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Thread: Male coworker glances at me when I walk by but won't approach me

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    GesturePoke
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    Male coworker glances at me when I walk by but won't approach me

    Like the title says, I've accidentally caught him staring at me as I walk by on more than one occasion, but he doesn't come near my station as often as he used to, and the last time he did, he didn't make eye contact with me at all- just stared at his phone and left. He had a lesson to teach right after he ordered his drink (I work at the snack bar inside a gym and he's a fitness instructor), so it could have been that he was busy that day and couldn't stop to chat. And I could be over-analyzing everything, too. As I once read somewhere: If I didn't like the guy, I wouldn't have bothered trying to figure out what was going through his head, I would have quickly assumed he liked me and just been irritated.

    I have a tendency to over think this kind of thing; so that's why I came here to ask for a few more opinions. Also, even if he were attracted to me, you guys have any suggestions on how would I go about approaching this? I'm stuck at the snack bar serving customers and he's out giving lessons. About all I can do, and have done, is walk around cleaning tables and smile when he looks over.

  2. #2
    blueidealist24
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    He could be interested in you and might have got a little shy since he realized this, so that's why he might be staring at you but avoiding you at the same time.

    Is there any time when you both would be having breaks at the same time? You could talk to him then.

  3. #3
    GesturePoke
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    Quote Originally Posted by blueidealist24 [Register to see the link]
    He could be interested in you and might have got a little shy since he realized this, so that's why he might be staring at you but avoiding you at the same time.

    Is there any time when you both would be having breaks at the same time? You could talk to him then.
    Thanks, I hadn't considered that. Since he was so talkative before, I worried I did something to annoy him. I don't know enough about his schedule to know when he gets breaks between lessons, but I know for me there's no official "break time" at the snack bar. I get a break when there's are no customers coming over. And I can't leave to area to go talk with him since I'm the only one working in the evenings.

  4. #4
    In the Dark
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    You need to break the ice.

    I go quiet when I am attracted to someone.
    It's due to over thinking but at the same tie going blank.
    Stupid part of human nature.

    I imagine myself to have a list of conversation starters and good responses but that list looks like trash when I get the "I like you nerves".

  5. #5
    MikNomis
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    Maybe you can give him a Gatorade or something.

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    m8check
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    You may want to start a conversation with him about work-related. Probably he is also waiting for you to start the conversation.

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    guynextdoor
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    Dude he's an instructor, put on a pair of yoga pants and try out his class. He might give you special attention...

  8. #8
    FYI
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    Continue smiling at him,

    but start asking him some questions about the class, since he's an instructor (and if he is shy) it'll make it a lot easier for him to open up to you since he should know a lot about the subject. Men get very uneasy sometimes under the gun with conversing on the fly with a woman that they're interested in. It's intimidating because we don't always know what to say and don't want to sound dumb. So ask him about yoga or fitness, ask him about fitness advice or what his classes are like. This should be easy for him because he knows about fitness and he'll feel much more comfortable on this subject. This will help him to loosen up and hopefully give him the confidence to take things a step further. Especially if he sees that you're talking and paying attention to him. Most guys just need a little push into the right direction and they can take it from there.

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    GesturePoke
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    Thanks for the tips, guys. I guess I'll have to make the first move. I'm fairly quiet myself, and get even more shy when I'm around someone I like. But at some point, I'll muster up the courage. Definitely can't have both of not speaking.

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