows how you feel, so to be respectful of his girlfriend, he will have to keep a distance from you and make sure you don't get any wrong ideas.

    And backing off will also give you a chance to move on without getting caught up looking for all kinds of secret signs that you think shows he actually likes you. Many people do that to themselves.

    You said there were talks with "great chemistry", it would have been good to apply some of those talks to actually finding out if he was dating someone which doesn't have to be blatant, something under the radar such as "I have to study all weekend, I hate that. How about you? Study weekend, or are you going out..."

  10. #9
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Tokyo, Japan
    Posts
    12
    Gender
    Female
    I honestly didn't know he was actually seeing someone just recently, until I confessed my feelings to him. He told me he couldn't 'like' me back because he is chasing after her at the moment.

    Yes we did have great chemistry. I knew him for quite a few months already, and from what his close friends said, he doesn't seem to be hitting up anybody or is currently in any sort of relationship. And he had never mentioned anything about him having a girl he likes or a girlfriend throughout all the times we talked. He even asked me if I am single or in a relationship the very last time we caught up with each other. He coyly smiled when I told him I'm single.

    All of a sudden he told me he has been seeing someone at the time I confessed. This took me a huge surprise because in my knowledge he has always been living the 'single life'. Well since he is not interested in pursuing anything further than this, I accepted this and will move on. Thanks everybody for the kind advice! =D

  11. #10
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Location
    Tokyo, Japan
    Posts
    12
    Gender
    Female
    Thanks Batya33, I will try to control my inner emotions whenever I see him, and be polite and civil if we have to talk in any occasion. Very good advice.

Page 1 of 4 1234 LastLast

Videos


Maintaining A Strong Relationship

Detaching From a Malignant Man

Divorced Parents Prefer Technology and Social Media As Communication Tool

Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •