Diary Of A Redhead

To become a wife was always my dream. To be your wife, a pleasure. To call myself a mother? The honour is all mine.

What did I do to deserve so much love? I've never known love like it.

I've known a lot of love in my life. I am one of the lucky ones. You can say, I have been blessed with true love - that romantic, intoxicating, I'd die for you love. And I can say, after finding that and the honeymoon never leaving, I can say I could die happy. But now we are a little family, and when I held my baby son in my arms, I felt like my heart could burst.

It's the strangest thing. Labour was quick, well, the run up to it maybe not so, but it was a suspenseful build up! I thought or kind of knew I had a very minor leak on my waters. I went to the hospital and they dismissed me and sent me back. The next day the same, the second midwife I saw sided with my verdict but still wasn't sure. Third day, no pain, no contractions, 9 am I laid in bed as the builders arrived to re-landscape our yard and I could just feel these minor cramps, but not like cramps I'd felt before, and I just knew! I KNEW GOD DAMN IT! Excitement flooded my whole body. Adrenaline - exhausting adrenaline that would have me micro sleeping as I semi-nodded off in the birthing pool 7 hours later.

With a stoic British attitude I am quite proud of, through very close and very painful contractions, I made 6 builders cups of tea and carried them (stopping along the way to clutch and catch my breath), on a tray to their little site. I kept crouching in the downstairs loo. It was getting bad, heavy breathing came naturally, I kind of just knew, again, that this was close. A lets do this mentality started to creep in, I was starting to not be able to concentrate on anything else but the spells of clenching pain, getting through them, then focusing on the moment it would let up and give me a moments release to catch my breath before the next wave came over me. I called D. He was away in town but close by. I think he started to panic as he came late because he was fussily buying me bottled water to take to hospital and kind of pacing a bit with nerves and anticipation. I half jumped over a 5 foot long ditch of a trench they'd created in the yard for the foundations of a new wall. All mid contraction. It had started to snow. Beautiful, white flakes making everything look so clean. Oh my God. Car was ready, bags packed in the back, this was it!

We got to the hospital and I walked down familiar corridors I'd been in before. For your first scan, anxious about your health, for your second scan, anxious for your development, for your third scan, you wouldn't rest in the right place, but you gave me my wish and more! You got in perfect position 2 weeks early. And, now, 2 weeks early at 38 weeks you were coming a bit sooner than expected. I had to keep stopped to rest on the side of the wall. I remember looking down at my feet. I was wearing grey velvet trainers. That same hospital smell - cleaners, squeaky floors. Strangely comforting when before it used to turn my stomach with the smell. They check me over and turn me away, too soon. Not a problem. Two hours spent in the old copper bath at home with D running and re-running the water. He says,

"Lo, these contractions are so close, really I feel you need to be in hospital! We need to go."

A bit more urgency this time. I can hardly talk for focusing on just getting through them. I'm very quiet, breathing and panting! Not glamorous. I feel horrendously sick, something I didn't expect. So hot as well. Very sickly hot. I slowly get out the bath, I'm sick in the bath. Everything is taking treacle time, slow, slow, slow baby steps, my baby is coming! Making me make baby steps, like I'm learning to walk again, like I'm ancient, holding onto anything I can for support, changing position constantly to try and find some solace from the pain of the contractions. I feel like I want to push. I tell D this. He looks wide eyed and hurries me back into the car. I'm ridiculously applying lipstick through pauses in the contractions to almost strain on all fours on the bedroom floor. Funny looking back, I had to have a sense of normality through the whole thing.

Hospital round two - definitely time! It's time! I begin to have the overwhelming feeling of knuckling down. Pacing the room hunching over, hardly saying anything, don't want to be touched and my eyes are closed almost constantly. I can hear D making light of everything, cracking jokes to the midwife. The young midwife is slim and very helpful but I hardly notice her, she tells me she'll start running the pool which I said in a groan I would really like to try. No medication yet, I'm wondering inbetween the all consuming contractions when I'll get anything. I don't even have the energy to ask, too focused, too much energy and mental strength going into pulling the pain away from my mind and doing whatever I can to relieve it. I catch glances of D and he's looking in silent awe at me with a smile on his face, and I can tell he's excited but I hardly register any of it. He looks naturally worried too. He keeps asking me if I need anything. Insanely, I strain out "thank yous" to every midwife even though the effort to say anything is draining me. I cannot be impolite to these people helping me even if I have to say cheers through a grimaced stick between my mouth. I'm sick in the loo a few times, but it's purely bile as I haven't eaten anything for at least 24 hours. For some reason, I suddenly lost all appetite before labour the day before. I am dry heaving as if I'm really badly hung over and there is nothing left to get out. No one told me about this, this sickness. I wonder briefly if it's normal but couldn't care less by this point. I feel dizzy, the hospital is so hot, why is it so God damn hot?!

I somehow manage to get myself into a bikini! The pool is ready, I slip in and relief washes over me. The pain hasn't gone away but the warm water has taken off a slight edge. The room is dim, relaxing, the water very hot. It's making me feel even more sick but I put up with it because my contractions are bearable. I think I whisper to D I feel like I'm going to be sick, my cheek is resting on the side of the pool and I remember my eyes being closed most of the time. I am in my own world. My world is black and my only job in this world is to breath, breath through the pain, breath the pain out of my body.

An older midwife takes charge. She has a very gentle, low voice that for some reason I find kind of irritating. There's an ugly, white plastic clock on the wall behind me. Every hour, I glance at it, I try not to glance too much, but time is going very fast. Every hour I ask this breathy Miss Daisy if I can have some gas and air. Not yet she says. She says this for 4 hours. I am in the pool from about 4pm till well - it's 7:30pm and I hear her say to D;

"This baby will be born before 8 o'clock."

Unbeknown to me I've started pushing well before she said this. I just had too! The overwhelming urge! I am in my own world doing my own thing. Pure instinct has taken over and I don't need to see anyone or be told anything. D said I was bearing down, no screams, no swearing, just this low kind of animalistic sound! So embarrassing to think back. My polite midwife asks if some students can enter who are thinking of becoming midwives. I am past caring, all dignity gone in a dim pool on all fours gripping the side handles of this pool so tight I think my fingers are white, so I nod and I can hear D making light jokes of the whole thing. He keeps saying to me throughout this, "You look so beautiful. I know this sounds strange, but you look really cute." I can barely smile or acknowledge him, I am hardly thinking of our baby, I am thinking, "When this is over, I can sleep, I just want to sleep."

7:30pm - for probably the 6th time I ask this old school nurse if I can NOW have some gas and air and FINALLY she delivers me this tube with the mouth piece you see in the movies and starts running through the instructions but my moving through treacle hand reaches out and just takes it from her and I take the deepest breath of this stuff I've ever taken, and instantly a lovely light headed dream like feeling covers me and I'm pushing, each push is a relief, a magic relief, and I am thinking weirdly, "I wonder if women felt like this in medieval times" and I can feel D squeezing my hand and then there is a collective suspense from what feels like a massive audience behind my naked butt, and I hear the midwife say, "Look! He doesn't know he's being born!" And I can just feel a weight drop away and it's my baby, our baby! And he's fine! And I can hear her say to D, "Do you want to announce the sex?" And his eyes are filled with tears and he can't talk, he shakes his head, and she says, "Congratulations, he's a boy!"

Like a veil being whipped away, as soon as he is out all my exhaustion, pain, concentration - everything, it disappears immediately and it's like someone flicked a switch in my mind and I can focus again. The dark is gone and now I'm in bright light. Awesome. The feeling of it's done is awesome. All my energy comes back. More energy than I've ever had before. I'm back from the deep of my mind! She is saying to me, all smiles, "Do you want to hold him? Sit up on this part of the pool" and I notice there is a ledge for sitting on and oh my God, where is my baby, there he is! Relief, again, awesome relief, he is healthy, he is perfect, and can I say it? A mothers bias? He is GORGEOUS! He is just beautiful! And I can see D for the first time, my husband! And this love is washing over me, I want to cry myself but I'm beyond it, sheer joy, pure joviality and celebration is eating me up and I want to sit here forever and I want to hold my blue, quiet, perfect little boy in this warm dim pool with my husband looking over in absolute disbelief. I never want it to end!

He was born at 7:53pm on Monday the 15th January and weighed 7lbs 3oz.

I can tell you, we never knew what we were having, and when I realised he was a boy and saw him for the first time, it was like I'd always knew, and it was like I'd always known his face, yet I'd never met him before. Maybe I saw him in my dreams. Maybe it's a mothers connection. There you are, darling, you've been with me all this time, my love! Our family.

D held him for 4 hours straight while I took a shower. Everything was bizarrely normal. I was in perfect health, so lucky, the birth went as well as it could of and I was up and about. He fed straight away in my arms, his sleepy eyes all scrunched, I could've died. I kept looking at our son, at D, back again - what a trip. Words can't describe. I knew as soon as I held his tiny body in that pool, that life would never be the same, that we would never be the same. My husband was a Daddy, and I was a Mommy, and we were a family.

When we brought him home we felt like he was made of glass! So delicate, so tiny! We had problems with him feeding the fist week, it was wracked with stress and worry - he was losing weight too rapidly and I was having to express milk and give it to him through a bottle. We were exhausted with the 2 hourly feeding rituals and the struggle to get him to take a bottle or me. Suddenly, after a week, he just got breast feeding. Maybe it was because he was a little early, still thought he should be in, but anyway, things righted themselves and he started to flourish. He had the energy to open his eyes!

He is 13 weeks old on Monday. I can say the time has flown yet I feel like it has been just right. All is right in the world. The responsibility is overwhelming. There have been days where the exhaustion of feeding him 3-4 times a night has made me into a semi-hallucinating zombie. Yet, the lipstick has stayed on (times may change, but standards must remain!) and I have felt a new kind of overriding passion for D since our son was born. Seeing him as a doting father, he has been so great with me and with our bubba, that it was just so... kind of... damn sexy! He can't get enough of his son. Working in the house during the day, every second he's had free he has ran to him and never wanted to let him go.

To see him sleeping on a night, with his arms back up over his head, his cupid bow lips slightly parted... it's like looking at a cherub that accidentally fell to earth. So perfect. A white blonde boy with rosy cheeks and blue eyes. I have had so many compliments on his looks. "He's got such beautiful features", "He looks like a proper little boy already!" "I have never seen a more perfect baby" "He looks like a baby from an advert" I am a proud mama, I could go on. He is handsome like his father. D has especially great genes on the mens side. The men look very masculine. I am so glad he looks like his father.

I have been walking through the local park with him on a sling. There is a hill you can climb up, and once we get up to the top, there is a formal statue and benches and you can see the sea and the rets of the city behind you. On a dull day, there is often mist from the coast. I walk up there with him often, nearly everyday, and I feel a kind of euphoria mixed with exhaustion and just, so much love. I see him close to me, curled in, and I want all the happiness for him and all the care I can possibly give, and my heart is so full I could sometimes cry, I have plenty. I've looked at him asleep, and D asleep in the bed stretched out too, both at complete peace and I have cried tears of pure joy. I know we will live on through him, and I know, as cliche as it sounds, our son is the best thing I have ever done. My proudest moment was the day I became your Mummy.

I was walking through the park with him attached to my front again, early on a morning on one of those days that let you know Spring is coming. The air was still chilled but the sun was beamed, lighting up the pond and the Victorian formal planting and statues, and I caught sight of what looked like a little wren, and he was gathering sticks in his mouth, hopping back into the cover of the hedges, and I caught a lump in my throat because a thought crossed my mind; he is making a home for his family, and I realised I have truly found home. It is with my son, my husband, in my arms.

Lo x

I think your writing skills have already been alluded!

Some people are meant to be parents. You are one of them! You preferred boy or girl? (both are great, just gossipping lol)

I think your writing skills have already been alluded!

 

Some people are meant to be parents. You are one of them! You preferred boy or girl? (both are great, just gossipping lol)

Dias!

So nice to hear from you! OH MAN! Thank you - honestly, what a lovely compliment. I am so lucky to have him as a son so just hope I can do my best for him as a mother. I will try my hardest! We are starting to really enjoy him now as we're getting into the swing of things a bit more, it's a massive learning curve, no one really can prepare you for it, even the practical things, so I've been trying to learn as quick as I can off him!

And I had no preference at all! I suspected I might be having a girl actually! But then looking back, all the things I thought were neutral that I bought for his nursery were kinda boyish! I am absolutely loving having a boy though! Always got on with men better hahaha! It's being great, I call them my boys (D and him), they gang up on me mind!

How're you?

(And, having the best subject to write about ever, which is of course, LOVE!, makes anyone want to write and write and write!)

Lo x

I am doing good. The weather is starting to get better, so yeah, I feel great!

I have exams next month and I am bit stressed. I can't wait to visit some other cities in the UK :)

If I remember correctly, we are about the same age. I really can't image myself being a parent. But again, women mature faster lol.

Glad you are enjoying being a parent :) . Boys are better! He will probably ask you for a brother in a couple of years lol.

I am doing good. The weather is starting to get better, so yeah, I feel great!

I have exams next month and I am bit stressed. I can't wait to visit some other cities in the UK :)

 

If I remember correctly, we are about the same age. I really can't image myself being a parent. But again, women mature faster lol.

Glad you are enjoying being a parent :) . Boys are better! He will probably ask you for a brother in a couple of years lol.

Which exams are you taking? If I can remember you are a complete maths genius!!! The opposite of me! Math and I don’t get on!

I will wish you luck for it but ya don’t need it!

And I turned 28 in December but actually think I’m kinda old when I start hearing 2 years till 30! How old are you?

Oh! Already working on that now!!!!!

Lo x

Math genius is a hyperbole for sure but thanks :) Exams for my Master's degree.

I turned 26 in December. Well, I am pretty sure that at 28 I will not be ready !

Math genius is a hyperbole for sure but thanks :) Exams for my Master's degree.

 

I turned 26 in December. Well, I am pretty sure that at 28 I will not be ready !

A fellow December baby!

And I don't think you ever are really ready for a baby - you will have missed what would make you a good father at 18, and are yet to find what will make you a great father at 30. I think every age and every stage in your life you have something different to offer. Nothing can prepare you for it though, just have to go with the flow!

Best of luck with your Masters, not that you'll need it! I have my fingers crossed for you!

And which cities have you visited in the UK by the way? I would suggest York if you haven't been!

Lo x

A fellow December baby!

And I don't think you ever are really ready for a baby - you will have missed what would make you a good father at 18, and are yet to find what will make you a great father at 30. I think every age and every stage in your life you have something different to offer. Nothing can prepare you for it though, just have to go with the flow!

 

Best of luck with your Masters, not that you'll need it! I have my fingers crossed for you!

 

And which cities have you visited in the UK by the way? I would suggest York if you haven't been!

 

Lo x

Lol. December is known for its good looking people!

Thanks. I got a good mark this morning so your wish helped!

I've been to London and other small towns in Essex. I would like to visit many cities but I don't have unlimited funds unfortunately so I am thinking about Manchester, Leeds and Edinburgh. After the exams though! You are from Yorkshire?

Lol. December is known for its good looking people!

 

Thanks. I got a good mark this morning so your wish helped!

 

I've been to London and other small towns in Essex. I would like to visit many cities but I don't have unlimited funds unfortunately so I am thinking about Manchester, Leeds and Edinburgh. After the exams though! You are from Yorkshire?

I believe Brad Pitt, Julian Moore, Jake Gyllenhaal mwahahaha December babies!

And excellent! I knew you would! I hope you're celebrating!

London is like a different world I think - I have a love/hate relationship with it. Manchester is a good one, massive music scene there and I used to work a smidge in Edinburgh so I know a section of it very well. There's quite a cool place to eat there called the Witchery. Pretty gothic and moody restaurant. And yes I am originally! Don't live in that area anymore but I know York well - I would suggest a bar called Evil Eye if you ever go, do really nice cocktails, my favourite is the Majestic Melon!

Lo x

What an intense experience!! I'm glad you are content.

With a stoic British attitude I am quite proud of

Maybe you can shed some light onto this situation.... I have a British coworker. He's a good guy, but a bit on the stoic side. A couple of weeks ago, the heel of my boot suddenly broke as I was talking to him. I said, "I think my heel just broke," and I lifted up my shoe to see. Sure enough, It was broken. My coworker let out an abrupt chortle, and then immediately cut it short and said, "Musn't be rude." His unusual outburst of laughter made me laugh out loud. But he switched into complete stoicism and seemed to want to forget about my broken heel altogether. Meanwhile, my other coworkers had a blast about it.

I don't want to be ethnocentric, but I always equate British people with good manners. I'm wondering if it's possible that my British coworker felt uncomfortable because he let out that 'rude' laugh instead of maintaining decorum. Or is his behavior not a British thing at all?

ONG, that's all just so BEAUTUFUL. In very happy for the 3 if you.

My son spent some time in Manchester and lived it. It is the only place in the UK he visited as he went there to stay with Australian friends.

Maybe you can shed some light onto this situation.... I have a British coworker. He's a good guy, but a bit on the stoic side. A couple of weeks ago, the heel of my boot suddenly broke as I was talking to him. I said, "I think my heel just broke," and I lifted up my shoe to see. Sure enough, It was broken. My coworker let out an abrupt chortle, and then immediately cut it short and said, "Musn't be rude." His unusual outburst of laughter made me laugh out loud. But he switched into complete stoicism and seemed to want to forget about my broken heel altogether. Meanwhile, my other coworkers had a blast about it.

 

I don't want to be ethnocentric, but I always equate British people with good manners. I'm wondering if it's possible that my British coworker felt uncomfortable because he let out that 'rude' laugh instead of maintaining decorum. Or is his behavior not a British thing at all?

Hi Jibralta!

We Brits are strange folk! When we're not apologising all the time we're normally full of very dry, very self depreciating humour and yes, we talk about the weather a lot and yes, it's always too cold or too hot or too wet or too dry! We lack the European's naturally stylish flair and most of the older generation still have a war mentality of 'waste not, want not'. We like a drink a bit too much and most people keep themselves to themselves and don't tend to blab too freely to people about how they feel or their personal problems. Oh and we set a set time for EVERYTHING! Whether it's a coffee date or just anything, we have to have a time for it, it can't be like, loosey goosey! And if you are late you have to apologise a lot, because that's really bad!

After reading your description it sounds like he just didn't want to seem rude by laughing at your misfortune. That's the thing I find stifling a bit here, we're mostly a bit uptight and have a hard time poking fun at someone unless, and this is a big unless, they are a close friend or at least a friend, that's the big one - coworkers, acquaintances, meeting anyone for the first time and things like that, you would never laugh at something a bit daft or unfortunate or basically do anything you might think would cause the least bit of potential offence! It's ridiculous but it is a generalisation, stereotype, whatever - it's there for a reason because it's mostly pretty bang on true!

It's very sweet you equate us with good manners! I would say depending on what part of Britain someone is from, but we are normally friendly and pretty polite (especially if they are from the North of England, the South of England tends to be a bit stuck up, or much less friendly than the North, guess it equates to something a bit like the American saying 'Southern hospitality').

Definitely a British thing your coworker did unless he's very strange in general and he was simply acting a bit weird! But, I would say it sounds like the typical behaviour of the lesser spotted English man ;)

PS - what do you do for a living? I'm nosey that way!

Lo x

ONG, that's all just so BEAUTUFUL. In very happy for the 3 if you.

 

My son spent some time in Manchester and lived it. It is the only place in the UK he visited as he went there to stay with Australian friends.

Hi Silverbirch!

That's so lovely, thank you.

Oh cool, I'm really glad he liked it! We have a friend there who is a session player. He plays guitar, been on some quite famous tracks actually but he lives in Manchester, there is a big grungy kind of indie music scene there, Oasis come from there so it's a hot spot for upcoming rock bands. I've only been a few times! There are rough parts and nice parts but it's got a good vibe.

Where does your son live now Silverbirch? He sounds like quite the jet sitter!

Lo x

 

It's very sweet you equate us with good manners! I would say depending on what part of Britain someone is from, but we are normally friendly and pretty polite (especially if they are from the North of England, the South of England tends to be a bit stuck up, or much less friendly than the North, guess it equates to something a bit like the American saying 'Southern hospitality').

Just curious, which part of the UK has the best accent? I meet people from other parts of the UK and they speak "better/more clear" than the locals. It has to do with the education level as well.

Hi Lolita, he lives inner city Melbourne. He has done quite a lot of travelling and lived in Berlin for about 6 months. It was when he lived in Berlin that he tripped over to Manchester.

Thank you so much for the explanation! I felt very awkward asking that question.

He's always been very formal and proper, and I was glad to hear him finally laugh. I was surprised when he abruptly REFUSED to continue laughing! Especially when I was already laughing. I figured it was a cultural thing, but it's nice to have someone actually explain it to me.

I really appreciate the dry humor, by the way.

I am an architect for a living :)

Ha! That's true in every country (the difference between the South and the North), even in Greece.

 

Just curious, which part of the UK has the best accent? I meet people from other parts of the UK and they speak "better/more clear" than the locals. It has to do with the education level as well.

Isn't that funny! I know America obviously have a North/South divide - seems the case everywhere! I think Italy has the same issue too.

I was JUST thinking today - what on earth, York is definitely a great place to go but if you have to visit one Northern City it should probably be Newcastle!

And best accent! Well! I really like the Mackem accent which is the accent of the people from a place called Sunderland! It's really chirpy and friendly, they say 'pet' and 'hinny' instead of 'hunny' and 'de' instead of 'do' - it's brill! Better more clear in my opinion is probably more to do with someones class rather than education level, although if you have more money often and not you're more educated in a traditional sense (but doesn't mean you're smarter in my opinion!) They call it Queens English. It's a standard way of speaking that has no real accent from no particular region, it was an accent taught to BBC presenters back in the day for TV - morning news, etc. A clear, formal way of speaking. People only speak like that in the UK if they come from a bit of money normally or if they've grown up in a particularly nice area. I think it's becoming more popular now to have a twang or a working class accent. I think it's becoming cool to be really posh and cool to be really rough round the edges, but the middle class middle of the range accent is really boring and isn't enjoying the same love!

Are you from the North or South of Greece?

Lo x

Thank you so much for the explanation! I felt very awkward asking that question.

 

He's always been very formal and proper, and I was glad to hear him finally laugh. I was surprised when he abruptly REFUSED to continue laughing! Especially when I was already laughing. I figured it was a cultural thing, but it's nice to have someone actually explain it to me.

 

I really appreciate the dry humor, by the way.

 

I am an architect for a living :)

What a cool job! Oh my God! I LOVE this programme called 'Grand Designs' - so fascinating, makes you want to be an architect! What style of building or era is your favourite?

And y'know, the more you say this, I think it might be a mixture of his British traits and maybe he's just a little kooky/withdrawn anyway! Dry humour! No everyone gets it ;)

Lo x

Hi Lolita, he lives inner city Melbourne. He has done quite a lot of travelling and lived in Berlin for about 6 months. It was when he lived in Berlin that he tripped over to Manchester.

I could imagine your son being very handsome Silverbirch! He sounds like a well travelled boy!

Lo x

Isn't that funny! I know America obviously have a North/South divide - seems the case everywhere! I think Italy has the same issue too.

 

They call it Queens English. It's a standard way of speaking that has no real accent from no particular region, it was an accent taught to BBC presenters back in the day for TV - morning news, etc. A clear, formal way of speaking. People only speak like that in the UK if they come from a bit of money normally or if they've grown up in a particularly nice area.

 

Are you from the North or South of Greece?

 

Lo x

Lol for the like :)

Yes, it's the same in Italy and I think the disparity there is even larger.

Thanks for the explanation. Makes sense now. :)

My father is from Central Greece(although my paternal grandma is from Warsaw, Poland), my mother is from North Greece, I was born in Athens. I spent many years as a child with my grandparents in North Greece so I do have the Northern culture more. Don't ask me about Southerners, I am prejudiced lol.

PS. Spring has finally come :) People seem to be really happy!

(but doesn't mean you're smarter in my opinion!)

I didn't make it clear enough in my post. I concur that being educated doesn't equate automatically with being intelligent. Regarding the accent, I mentioned it because in one interview I had the developers and managers used Queens English whereas the rest had the local accent.

What a cool job! Oh my God! I LOVE this programme called 'Grand Designs' - so fascinating, makes you want to be an architect! What style of building or era is your favourite?

God, I don't know how to answer that. Let me get back to you!

And y'know, the more you say this, I think it might be a mixture of his British traits and maybe he's just a little kooky/withdrawn anyway!

Probably true. I think he's naturally introverted.

Grand Designs television programmes has been popular here in Australia for years. We also get Antique Roadshow (for years). I think it is on mon-fri late afternoons.

What a beautiful story about your son's birth! Congratulations! And enjoy those precious moments.

Grand Designs television programmes has been popular here in Australia for years. We also get Antique Roadshow (for years). I think it is on mon-fri late afternoons.

We used to have a program like Grand Designs. It was called House Beautiful. It used to play on Saturday mornings and I'd watch it with my mom as we drank coffee. I've always had some interest in architecture, but programs like House Beautiful and Curb Appeal really got me thinking about it. However, after going to school and working, my idea of architecture has expanded so much. It's no longer the "normal" idea of architecture. I still love looking at beautiful home designs, though.