"Conditional" Friendships?

I have friends who keep going hot and cold on me depending on who I am with. If it is someone they do not exactly "fancy", I am given the cold treatment and I am just so sick of it. Years of making me feel alienated has just taken its toll on me. While I love my friends with all my heart, I wish they realize that there is some kind of happiness I am seeking that none of them can provide. I have always been supportive of their partners, whether or not I approve of the person.

Any thoughts on how to handle this?

I think a certain amount of this is normal. People are drawn to people they like. While they like you, if they don't like your current, I think it's somewhat normal to see a bit less of them.

I know my friends and I are guilty of this a little. For example, one guy in my group of friends dated a beautiful Indian lady. When we would go over, she would tell us about her Indian movies and her Indian jewlery. She would put on her Indian music and want to eat Indian food (like, seriously. She wouldn't order a pizza. Ever). She was lovely and it was fascinating the first dozen times or so. But maaan... after a while you want to talk about common interests or something not involving the word "Indian" - yanno? Not that she wasn't nice or anything... there was just no "click" or common ground. We did start to invite him less. Not because he wasn't a friend and not because we didn't care... it was just painful to sit and force a conversation with someone without the click.

I think you can mention it if this is your current situation (if they don't like your current) in an "I miss you" way, but I wouldn't push it too hard. You can't force people to get together with people they aren't fond of. This is where friendships are different than relationships - there is an ebb and flow over time.