My Life- Thoughts and Happenings

Oh, and I got my new drivers license in the mail today - the picture was just as ghastly as I had expected. Sheesh!

I wish I could give you a big hug. ❤️

I wish I could give you a big hug. ❤️

Virtual hug received!

Thank you Sera!!

❤️❤️

Popping in for an update.

Was feeling pretty good for a while, and ended up adding more food into my repertoire- which was a big mistake. I added some mild Thai green curry to my dinner for a few nights in a row, and ended up sick as a dog for nearly two weeks! Ack. So Thai curry is a no-no.

Just starting to feel a bit better now, but very cautious. I have lost 55 lbs since the end of January- just from being sick or from the side effects of my meds. Fortunately I had all that weight to lose, and I still have a bit of cushion. So that part is okay for now.

I have medical tests lined up, and following the results, my doc intends to increase my med dose. Not looking forward to that, but maybe my body has gotten more used to it.

Work is gearing up for me - not paid, as I am on break. But I’ve already met with my bosses a few times. The executive director told me to turn in hours from work done this summer so I can be paid extra. So that was nice.

Anyhow, I’m going to be working remotely, so I am preparing lots of lessons for that.

On a different note, my son was signed up to go back to living in the fraternity. We had discussions about safety, and he said he had similar conversations with his dad. Today was the last day he could cancel, and he texted me to say that he chZmged his mind - all of his classes were moved to online, so he decided to stay at his dad’s for the year.

It will be way cheaper. His dad told him he can keep the difference in money, since it was already budgeted. My son asked me if that was okay with me too- I thought it was cheeky, but I agreed. My son wants to save up for a tiny house, apparently. Lol. But I’m okay with it. Because it means he is less likely to be exposed to COVID on a small rural farm occupied by his dad and stepmom and grandparents. So I’m glad.

Living at the fraternity with 40 other boys did not sound safe to me.

Tomorrow it is supposed to get up to 100 F. It has been so cool in my house this week due to mild weather (80) that I put on a light sweater and wool socks yesterday. I guess I won’t need those tomorrow !

Anyhow, I need to mow my lawn early tomorrow morning, and then water it.

Went to get my teeth cleaned today. I was originally scheduled for last June but was too sick at the time.

While there was some risk for me today, I am not sure how I will feel once my doc ups my chemo dose. So I went today.

The staff wore masks and clear shields. They did have one other patient at the other end of the (large) space, but we were each in partitioned bays.

They had me wait in the car when I got there, then they sent someone out to screen me. Once I got in, they had me swish some hydrogen peroxide rinse for one minute to reduce bacteria and viruses in my mouth.

Anyhow, it is important for me to have regular dental care due to the chemo side effects, so I decided to take the risk.

I really only go to medical appointments and that is it.

Forgot to say that my hair looked so bad for my drivers license picture that I decided to gamble and cut my own hair. I ordered some professional scissors and some clips and hair bands and watched a YouTube video on how to do it.

The front part looks good. The back was tricky. It ended up longer in the back but I decided not to mess with it because I would mess it up even more. When my son has errands in town, I’m hoping he will swing by and cut an inch or 2 off for me.

So I now have a COVID do it yourself haircut! Which is exactly what it is, imperfections and all. However, my chop job is a definite improvement over the crazy wild long COVID hair before, in my opinion. So I’m happy.

Mowed my front lawn very quickly this morning before the day heated up. I don’t know if it ever got up to 102 today (I think not) but it is 93 at 8 pm. So it must have been up there.

Talked with my walking partner this morning. Instead of walking, we’ve been talking on the phone every week since I got sick. She often walks her dog while she talks with me.

Did some more work today on lessons.

Texted with a coworker who was stuck with a napping granddaughter in her lap for an hour.

My new neighbors are moving in. Two women - likely a couple? They have a cute little camper parked in their carport. Anyhow, I was relieved when I saw them, and thought to myself “Oh good, normal people”. Later I was pleased to think that I subconsciously consider a female couple normal. I’ll go over and meet them soon, but I had to get inside for my friend’s phone call.

Had a meeting with my boss today. They want to reorganize my position at work - delegate duties to assistants and then train them to do what I do. Ugh. I tried to explain to them that what I do is highly specialized - a Masters degree that is peripherally related, and solid post Masters graduate coursework specific to what I do. It’s not like I can just “train” them in a few hours - they need people specifically to do what I do. Ugh. I just feel so disrespected.

However, I know my boss well enough to know that decisions have already been made. I had a little bit of say today but was pulled up short on what I thought might work. Nope - I must do it this way. However there was a small bit of compromise for me.

I asked her if this had to do with my health, but really it came out of having to deal with budget cuts. Which does not make sense to me, because I’m not leaving. I did have a part time helper last year and they couldn’t replace him, and I never complained about that. I would have shouldered that work.

My friend J told me to work very hard not to stress, as it would flare up my cancer again. And she is right about that. So I am practicing letting go. Letting my boss do whatever strange thing she envisions.

I don’t want another bad year. Last year was good. The year before was a nightmare. I don’t want to go there again!

Breathe.... breathe....

Sorry to hear about all that. Indeed, breathe. Your health comes before anything and that you're a cancer survivor is truly a sign of how strong yiou are. Please don't let anyone or anything put you at risk of going through that again. It sucks but sometimes the only thing you can do is oblige, even if you disagree completely. Or you find another job but in this climate I'd just do my best to try and do what you can for now. Try your best to destress and be positive.

Other than the work stress, I hope you're doing well.

Also,I had lesbian neighbors once and they were the best neighbors I've ever had. They were so friendly and so fun, I hope yours are the same (if they are a couple).

I think we just have to let everything go. All we can do is live the day that we’re in. ❤️

I think we just have to let everything go. All we can do is live the day that we’re in. ❤️

I respect that look at life a lot and I'm sad to say I live in the past way more than the present. #1 thing I wish I could change about myself.

Sorry to hear about all that. Indeed, breathe. Your health comes before anything and that you're a cancer survivor is truly a sign of how strong yiou are. Please don't let anyone or anything put you at risk of going through that again. It sucks but sometimes the only thing you can do is oblige, even if you disagree completely. Or you find another job but in this climate I'd just do my best to try and do what you can for now. Try your best to destress and be positive.

 

Other than the work stress, I hope you're doing well.

 

Also,I had lesbian neighbors once and they were the best neighbors I've ever had. They were so friendly and so fun, I hope yours are the same (if they are a couple).

First official day back to work. We have staff meeting this morning. However, I have a CT scan early this morning - and hopefully I’ll be done in time for the staff meeting. I told my bosses just in case. I was concerned that if I was late, I might be stuck waiting in the Zoom waiting room while the meeting is going on. So now they will look for me.

Looking forward to the year, however crazy it might be. It will be good to “see” everyone.

The CT scan today is an important one. The doc wants to see if my meds are making a difference. I did schedule a paracentesis yesterday for them to remove the extra fluid from my abdomen so they will get a better picture.

Bone scan is next week.

Good news is that they got less fluid from me, so it seems as if the fluid production is slowing down.

I met my new neighbor- just one person and her dog. So the other person was just helping her move. Anyhow, she is a physical therapist. She must work at one of the hospitals around here. Anyway, seems nice. Must be well employed to be able to pay the rent by herself - which is likely around $1,200-1,400 per month.

I think we just have to let everything go. All we can do is live the day that we’re in. ❤️

Yes indeed.

Not always easy, but a very healthy goal.

Sera- I am thinking of you today as your dad transitions. Sending strength and prayers for you and your family.

Yes indeed.

 

Not always easy, but a very healthy goal.

 

Sera- I am thinking of you today as your dad transitions. Sending strength and prayers for you and your family.

Thank you so much. It is so hard to take as he is only 74 years old.

Thank you so much. It is so hard to take as he is only 74 years old.

So young! So sorry you are going through this.

So. I got up at 5am yesterday and went in for a 7:15 am CT scan. It was a very nice and knowledgeable technologist, who said he got a good picture. We will see what the results are next week.

I had them do the paracentesis the day before, to get the fluid out of the way so they could get a good X-ray.

And then I rushed home, because it was my first day “back” to work. We had all staff Zoom meeting.

I’m not going to stress about the changes to my job. One of my coworkers came by to borrow some folding tables for a moving sale, and she will help me get things set up.

I worked a full day (at home) yesterday which included 2 lengthy meetings - one 2 hour one with all staff, and one 2 hr one with my group. Then I worked on the computer for the rest of the day. Although I took a break to try to mow my lawn. Battery needed to be charged, so instead I did the trimming and today I got the mowing done on my lunch break.

I was tired and a bit unmotivated today. Oh well. I worked hard this summer off the clock. So I don’t feel bad.

It really is beginning to feel like fall here. I just took the ac out of my window. We really never had much heat this summer so I only used the ac twice.

Had a moment of grief today. It is so difficult to be connected to my coworkers. I really need to network with them to plan the year. Email just does not cut it.

I heard that some coworkers are meeting onsite at the building with masks on (1-3 people). Others are meeting outside (works now, but not realistic when the Oregon rains start).

Just feeling very disconnected...

I was just about ready to head for bed when I heard a bit of rattling. I thought that my cat had brought in some animal so I went out to the front hall to head that off. But to my surprise, my neighbor with Alzheimer’s was at my front door. She had locked herself out. I grabbed a flashlight and we tried all of her doors but they were all locked tight.

A few doors down is a neighbor who is a retired police officer, and he mows her lawn. Do we went over there to see if he had an extra key for her. He did not, but he found a way to get into her house. He’s going to make extra keys tomorrow so we won’t have this issue again.

She was going to try to sleep in her garage overnight (dirt floor). I offered to have her stay with me if we couldn’t get the door open. But - she wanders in and out of the grocery store, and has caregivers come and go each day. Most don’t wear masks. So, I would have been putting myself at risk.

I’m so glad the neighbor found a way in!

And I forgot to say that the neighbor never rang my doorbell or knocked. She was simply trying my door, but of course it was locked. The rattling was very subtle but I’m so used to my cat bringing dead (and alive!) things in, that when I hear rattling or rustling I get right on it! Anyhow, it is a good thing I checked to see what the noise was, otherwise she might have wandered around the neighborhood or tried sleeping outside. Thankful for the resourceful neighbor!

My son got on the honor roll for spring term!

Also- I am so glad he is staying at his dads for the online schooling. He had originally decided to stay at the fraternity (think 40-50 boys) and I was so concerned. He changed his mind and cancelled that on the very last day he could cancel the contract!

I had read in the news today about cases in a U of Michigan dorm. News last week about cases at a university in North Carolina. News about cases at Michigan State University earlier this summer. And so on...

So very glad he changed his mind.

Crazy busy time at work. I’m supposed to do training tomorrow at 2 different training sessions - one for Seesaw, and the other for Google Classroom. Can’t be both places at once! So I asked my boss which one she wants me to do.

Also, I have a doc appt in the middle of the day, so I’ll have to cut short any training anyhow

Today is my oldest son’s birthday. 25 years!

Happy Birthday to him!