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Thread: Please help, not sure what to do

  1. #1

    Please help, not sure what to do

    My name's Jonathan I'm 18 and I could really use some helpful advice on what to do in my situation. Okay so I have been dating this girl for about 4 months now and I'm pretty sure that I have lost some feelings for her. It's been almost two weeks that i haven't been feeling the same about her, just stuff like I'd rater hangout with friends then go and be with her, I don't get "butterfly" at all anymore, sometimes I don't respond to her text if I see them telling myself ohh I'll talk to her later and just thinking about other women on the occasion. Now I'm asking for advice because I still like her just not nearly as much as I did and I really don't want to hurt her in anyway if I break up with her. Another rough part about this is I have been her first intimate partner and she lost her virginity to me and thinking back I feel like that was a mistake and should have waited longer to be sure that I really wanted to be with her for a long time. But no the less this is my problem. I know that she has strong feelings for me and I don't know how to break up with her without hurting her. Please help

  2. #2
    Platinum Member mhowe's Avatar
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    You can't break up with someone without hurting them. And you paying less attention to her is also hurting her. So best to break up and leave her to heal.

    Going forward, don't rush to be intimate until you are sure of your feelings.

  3. #3
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    You're going to hurt her. She's never going to forget you either... You never forget your first, Just saying.

    Anyways with that being said just be honest with her, be respectful, and be polite. Also do it face to face not through text. Be a man. Good luck

  4. #4

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    You're already hurting her by ignoring her. And it's going to hurt no mater what way you try to break up with her. You should do it soon and let her start healing. She doesn't deserve that. And trust me she'll never forget her first. She going to hurt a lot poor girl.

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  6. #5
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    There's never a clean way to break up but I can tell you what not to do -- don't employ some of the tactics that people do (maybe with the best intentions) to 'spare the persons feelings'. In other words, don't be purposefully distant or "hint" to her that you want out and make it that much harder for her. Don't stage a whole "I'm cheating on you thing" to get her to end it, these are tactics I've seen firsthand and heard about and I can almost understand people's reasoning for them (very little, but I can)

    Also, as has been mentioned, please do it in person, she deserves more than a phone call or text message. Be polite, as others have said but you can be as friendly as you want about it, and sadly, you're still going to hurt her, it's just human nature


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