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Thread: Sometimes the dumper DOES come back..

  1. #11
    Avila
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    in a sense it's karma. you loved and adored them so much but they broke your heart and caused you pain. now they have to live with that pain and regret. that they held something precious in their hands and then they dropped it.

    i don't know if i'll ever completely get over my ex. i think he's always going to be that one ex i'll always hold a candle for... but if he came back i wouldn't 100% adore him anymore. He let me down in a big way and once that trust has crumbled it's hard to give your heart into their keeping again. It's hard to feel safe when all you're going to be listening for is the other shoe to drop.

  2. #12
    Moggs
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    Quote Originally Posted by Avila [Register to see the link]
    in a sense it's karma. you loved and adored them so much but they broke your heart and caused you pain. now they have to live with that pain and regret. that they held something precious in their hands and then they dropped it.

    i don't know if i'll ever completely get over my ex. i think he's always going to be that one ex i'll always hold a candle for... but if he came back i wouldn't 100% adore him anymore. He let me down in a big way and once that trust has crumbled it's hard to give your heart into their keeping again. It's hard to feel safe when all you're going to be listening for is the other shoe to drop.
    Im feeling exactly the same - Im 4 months on from BU and I feel now that even if my ex came back pledging adoration and love I could never feel the same way about him because of the insensitive way he ended things, and how much he hurt me.. Part of what made our relationship so special is that I trusted him completely... I dont feel I can ever trust him with my heart again and that is the saddest thing.

  3. #13
    Avila
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    Definitly. Totally agree. I think if mine came back though, it could either be a disaster or a new beginning built on a more honest foundation. who knows what life has instore?

    all i know is that this one long protracted mistake he has made, completely broke me in half. it taught me that even if you know a person extremely well, they can all of a sudden just turn into someone you don't like or understand. but after all he's done to me, all the hurt, i will always love him. but i don't think i'll ever fully trust anyone again, let alone him. it hurt so much because until he broke up with me he was extremely trustworthy... until he wasn't. sigh. such is life.

    and as far as them coming back and pledging undying love? I heard it too many times until he broke up with me. more than anything else it teaches us that their mouthes can be moving but if they're not backing it up with action than it's just best to ignore it.

  4. #14
    dasilver
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    The biggest mistake the dumper always makes is thinking that the dumpee will always be there.

  5. #15
    Avila
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    Quote Originally Posted by dasilver [Register to see the link]
    The biggest mistake the dumper always makes is thinking that the dumpee will always be there.
    exactly. he'll come slinking back at some point. he's also so used to women falling all over themselves to be with him. it's going to be hilarious when the door won't open.

  6. #16
    gtnovru
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    I'm so ready to be over him... and for him to come back. I hope I get that chance.

  7. #17
    bw92116
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    That's confusing... do you want to be over him, or do you want to be back together with him?

  8. #18
    gtnovru
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    The previous posts talked about how your ex comes back once you're over them, but by then it's too late, so you don't care. I want to be at that point, where he comes back, I don't care, and I can kick him to the curb ; )

  9. #19
    RGS
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    Im scared to let go of mine because I know this will happen, it makes it hard to move on

  10. #20
    gtnovru
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    That happening - will be a GREAT thing. Don't be scared... welcome it! Finding happiness within ourselves and WITHOUT them... and maybe even realizing they weren't right for us - that's a great place to be. That's a healthy place.

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