What helped you feel better today?

For all those here going through a breakup, this is a place to share the things that make you feel better. We are all in this together, after all.

It could be anything, too. If a song made you feel better, post it. If you read a good article, post it. If someone said something funny, tell us. If you saw a funny YouTube video or something, show us.

I will start by telling a story...

I have been trying to feel better by doing nice things for others. And so I have been taking a pen and post its with me every time I go out in public, and when I go in a public bathroom I write a nice note and stick it on the mirror for the next person who comes in there to see.

Well, one night last week at work I did something similar, only it wasn't a posit it. I wrote it on a large sheet of paper and propped it up on the bathroom sink. Well originally I wrote it on a smaller sheet of scrap paper, in black sharpie, and it looked really sloppy. So I decided to write another more legible one.

The note said "Smile, someone loves you."

Well, I have a lot of stuff that gets transferred from pocket to pocket in my work pants and I don't even think about it. Today I was digging around in my pockets looking for something (I think a hair tie.) And I wear fatigues at work so they have tons of pockets. Well I pulled out this slip of paper wondering what it was. It was the note... the sloppy one. It said, "Smile, someone loves you."

I know it probably sounds dumb, but that made me feel better. I intended it for someone else, and then it ended up being practically forgotten about, and seen by me today. So I guess I wrote it last week to my future self.

Also a total stranger came up to me on the street today and asked if everything was ok and gave me a hug.

So, I hope this thread gets a lot of replies. Please share. If you are going through a breakup, what made you feel better today?

Today, I took a spin class. I'm about 2 1/2 weeks out since the breakup, and I hadn't been eating or sleeping very well, so being strong enough to work out and do something I enjoy meant a lot. I did pretty well, and a lot of stuff the instructor was saying resonated with me. During a difficult hill she said something along the lines of, "Keep going, the only way to get past it is to go through it", which is true of this as well. The only way to emerge on the other side is to go through it and feel everything. I've also done 2 days completely NC, which is nothing, but it feels good. I also said "yes" to a friend asking to go out and meet a bunch of her other friends. Though I didn't stay for long, I'm proud of myself for going out and meeting new people.

It's getting better each day. Stay strong.

This link sounds like it might help me today. I have to watch it again and let it sink in. Letting go of blaming others and of blaming yourself as well, because the only thing we are responsible for is the present moment.

I'm 7 months out. The thing that helps me move forward is knowing I'm past all the negative energy and I feel more free and alive. Im also going back to the things I enjoy such as being in my faith again, finding what suits me now or things I may have neglected such as losing weight and taking care of myself.

I pushed myself to go on a date even though I tried talking mysrlf out of it and on the drive to meet him felt the dreaded 'I'm not ready to date yet feeling.' Well I went and although the person wasn't necessarily what I'm looking for romantically, it felt so good to talk and laugh and just feel good about myself again. Reminded me that's what I want, not a situation with my ex where we never even laughed or had fun anymore.

[video=youtube;XqWofBdhT2k] ]

A friend of mine played this song for me the other night. I have been listening to it pretty much once a day since.

Ze Frank was a pretty well known YouTuber for a while, and he got a request to wrote a song for a girl who was struggling with anxiety. So he wrote this song for her, and sent it out to a bunch of his followers, asking them to record themselves singing along to it. So in the video he included all their voices too. So, this is essentially people all over the world working together to help one person overcome her anxiety.

[video=youtube;ccIt-qRQBoI]

This made me laugh... but it also made me cry.

Today I was beating myself up for picking yet another bad relationship partner. I made the exact same mistakes as the previous two relationships and I am so frustrated at myself.

All the red flags were there, my instincts told me I should not start this relationship....and I ignored everything.

Then I realized what this means. I can trust my instincts.

You see, when that little voice was telling me it wasn't right, I reasoned that it was fear talking...or unrealistic expectations...or something. But now I know that once again it was my instinct talking and it was RIGHT and I should have listened. And I know now that the next time it speaks I can trust that it is right as it always has been and I will listen.

Realizing that made me feel good.

Doing great on my tests in school today. I actually started to not go because I was trying to come up with all these excuses but I went and glad that I did. It made me feel really good about that accomplishment. Thank you. Great post!!

I pushed myself to go on a date even though I tried talking mysrlf out of it and on the drive to meet him felt the dreaded 'I'm not ready to date yet feeling.' Well I went and although the person wasn't necessarily what I'm looking for romantically, it felt so good to talk and laugh and just feel good about myself again. Reminded me that's what I want, not a situation with my ex where we never even laughed or had fun anymore.

I was feeling the same way about 2-3 weeks ago (whenever Valentine's day was). My coworker asked me on a date and I thought he was kidding, but he was so serious. It got my mind off of her for a while.

My morning coffee break and lunchtime.

Writing out all of the negative relationship traits she exhibited in the last year. Why would I want to go back to that?

Wine.

I don't recommend alcohol to feel better or anything...but my ex hated that I liked to drink wine sometimes. He thought I was an alcoholic or something...but I am just French lol.

So enjoying a glass of wine without judgement is a nice reminder that I do what I want when I want now.

I wrote on my mirror a few weeks ago:

"To shoot an arrow forward, first you must pull it back"

And everyone I see that, I know good things are coming

Also, that Demi Lovato song "Confident" is a good "I'm feeling sad but want to feel amazing" song.

Wine.

I don't recommend alcohol to feel better or anything...but my ex hated that I liked to drink wine sometimes. He thought I was an alcoholic or something...but I am just French lol.

So enjoying a glass of wine without judgement is a nice reminder that I do what I want when I want now.

 

Mine used to get on me about this too. And I never understood why since this is a man who would drink a beer before a job interview just to help him relax.

Today I picked trash up off the floor at work. Oddly enough, this made me feel better.

This is something that helps me feel better in a bittersweet kind of way...

I have a really good long term memory. And I remember things from when I was really young. And one memory keeps coming back to me of me and my Mom when I was like 3 or 4.

My dog had just been killed. She was hit by a car. And I was sitting on my Mom's lap in the living room of our upstairs apartment. And I was so upset. I was crying my little eyes out, and my Mom was hugging me and rocking me. And I kept asking why my doggy had to die. And my Mom told me she didn't know, but saying goodbye is a part of life. And we had just watched the Wizard of Oz a few weeks ago. And my Mom said, "Remember when Dorothy had to say goodbye to everyone is Oz?"

There are days when I still feel like that sad little girl and I want to be on my Mother's lap being held. I wish I could go back to when life was so simple.

And my Mom has been there for me through all of this. Despite our differences (because my Mom and I have been through a lot) she has helped me through this more than anyone else. I call her every night on my lunch break.

Today I baked cookies for my co-workers. I will take them in tomorrow.

I also felt the desire to draw/paint again. I found an old sketchbook last night while going through stuff, and I couldn't believe some of the drawings in it. All my painting supplies are at my art studio behind my new house. But I can still draw here. I have pencils.

And... that transitions to the next things. There are several truckers who deliver steel and other things to the company I work for. One of them always brings his dog in his rig with him. And when he is unloading and stuff, he leaves door open and his dog just sits there on the driver's seat being so sweet. I love this dog. He's so cute and has such a friendly personality. And he's also blind. I have talked to his owner in the past and this guy absolutely adored his dog. So, tonight I took a picture of the dog, and I plan to do a black and white charcoal drawing of him and give it to his owner. I get paid to draw/paint people's pets. He doesn't know that, but I think he will really like it.

I also have been able to take some comfort in knowing that my day job, even as non-glamorous as it is, saves lives. I am an artist, but I am also a quality inspector in an automotive plant. I have taken comfort in knowing that every defect I find could potentially save someone's life. Bad car parts cause accidents. Accidents kill people. So, every time I scrap a bad part, and every time I sign off on a good part, that's a potential life I saved.

Those are the things that made me feel better today.

(Posted on another thread as well)

Fortunate me!!

Yesterday few of my friends from college days called up. They were so happy talking to me after such a long time. For catching up, Mid march they have planned a dinner in a very nice restaurant.

I know we are going to have a blast, can't wait.

They all are looking forward to see me and so am I.....Happy days!!

Don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing... but it made me feel better and I guess that is the point of this thread. Today I got angry... for the first time since it happened. People kept warning me it was coming. Today I felt myself being mad at him for doing this to me. That and for throwing all these issues in my face, and not even giving me time to work on them before dropping the bomb on me. And for leaving so much of his stuff at my house. What... so you want time apart and in that time my place is supposed to be your friggin' storage unit... while I'm moving? He knows I am not mean enough to just throw it all out on the curb. So, I get to pack it all up and move it to my new place so he can come and get it all at his leisure I guess.

And not only am I moving... but my step dad is being prosecuted for sexually abusing my sister and I, and here soon we are going to have to testify against him. So... moving on top of all that, and the home buying process is pretty stressful as is. Paying rent on top of a mortgage payment... and he does this now. Now! Today I got pissed.

Also today I went to a clothing store and bought myself a new outfit. I am going to an album release party tomorrow. I have plenty I could wear... but most of my clothes are bagged up at the new house. So I figured I would just buy myself something to wear.

Also, the thought of going to a music festival this fall in Europe made me feel better today, too.

A cigar, a good coffee and petting my cat sitting on my knees

I'm having a really bad day today... I didn't even want to get up. But I did some mindfulness meditation specifically geared for depression... and that seemed to help a little. I got up and took a shower and I am forcing myself to get all dressed up and go to this album release party this afternoon. I'm going to try my best to be social and meet some new people. I gave myself the challenge to strike up at least one conversation.

Weekends are the hardest for me since that's when he used to come over. I am not having a good day but I have hope for it to be better.

Ooh cynder- I love that idea of leaving notes for people. Have you read "One Million Lovely Letters"? Basically this girl has gone through hell and she starts a website where people who are suffering email her and she sends them a lovely letter to help them feel better.

I think doing nice things for others is a good way to get ourselves out of our own pits.

Anyway, it's still early here so I'm still in bed but I woke up with thoughts of my ex swimming around in my head. So what I've done to make myself feel better is to jump out of bed, grab a coffee, stick on a face pack and sit in bed for a bit and catch up on ENA.

I've not been on here for a few days because I've been spending a lot of time at my new gym- which is also making me feel so much better!!

Ooh cynder- I love that idea of leaving notes for people. Have you read "One Million Lovely Letters"? Basically this girl has gone through hell and she starts a website where people who are suffering email her and she sends them a lovely letter to help them feel better.

 

I think doing nice things for others is a good way to get ourselves out of our own pits.

 

Anyway, it's still early here so I'm still in bed but I woke up with thoughts of my ex swimming around in my head. So what I've done to make myself feel better is to jump out of bed, grab a coffee, stick on a face pack and sit in bed for a bit and catch up on ENA.

 

I've not been on here for a few days because I've been spending a lot of time at my new gym- which is also making me feel so much better!!

I haven't heard of that. Sounds really cool.

My apartment is almost empty. I am still sleeping on a mattress on my bedroom floor, with black sheets, black pillows, black comforter. Last night I spent the night at a friend's house and was given a purple sarong to wear to bed so I wouldn't have to sleep in my jeans. Well, he told me to just keep it because he doesn't wear it anymore. (Yes, bisexual cross-dressing friends are the best kind,

Well tonight when I came home I took the sarong and put it over the pillows on my mattress, just to add some color to this room. Surprisingly, little things like that help.

Saturday went for shopping. Got some beautiful dresses for an upcoming wedding & some family functions. Ate lot of good stuff...mmmm was so happy.

Discovered a new maket for home decor, would like to exlpore sometime later.

Sunday stayed at home-relaxed, ate & jogged. Overall a nice weekend!