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Do I still have a chance ?


Gymcandyman

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Me and my ex gf have been broken up for a little over 2 months ,I took her for granted ,was selfish, she didn't think I really cared about her

The things she didn't like about me

I was addicted to gambling

I took steroids had mood swings because of it

Was abit lazy and got comftable

 

In the past months I've been really thinking about the mistakes I've made ive banned myself from the bookies , quit the steroids , I've become a lot happier person and I'm changing for myself not just for her I'm starting become a real man growing up

 

We've been in limited contact , she asked to meet me the other day for a catch up, we went gym together and we went to get some food, I proceeded to flirt with her make her laugh touch her as much as I could I told her how Im sorting myself out got a job realised the mistakes of the break up ,Last time she said she sees me as just a friend but I know she's just saying that so she don't get hurt again so am I wasting my time I just want to show how I've changed and I've improved get them lost feelings back taking things slow to gain her trust showing I won't let her down ever again is there a chance that I will get her back this way ?? Some good advice is needed

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Yup. You're getting defensive, because there is a problem. The truth stings. Many people ban themselves, then find themselves back where the were, because they did not take the necessary steps.

 

You cannot get your relationship back, until you deal with your "gambling addiction" and steroid issues.

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banning yourself from the betting shop isn't the same as addressing the inner conflict from which the addiction spawned. it takes a lot more than two months to deal with that effectively. two months is nothing. it takes more than that for a lot of people to even hit the acceptance phase of a break-up, let alone recover from addictive impulses.

 

add to that you resorted to a mood altering substance to merely achieve fitness goals and it should click in just to what extremes you're willing to go to have your needs met, and just how eager you are to decrease the needed personal investment in terms of time, dedication and self-control in various endeavours.

 

spare the both of you the consequences of this and focus on recovery. when you've gone through several cycles of the usual life with it's stress, temptation and perpetual demand for hard work without resorting to a substance or activity that promises to meet you half-way but is destructive instead, then consider giving dating a fair shot.

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