Yesterday I let him know that he is commitment phobic

My situation: Last year I met this guy on a dating site, he was very charming, so I fell for him. He kept me guessing, was making plans and cancelling them, but I believed him. When I started the conversation about gf and bf, he did not want to discuss this, he just told me that was not seeing anyone. Our communication was bad: he never called me, texted me whenever he felt like. Our relations were finished when I got pregnant, we talked, I wanted to have a child, but I could not do it without his help, I told him that. He said that we were not gf and bf, that he does not jump into relationship, that it would not be fair if child was born in this situation without love, because he did not love me and in the end he said that he was talking to his ex and they were thinking to get back together, cos he loved her. I was devastated and went to have an abortion. He kept bothering me after that with booty calls, but I was not paying attention. I know I was not ready to have a baby back then. But... 8 months later he sent this text that he misses me, I had some very good events in my life so I was proud of it and I decided to check if I still mad at him. So I met him, of course I was not mad....Then everything started all over, I told myself I was gonna have fun and that is it... But here we are: he does the same thing, texts me only when he feels like, sometimes we do not see each other for weeks... I know I am very naive, but I thought he really likes me and regrets about what happened last year. So I started to read this books about commitment phobic men and he has all the symptoms plus he has more scars on his face because of his ex scratched him... I sent him link about that yesterday, he just laughed. I sent him email with wishing good luck, but I feel very bad...

He is not a commitment phobe --- he is a user. He has an ex that he uses, he has you....And he never even got to the point of saying you were gf/bf. In the future, don't go to bed w/ this type.

And who ever gives him the least amount of crap, that is who he goes to bed with.

He is not worth another thought.

I thought this time would be different, cos I have met his best friend, we had fun all three of us and his friend told him that he likes me and that the guy that I was with should not loose this chance

I thought this time would be different, cos I have met his best friend, we had fun all three of us and his friend told him that he likes me and that the guy that I was with should not loose this chance

If a guy ABANDONS you once you're pregnant with his child he should DEFINITELY lose his chance to be with you. And raising a child with love is about loving the child, not about loving their mother. He was taking the risk of you becoming pregnant by having sex with you, but is clearly not prepared to deal with the consequences. This man is a creep who wouldn't even offer to support HIS child.

This guy is bad news but my guess is that you knew that early on as he never wanted to be your bf to begin with. Why on earth did you get pregnant with his child??

You need to cut this guy off -- NOW. Commitmentphobe? Maybe, but that's not his main issue. His main issue is that he's a CREEP.

You went though a pretty serious, life-changing experience -- an abortion (one that it sounds as though you did NOT want to get) -- and this guy has the nerve to come fishing around again while he's with someone else? He's disgusting.

Enough about him, though. You need to do some soul-searching and ask yourself WHY in the world you'd set yourself up for this again. He can't hurt you, use you, treat you badly, etc. if you don't let him, and you're letting him do it again. Why? Don't you deserve better?

I would suggest kicking him in the balls the next time you see him. What a disgusting creep.

I also think that he is using you. I know it's hard, but I would change my phone number so that he couldn't find me anymore. The thought of him makes my skin crawl...