" In a box not a bottle" Asperger's revealed

I am helping son again with teeth self care. His manual dexterity is just so so bad for fine motor skills. He has had occupational therapy a few times but it never made a difference.

My son tried a new food last night! Chicken parmesan.

good choice!!!!!!!

good choice!!!!!!!

He is trying new things at a rate of every few months now! It is so exciting and it expands the number of places we can go to dinner too!

Hi, haven't read through the whole thread so you may have mentioned it before, but how did you get your son to try something new?

Did you make it in the off chance he'd try it or did he vocalise that he wanted something different? Good on him and glad that he liked it so it opens up othet options when you're out together!

Hi, haven't read through the whole thread so you may have mentioned it before, but how did you get your son to try something new?

 

Did you make it in the off chance he'd try it or did he vocalise that he wanted something different? Good on him and glad that he liked it so it opens up othet options when you're out together!

We were at a restaurant and he ordered it. My son is 20. So he decides for himself. But his menu is expanding! Not as a young child though. He was far far more rigid.

ooh! great progress that he even did it on his own!!! Did he like it?

ooh! great progress that he even did it on his own!!! Did he like it?

He did , yes ! He typical hates sauces and cheeses all over things so I was shocked. It got the sniff and tongue touch tests like he does with all foods but then he ate it. I was surprised too because he loses his mind if food touches on the plate .

ok, but chicken parm is super delicious!! Glad he was adventurous!!

My son tried using chopsticks the other day!!!

My son scored 93 on the traditional test . He has adapted to severe disability quite remarkably so obviously he can't be lower average . That would make no sense . He is also incredibly verbal in that if you tell him things verbally he "gets it ". In fact the psychologist who did his testing said he is extremely unusual for an autistic person in that he is quite verbal . In that he learns almost exclusively verbally . So he is extremely difficult to test and very difficult to know where he stands on the global scale . They pinned it at 93 because that's all that they could determine with the present test . But his global cognitive abilities were extremely difficult to measure because he learns verbally not written down . But if we think about it this way what do we do with societies that have oral histories or are just oral . Do we consider them low average intelligence , well heck no .

 

He has a great capacity to learn as well . I really don't believe he's low average . He is just an oral learner. Whereas I learn by seeing . Which is more traditional .

IQ tests and intelligence theory are one of my interests, along with ASD and a few other brain-related things. I really don't think standard IQ tests are designed for those with ASD - I'm not sure which test he was administered, but most spend a limited time on any given subset of the test before moving onto the next one and requiring new rules to be adapted for the next task.

If you look at a person with ASD who has the ability to delve deeply into a topic and become incredibly adept at it fairly quickly, and to a greater extent than most NTs ever will, it doesn't make a lot of sense to administer a test that requires them to perform a new task every 5-10 minutes. But that's why it measures "general intelligence" which is very loosely defined as the ability to problem-solve in everyday life

So, everyday life moves fast and maybe those with ASD don't adapt as quickly. But to equate that with "intelligence" doesn't make a lot of sense. And yet that's the ability that IQ tests try to capture ...

The ultimate reason is that the form of intelligence captured by the test is the one that they can do population studies on to find how it correlates with things like health, career, happiness etc. That's all it really means

IQ tests and intelligence theory are one of my interests, along with ASD and a few other brain-related things. I really don't think standard IQ tests are designed for those with ASD - I'm not sure which test he was administered, but most spend a limited time on any given subset of the test before moving onto the next one and requiring new rules to be adapted for the next task.

 

If you look at a person with ASD who has the ability to delve deeply into a topic and become incredibly adept at it fairly quickly, and to a greater extent than most NTs ever will, it doesn't make a lot of sense to administer a test that requires them to perform a new task every 5-10 minutes. But that's why it measures "general intelligence" which is very loosely defined as the ability to problem-solve in everyday life

 

So, everyday life moves fast and maybe those with ASD don't adapt as quickly. But to equate that with "intelligence" doesn't make a lot of sense. And yet that's the ability that IQ tests try to capture ...

 

The ultimate reason is that the form of intelligence captured by the test is the one that they can do population studies on to find how it correlates with things like health, career, happiness etc. That's all it really means

Absolutely, the test is flawed for anyone other than your average person.

Absolutely, the test is flawed for anyone other than your average person.

I'd be interested to see how they measure the intelligence of a person who is blind and deaf. Would you give them a low score because of how they adapt to the testing requirements?

Hellen Keller was obviously brilliantly intelligent

I'd be interested to see how they measure the intelligence of a person who is blind and deaf. Would you give them a low score because of how they adapt to the testing requirements?

Hellen Keller was obviously brilliantly intelligent

Absolutely. The test is entirely flawed because it doesn’t take into account any disability whatsoever . You can have disability and be totally brilliant .

I just had to cry tonight . I miss my child. Any parent with a child with autism or has a sibling with autism will tell you they " miss" their loved one. My son was typically social until he was 3 and then he disappeared. And I only " see" him about every 4 to 6 months. It is heart wrenching.

I've read the first few pages and the last few pages of this thread.

I'm just wondering if you could help me understand this a bit more? Do you feel shut off from your son even when he is physically present, because he's not as emotionally expressive as other people?

I've read the first few pages and the last few pages of this thread.

 

I'm just wondering if you could help me understand this a bit more? Do you feel shut off from your son even when he is physically present, because he's not as emotionally expressive as other people?

It is not so much about emotionally present but reciprocity of conversation. For most of his life I had no reciprocity of conversation with him unless it was about his favourite topics and that was it. Period. As he’s gotten older it has gotten better . We now have conversations about school ,about topics in the news ,about how he feels about how I feel conversations about every topic under the sun not just his favourite topic . At least now these are daily conversations not once every six months . So I see the inner glimmers of him . And not just a topic . I mean he doesn’t converse a whole lot you might get a half an hour days conversation from him ( he is intensely reclusive )but at least it’s not about Pokémon, Yu-Gi-Oh and vanguard every day for six months .

I understand. I don't recall what I spoke about when I was younger, but I do recall having trouble finding words to respond when others would talk. Leading to selective mutism. I still struggle with back and forth, there are many awkward silences. But there was a dramatic improvement between age 22 to now (27 in a few months). Brains mostly finish developing around 25 yrs of age so maybe he will show a similar trajectory around that time

How do you find he is with emotional reciprocity?

When he was 17 he asked me for the first time how I was and if I was happy. I know he loves me , very deeply, very deeply. If I cry even now at his age he just sobs with heartbreak . He can’t bear to ever see me unhappy . But he is an intensely emotionally reserved person . He is much more open about feelings with his pets . He loves loves loves loves his cats . And you will catch him talking to them about their feelings. I am a very touchy-feely discussing feelings kind of person though . Neither my husband or my son are that way .

I have seen massive development the past two years . He turned 20 in October .

Yes, I've read accounts from other people with ASD that the late teens and early 20s are the some of the hardest years because of the transition into adulthood. But also a time of huge growth

I genuinely believe many people with ASD are highly empathic. He feels what you feel

Yes, I've read accounts from other people with ASD that the late teens and early 20s are the some of the hardest years because of the transition into adulthood. But also a time of huge growth

 

I genuinely believe many people with ASD are highly empathic. He feels what you feel

Absolutely he is. I am highly empathetic that is to say I am an empath. He may be too. I " hear" and see energies. I feel énergies and I have seen spirits and Angels and demons. I know that sounds messed up and unbelievable but it is true. I believe he is an empath but not on my level.

But funny, he is the only one who believes me about any of this.

People keep talking about services, get services . In threads. Yeah ,right. You tried to get services for autistic people. How does bulls—t grab you.

Absolutely he is. I am highly empathetic that is to say I am an empath. He may be too. I " hear" and see energies. I feel énergies and I have seen spirits and Angels and demons. I know that sounds messed up and unbelievable but it is true. I believe he is an empath but not on my level.

Do you mean you have seen those things as in a feeling/sense that you felt?

I am agnostic but I used to be a bit more spiritual/religious when I was younger because I had an experience where the room felt brighter and I felt immense clarity, like an epiphany. That is one of the reasons I decided to study science, but since I started learning about science I put that particular experience down to brain chemicals. Illicit drugs that work on certain brain chemicals can give the same feeling to users that I got at that moment

That's not to say anything of religion. Knowing how the brain induces experiences doesn't discount 'why' those experiences happen. Science can't explain that. We can just say 'how'

Do you mean you have seen those things as in a feeling/sense that you felt?

 

I am agnostic but I used to be a bit more spiritual/religious when I was younger because I had an experience where the room felt brighter and I felt immense clarity, like an epiphany. That is one of the reasons I decided to study science, but since I started learning about science I put that particular experience down to brain chemicals. Illicit drugs that work on certain brain chemicals can give the same feeling to users that I got at that moment

 

That's not to say anything of religion. Knowing how the brain induces experiences doesn't discount 'why' those experiences happen. Science can't explain that. We can just say 'how'

No, I have actually seen an angel and a demon. I saw an angel when I was five . I was having a very hard time at the time because my parents were breaking up . And I absolutely know for sure I saw it . And he told me that I would always be all right and that I always had been all right . The demon I saw a few years ago and it had masked itself as a child with black eyes and pointed teeth. It came to me three nights in a row . When my son was an infant I would see a shadow man in a top hat come out of his room. I have seen ghost animals . I see things in my peripheral vision . I can tell people what colour their auras are. I can feel energies even from people all the way across the world . My son even witnessed me see a ghost . Right here in the house that I live in now I saw soldier walk across my bedroom . I shrieked a bit and said oh there you are . And my son came into my room and said Mom who are you talking to . I said didn't you see the man walk out the wall .

#MakeDTCFair

Our response from Autism Canada:

I wanted to personally thank you for sharing your experience with regard to applying for or maintaining your Disability Tax Credit. The responses were both overwhelming and heartbreaking. For those who had questions or asked for assistance, we are working on getting back to you as quickly as possible.

This morning at 10:30 am EST, Autism Canada is testifying at the Standing Senate Committee on Social Affairs, Science and Technology on the Disability Tax Credit (DTC) and the Registered Disability Savings Plan (RDSP). Click here to watch it live online. We have also posted our written submission online for you to see how we captured your concerns.

This afternoon, we will be meeting with the Office of National Revenue. Dermot Cleary (Chair, Autism Canada), Paul McDonnell (PhD., L.Psych. Psychologist, New Brunswick) and Jennifer Zwicker (PhD., Director of Health Policy, School of Public Policy, University of Calgary) will be representing Autism Canada. Specifically, we will be meeting with Anne Ellefsen-Gauthier (Director of Policy, Office of the Minister of National Revenue) and Josée Guilmette (Chief of Staff, Canada Revenue Agency).

During this meeting, Autism Canada will discuss our five recommendations for improving accessibility to the DTC and RDSP:

1. Create clear, transparent and informed processes for applications, reviews and appeals;

2. Develop clear, consistent and universally-accepted classification criteria for disabilities;

3. Uncouple the RDSP from the DTC;

4. Monitor and evaluate population-based disability data at the federal level; and,

5. Include the neurodevelopmental community on the Disability Advisory Committee.

We are asking you, the autism community, and respective organizations to use the hashtag #MakeDTCFair on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram starting today. Please like and share Autism Canada’s posts on this important issue so that our voices will be heard. The more momentum we get, the sooner we can see these issues resolved.

Thank you for your support; together, we can #MakeDTCFair for #Canadians with #autism.

Their submission to the Senate and CRA.

https://autismcanada.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/AC_Senate-Submission_2018-02-01_FINAL.pdf