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Do people really change?


midnightdeirdre

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One issue I've struggled with is that I'm afraid of doing things I enjoy & love for fear of getting sick of them and not loving/enjoying them anymore. Has anyone ever REALLY changed their tastes/beliefs/preferences totally and completely? From what I've gathered, a person's taste may change, but their spirit remains the same.

 

Some examples:

 

1.) A friend in junior high (named Christie) was obsessed with the movie Clueless; I even heard that she "threw a massive spazoid!" during lunch at school when the TV series was canceled. Later, she was calling all her friends telling them, "I still like it; I'm just not, you know, as obsessed as I was."

2.) A singer once told his fans how much he loved gummy bears; the fans then sent him gummy bears by the bag, cakes, and cookies. "I can barely look at that candy now," he said.

3.) A few actresses who filmed scenes which involved them eating the same type of food for 75 takes said the same thing the singer above said.

 

Examples 2 and 3 involved food, interestingly. Thank you for reading, this was mainly a rant. However, as I stated in the first paragraph, this is an issue I still struggle with. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

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I don't think you should avoid doing things your like because you might out grow those things. For example, I LOVED Sailor Moon when I was in middle school. AS I got older I stilled like anime but I enjoyed more mature/well done anime (Death Note for example).

 

And, if you find yourself getting board with something just step anyway from it for a little while.

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when flip-flops first came out i HATED them. now i LOVE my nike flip-flops and wish i never had to wear anything else. this has happened to me with other 'fashion' items.

 

i've dated a guy that i liked a lot when we first started dating, then over the months/years realized that i really wasn't attracted to him even though he had not changed.

 

when i get new music, if i listen to it too much it kind of ruins it. i'd love to have a music library of 1000's of songs so that i never tire of listening to my faves.

 

and, yes, my beliefs have shifted dramatically .. more than once. my world has been turned around and upside-down. and i can tell you for sure that i have been changed.

 

just wait til your mid-life crisis.

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I don't think you should avoid doing things your like because you might out grow those things. For example, I LOVED Sailor Moon when I was in middle school. AS I got older I stilled like anime but I enjoyed more mature/well done anime (Death Note for example).

This is def what I've been observing; your spirit didn't change, just your preference did.

 

And, if you find yourself getting board with something just step anyway from it for a little while.

What are vacations for?

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and, yes, my beliefs have shifted dramatically .. more than once. my world has been turned around and upside-down. and i can tell you for sure that i have been changed.

Was this due to peer pressure? Lack of assertiveness?

 

just wait til your mid-life crisis.

I have a hunch you've been joking a bit with your whole post. Am I right? o_O

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when flip-flops first came out i HATED them. now i LOVE my nike flip-flops and wish i never had to wear anything else. this has happened to me with other 'fashion' items.

I once had a pair of sandals that were gorgeous, but they HURT my feet so much the first time I wore them I almost threw them out. Then, of course, they got broken in & I wore them every day that summer.

 

i've dated a guy that i liked a lot when we first started dating, then over the months/years realized that i really wasn't attracted to him even though he had not changed.

Indeed. HE didn't change, YOU did. You realized you wanted something he couldn't give you.

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Was this due to peer pressure? Lack of assertiveness?

 

I wouldn't attribute it to either of those. My observations and questions about my beliefs culminated in walking away from them and living with no fixed beliefs for about 15 years. During that time I would say I was a completely different person, given that what I had previously believed about "right" and "wrong" no longer determined my actions/thoughts/feelings. I would venture to say that I was very assertive in going 'my own way'. It would not be exaggerating for me to say that I went from one end of the spectrum to the exact opposite. Now, after having been blessed with experiences that I needed to gain understanding, I have once again shifted. Also, I am not quite as assertive and independent as I used to be, which is a dramatic change in me.

 

 

I have a hunch you've been joking a bit with your whole post. Am I right? o_O

 

Not at all. Just like ending on a light-hearted note. Even though I am quite serious about the mid-life crisis, at least for me.

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oh, and one time after years of eating fast food and then having a job where there was only 2-3 places nearby to eat at, i got sooooo sick of eating the same things that i ended up changing my whole diet and started bringing lunch and dieting and ended up losing 60lbs. this was also after i saw a decidedly unflattering picture of myself that made me ill. lol.

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I agree that taking a step away from a hobby or an activity that you love doing is a good idea. I do this though I don't think about it, It just happens, I stopped playing my guitar for a few years, just got busy with other hobbies instead, but then i gravitated back to it. I still put it down for periods of time, but i have never gotten sick of it.

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I think it's normal to have periods of time when you step back a bit from a hobby you're passionate about, or to have your tastes evolve. I can't honestly say that I've ever consciously decided to make such changes though. For example, I was obsessed with poetry in my early teen years. Outside of school, I honestly didn't have many friends or things to do with my time, and I didn't like tv, so I occupied myself with journalling and writing poetry. My life is very different now, it's a lot happier and busier, and I rarely feel like taking the time to sit quietly and write my angsty poems, but I still write in other forms, and I know it's always there for me.

 

I have so many other varied interests that kind of boomerang in and out of my life- It really just depends on what's going on in my life, how busy I am, and what I'm in the mood for. If I genuinely love something, it's unlikely I'll outgrow it or get bored of it. Even if I go years without manga or Old Hollywood or whatever else I don't have time for at this moment, I'll always come back to things that make me happy.

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  • 4 years later...

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