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Thread: Another online daing journal

  1. #31
    Platinum Member WithLove's Avatar
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    Can you just tell him that you thought it was a bit too forward for you, for now?

  2. #32
    Platinum Member notalady's Avatar
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    I would bring it up with him, just gently. See if he changes or you two get used to each other. I've had to give a number of people I went on dates with (that I was serious about seeing where it goes) gentle hints of what I preferred or what wasn't working for me, such as saying "just a bit less tongue" while kissing, instead of bringing it up like a formal/serious thing some other time.

    They all took it well, it was interesting though only one (current bf) actually improved, and it was because he was a bit nervous/not as relaxed the first few times, once I pointed it out, he got back to his usual kissing style and it was all good. Other guys though, one changed a little bit and it didn't bother me that much to begin with so we both adapted to each others style. The other one was actually bad (think octopus on your face), I tried it twice, gave him hints both times, he did it better for like 10 seconds then reverted back to his normal style, I literally just wanted it to end while we were kissing lol! Needless to say I had to drop him.

  3. #33
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by WithLove
    Can you just tell him that you thought it was a bit too forward for you, for now?
    It wasn't necessary the forwardness of it as much as the technique.
    OK .. Ill be graphic . His tongue was very stiff and jabbed roughly down my throat. . Even in the throws of passion this would make me run from the room.

  4. #34
    Platinum Member WithLove's Avatar
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    Well even using tongue at all is pretty forward this early!!

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  6. #35
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    "(think octopus on your face)"

    I am currently giving the receptionist her lunch break, lots of guests and busy phones and this one gives me a case of the giggles. .

  7. #36
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by WithLove
    Well even using tongue at all is pretty forward this early!!
    You know it started off perfect and then went south.
    Maybe it was because of the moment I jumped on his bed and surprised him . . he may have got alittle excited. . I went back for second kiss and got more of the same. Again. .even if it was excitement it wasn't enjoyable.

  8. #37
    Platinum Member notalady's Avatar
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    Just tell him you prefer less tongue next time and see if it makes any difference.

  9. #38
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    Ya, I had this problem with one of my exes...same tongue thing. One night when we were kissing, I gently said that I wasn't used to that much tongue or that I usually don't kiss with so much tongue (or something like that) and then I said "I like to kiss like this" and then I showed him....unfortunately, the kissing was always bad between us, to the point were after a short time I just stopped kissing him, and the sex was also bad...our relationship didn't last long....I don't want to be a downer, sorry, lol, my ex had an ego and had issues with me being honest about this stuff, so if your guy is ok with listening to your needs then it probably won't be a problem....just be gentle when you tell him

  10. #39
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by happpybear
    Ya, I had this problem with one of my exes...same tongue thing. One night when we were kissing, I gently said that I wasn't used to that much tongue or that I usually don't kiss with so much tongue (or something like that) and then I said "I like to kiss like this" and then I showed him....unfortunately, the kissing was always bad between us, to the point were after a short time I just stopped kissing him, and the sex was also bad...our relationship didn't last long....I don't want to be a downer, sorry, lol, my ex had an ego and had issues with me being honest about this stuff, so if your guy is ok with listening to your needs then it probably won't be a problem....just be gentle when you tell him

    This is my concern and I am forecasting a little here and taking into consideration the lack of assertiveness may not translate well into our physical relationship.
    IF it does indeed go "there".

    I am also guilty of looking for signs to bolt. .So I need to settle down here a little and relax.

  11. #40
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    Ya, well his shyness might totally dissipate when he is more comfortable with you. The kissing might also calm down too like notalady said, nerves can really mess things up sometimes

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