How to let everyone know that it's over without feeling the pain all over again?

It's 1 month past the break up of a LTR. I haven't told my parents about it and only some close friends knows. Every time someone asks about him, I felt a stab in my heart. Yes, it still hurts. I'm torn between playing along (oh, he's fine!) and saying up straight that we have broken up. But I have come to a point that I think it's time to just let everyone know that it is over. Here's my question:

1. At what point did you all started changing your facebook relationship status post BU?

2. How to deal with nosy friends who's first reaction after hearing that the relationship is over is a bewildered WHY? or I THOUGHT YOU WERE GETTING MARRIED?

Thanks in advance!

I told everyone pretty much straight away and got it over with.

How do you deal with everyone you ask? Well, how about telling people the truth? You're doing yourself no good by telling everyone lies about yourself. Yes, dating/relationships is a personal matter that really isn't other peoples' business, friends and family included. But at the same time, your friends and family ask about your relationship because they love you and want to see you happy. If they knew you were split up and depressed about this guy than they would probably quit asking about this relationship. Wouldn't that be nice?!

You don't owe people and explanation as to why the break up happened or any gritty details. But they can at least know that it happened. Look... why do you have close friends/family? Ask yourself that question, "why do I have friends and family?" Why do you maintain contact with them? It is probably because you and these people, you all love each other. And you like to have them as support, especially your parents. Your parents, well good parents (I'm not sure if you don't like them or something), they just want the best for their child and they want to be there to support you through the good times and bad. They would probably want to know you are in pain over your breakup so they can be there to talk to you and comfort you if needed.

I think it is normal/healthy for you to talk to your friends/family about this. That is what they are for! For support and human nurturing. Not to keep bottled up from your life. I think you need to lose this train of thought or you are going to have a hard life never having anyone to talk to and having to keep secrets all the time, especially over stupid things like a break up. Yes, it is a stupid thing. Breakups are part of life. It happens.

Just tell them, you don't owe them an explanation. Your parents could be great support for you right now, sometimes you don't know how helpful they can be until you are open with them.

1. When it happened.

2. Tell them they were clearly wrong.

Okay, it is like peeling off a bandaid. Just take the plunge and do it.

You will not heal until you take that plunge.

Just keep the explanation short and simple. Rehearse what you will likely say in front of the mirror.

This is part of your healing process, so do it right away and get it over with.

Thanks for the feedback. I know a part of me is holding on to the past but I realize the need to just take the plunge and move forward towards healing. Thanks again!

You don't have to tell people right away. You can give yourself a little space and privacy. What I would advise is what a friend did some years ago. She sent a mass email to her friends. It was short - stating that her and XX were broken up and that she didn't want to get into the reasons. She just wanted to let everyone know so folks weren't asking where he was. She asked people to respect her request and when she was ready she would talk about it.

I thought that was a good way to go. Don't do that on facebook though. Too public.

In the future, don't publicize a relationship on facebook. Because, for this reason, you'll feel embarrassed if and when the relationship ends.

you dont have to come out and tell everyone. but when people ask you about him or your relationship. thats the point where you just tell them its over and that you dont feel comfortable talking about it. its how i did it and it went pretty well for me.