Autoimmune Disease - Really Gotten Me Down

Back in July I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease (cicatricial alopecia) after almost a year of noticing excessive hair loss whenever I would take a shower or comb my hair. I am a guy, age 33, and many people tell me I'm handsome/good looking, but this thing has really taken it's toll on me emotionally. I always hated losing my hair (which guy doesn't right?) and I actually did something about it a few years ago and got a hair transplant from a very good doc. All was well, and I actually loved my hair! It was so exciting to have a full head of hair again (even though some people said they liked me better before lol), but it left me with a scar on the back of my head (which I knew would happen and was a risk I was willing to take at the time). And then boom....a year after I get hit with this autoimmune disease that has been taking my hair slowly and is thinning out my hair.

I am pretty depressed over this and really don't even want to go outside. I want more than anything to get married (again) and have kids (don't have any now), but this thing has really made me just want to put that on the backburner. Just the thought of having to have her see me in the morning at some point with my hair not in a condition I am proud of freaks me out. I guess I know that someone can love me in spite of this, but it's tough to undertake getting into a relationship.

I was going to a dermatologist and they really didn't know what to do to help me, so they literally printed some stuff off the internet and wanted to take that approach with me. I did it for 30 days but it got worse (more inflamed) and then they wanted to put me on the next level of meds. It freaked me out b/c they said that I could begin to lose my eyesight with the meds and they wanted me to get an eye exam first and be checked every 30 days. If that didn't work then they were going to suppress my immune system (which can't be a good thing I thought). After all, I know the immune system is there for a reason (even if it is attacking me right now).

I then went to a functional medicine doctor that said that he believed (after looking at my blood) that my issue was the gluten in my blood and has been helping me to eat healthier and get my body in a condition that will allow my immune system to work properly. I've seen some relief, but the hair still falls and I still hate taking showers in the morning. About to go on the Paleo approach diet full go and try to knock this inflammation down and get this under control.

I just needed somewhere to vent and hope that I can get some words of wisdom from some others who may have gone through something similar or at least a similar experience emotionally. Right now I feel knocked down and almost out - although I still have hopes that I will beat this thing. The more I read, the more I realize that changing what I put in my body is the only way to lasting relief from an autoimmune disorder. But the time it takes it the sucky part. Meds can help more quickly (if they actually work) but they don't help the underlying cause.

Thanks for listening and your support!

I've heard this strange story that emotions (in your case intense fear) can manifest itself physically because thoughts are things, and because you project this fear on losing your hair so much it physically manifests itself onto your own body in the form of an auto immune disease that makes you lose your hair.

Now , i don't know how much of that story is true, but i do know you should detach yourself emotionally from the loss of your hair. Because at this point in time, your emotions are pushing your life into submission. The condition of losing your hair is effecting your daily emotions. So here's a little story.

My uncle was around 22 and he practically lost all of his hair , this was also a huge emotional problem just like yours. What he did, was buy a very expensive wig for around 4000 Euro. This wig matched his type of hair color perfectly, and could even withstand taking showers.

Maybe it was the hair transplant that gave the immune response actually. My advice therefore would be to look for the best method that most men with hair loss had good results with. My uncle did the wig thing ,but that was over 25 years ago. There must be better methods by now.

Thanks Xylitol. Yeah, I have heard that as well. It's definitely hard not to stress a little bout something like this. Kind of like having a gun pointed at you and told not to stress about the gun. As for the wig thing..I've considered hair systems. I've also considered something they all SMP (scalp micropigmentation) which basically is like a tattoo of hair. lol. Sounds crazy but it seems to work for some guys. Plus it could potentially help cover up my FUT scar if I do end up having to shave it. I haven't given up complete hope on this thing reversing yet, but it's been tough.

I guess my hair has always been something I've enjoyed and felt like it makes me feel younger. I don't know, but I guess I'll just continue to wait this thing out and try to reverse it naturally. It's just harder to struggle and be alone during the holidays. I've went to two Thanksgivings with friends and had a great time...but miss having a SO to enjoy the holidays with. I also think that this whole struggle would be a lot easier if I had somebody to support me through it and to know would love me no matter what. It's tough to think about having to date and all of that when I am struggling with this.....

I was diagnosed with a chronic disease in July of 2013...it takes a while to get over the shock and get used to the meds and the side effects of the drugs...I was so mad...I'm supposed to be in my prime...not feeling crippled.

I don't have any suggestions...just wanted to say, I know how much it sucks, and in time will come acceptance and peace. I didn't think I would be able to date with what I have, but now that meds have my body under control, dating is fine.

It gets better.

I know it must be very traumatic for you but sometimes one has to learn to accept what the body is throwing at us and make the most of it. I know, easier said than done, but at the same time, fighting nature will only cause a lot more anxiety and stress to no end.

I know a guy who was completely grey at age 21 and his hair turned snow white by the time he reached 24, and he looked awesome! He simply accepted it and was always a very happy, positive and smiling person. He was/is amazing and has led a wonderful life. I also have a close friend who was losing his hair at age 23 and he took it in his stride and decided to go for the bald look and shaved all the rest of his hair off. Girls think he's the hottest guy around and he looks really really good! Both these guys had/have a good, positive attitude and are very happy, well balanced and very popular with their peers.

Also, most people simply accept that it's natural for men to lose hair and go bald. No one really looks, nor cares. It's just normal and no-one even thinks twice about it. Hope that helps to see it from another angle.