Zep update - back from vacation, ex is back again :/

Hi everyone! I am back from my vacation and I have some updates.

Background: Was with my boyfriend for 3 years, lived together 2.5, I moved accross the world to be with him. I found out he was cheating on me in late September, he begged and begged me to forgive him, only to dump me a week or so after I took him back (said he only wanted me back because he felt guilty). The final breakup was Oct. 30th, NC for 18 days!!

Well first off, I can say with 100% certainty it used to be a lot easier to get over heart break in the past, because when I was in Egypt with no way to contact my ex, I did SO MUCH BETTER! I had an amazing time. I felt strong, independent, and I would go hours and hours without a single thought of my ex or the breakup. My subconscious really helped me out as I dreamed of meeting someone new and being in love again, and after that dream I felt a lot better.

Does this look like a broken hearted girl?? No!!

And I return to this email from the ex (gmail filtering NOT working apparently)

M- the longer we are separated the more I think us breaking up was a huge mistake. I don't think I will ever meet anyone like you again. My heart is aching all the time

This is exactly the same kind of email he sent me in October before I took him back. And I ended up being 100x as hurt. So I'm not biting. I didn't respond to the email. I heard this song in the airport today and it describes my feelings on this email PERFECTLY!!

[video=youtube;3H21fj0hQRM] ]

Also, I've decided I need to move out of the apartment we shared together. It's too expensive for me on my own, I am barely home because I am always out trying to keep busy so its stupid to pay all this money for this fancy apartment that really just constantly reminds me of the past. So I am starting to look at new apartments tomorrow. Also, the idea of my ex not knowing my number or where I live is just awesome.

Thats my update!! Glad to be back with you lovely people!!

That is awesome! You seem to be doing just fine without him and his mix messages... You gave me a push to do the same as I have been getting the same emails or text from the ex. He says he loves me, misses me... Actions speak so much louder then words. That is the truth.. Good luck to you!

Congrats!

You did awesome and didn't take the bait. Good for you!

Thanks guys! He's sent me longer more detailed and thoughtful emails since, and saying things I wish he had said 2 months ago. But I know this relationship is broken beyond repair, and that it will be so so so much better for me to start fresh with someone new. Eventually. For now I want to focus on building up myself. I haven't been single since I was in college and I think I definitely need to develop myself as an individual before I get into another relationship, particularly since I would like to get married in the next 3 years, so I need to choose carefully next time

Zep, this is a great thread. Well done for being so strong. I'm proud of you.

I'm going to take some positivity from this thread and apply it to myself because i'm having some down days recently.

Thanks a bunch.

Limiya

Good for you! I really want to go to Egypt now!

I'm in the process of house hunting myself, looking at a few places tonight. I'm so excited about it!

Best of luck and keep it up!