Has anyone's SO left to travel overseas for 3 or more months?

Hi all,

Just wanted to know if anyone has had a partner who has left to go travelling alone overseas for anywhere from 3 to 4 months,

and if so, how did it effect your relationship?

I'm asking because my boyfriend has left to travel to Europe for 3 months and he's travelling alone. He and his father own a very successful company and his father is retiring at the end of this year. Once his father has retired, my boy will be the companies new CEO so therefore he will not get this opportunity (3 months off work) for years (he's 29 now). I could have gone with him but there is no way I could get the time off work not to mention I couldn't afford to go for that long. I certainly wasn't going to stop him from going though, so I wished him a safe journey and give him my full support.

I was just wondering if anyone else had been through this and if so, did it effect your relationship at all? Was your partner changed by this experience? Did they come back a different person? Did they come back wishing they were still overseas or did they come back, happy to be home?

I guess my questions come from the fact that he is travelling alone. I think it would be a far different experience then if you were

travelling with other people. When you are travelling alone, you tend to connect with alot more people as you don't have anyone to share your experiences with.

Did your partner remain in regular contact with you? Did your partner start off contacting your regularly and then stop? Did your

partner break up with you when they returned?

Would love to hear others experiences with this, good or bad please.......

I was the one to leave overseas for 5-6 months. This was back in '08. We had been living together for a year by then, and were a happy couple. It was very difficult to leave, but it was something I needed to do for myself and for my work (it was a mandatory part of my PhD program to work abroad for a semester, so I left for Boston, I am from the Netherlands). I still tear up thinking of the moment I left him at the airport. But it all went well. I enjoyed my time there. We skyped daily on fixed moments if possible, I really had a great time there. Our connection became much stronger over those months, I think we then both realized that what we had was for real. When he came to pick me up (Christmas), he proposed to marry me. A few months upon returning in the Netherlands I got pregnant with our first. We got married in Sept '09 and had our first baby in Feb '10, and our second is due any time now

So, here is a very happy ending of such a story for you Hope your experience will bring you and your boyfriend closer together as well! I know it's difficult but it really isn't the end of the world, it may just be the beginning of a new, better stage in the relationship!

Btw, I was about the same age as your bf at the time, and I left for mainly work reasons. That's an important parallel, I wouldn't have gone on a long journey if it wasn't for my work. It's not vacation, or partying or WANTING to be away from the partner. It's just the opportunity that was right at that time - before settling down (and having children especially...).

That's great to hear arwen! He didn't leave to get away from me to party lol before I met him he always had dreams of travelling, its just that it took til 29 to set up his company and be financial enough to go. He wanted me to go and even had hesitations about leaving me behind but I insisted he go, that he had to take the opportunity now while he could. I didn't want him to have any regrets later. I would never stand in the way of someones dream....I just worry that he'll be a different person when he gets back and maybe he'll love Europe so much that coming home will just feel so second rate!....

I really doubt that that will happen, although I must say that of course The Old World (Europe) is pretty amazing Although I have met the greatest people and loved Boston, me and the states didn't turn out to be a great match, I was very happy to go back home (especially foodwise). Another country can be great, but another place is not a 'home' so quickly, at least not in 3 months I think. I also lived in Italy for half a year when I was a younger student, and even though I really loved Italy (so much more than I ever grew fond of Boston for instance), also here I was very happy to go back to my own room, be surrounded by my own friends again, etc. I was single then, living in a studio with no commitments anywhere... still nothing was better than home. Depends on the person maybe. Do you live together?

My bf left for 4 months to his home country last year to visit his family. I definitely know it sucks to be away from your partner for a really long time. You two can always keep in contact through email & webcam. That's mainly how me & my bf kept in contact. You COULD get long distance phone cards but it tends to be a little pricey.

To be honest, if you fully trust your partner, there should be nothing to fear. He is there for business after all.

Throughout the time he's gone, ya you'd probably feel empty inside but it all pays off when he comes back. When my bf came back, it felt like we had just met for the first time. I felt butterflies in my stomach when I saw him, something I hadn't felt in a really long time. He was the same person, if anything, he was better. I guess because you just missed the other person SO MUCH that you want to spend every second with them. And besides, 3 months isn't a very long time for him to get really 'attached' to anything that he'll still wish he was there. He'll definitely be happy to be home & be in your arms once again.

Just think of it as a small vacation, a business related vacation haha.

Did you agreed to stay monogamous during this time apart?

No we don't live together, I'm a divorcee with kids. We both decided we are happy in our separate houses until my kids are older. It was a tough divorce so my boyfriend completely understands my need for the kids to have their own space for a while. We didn't discuss being monogamous but there is an understanding that what goes on tour stays on tour. I know that sounds weird but we have an agreement that if one of us were to meet someone else that we wanted to pursue, we'd tell each other and end the relationship. Even if it was a one night stand. I know that sounds weird but I come from an awful marriage (cheating, lying) and I do not want to tie anybody down to rigorous rules. I would rather someone be with me because they love me and want to be with me, not someone who has to "try" to be monogomous and stop themselves from cheating. I hope that makes sense.

I'm going to London for 2 months for an Internship (I leave in the morning). My boyfriend of almost 4 years and I decided to go on a break since he knows I'll be meeting a lot of new people and wants us both to not feel stressed trying to keep up with communicating regularly and this way if when I return to the states if we both want to get back together we can. We'll see what happens though. I am very excited to be surrounded by British men though =P

I'm going to London for 2 months for an Internship (I leave in the morning). My boyfriend of almost 4 years and I decided to go on a break since he knows I'll be meeting a lot of new people and wants us both to not feel stressed trying to keep up with communicating regularly and this way if when I return to the states if we both want to get back together we can. We'll see what happens though. I am very excited to be surrounded by British men though =P

I think it is the best thing to do to go on a break when one of you is going traveling for a long period of time. I was in a relationship and we stayed together through a 6 month travel period that I took, and it was very taxing on me emotionally. I would not recommend staying together because you will not get the full experience if you are always thinking about your partner and worrying about him/her. Plus, you will miss out on many fun activities while you stay in and do Skype calls all the time. I wish you the best of luck, and try not to take things too seriously. If things are meant to be, then they will work out. Best of luck to you, and make sure you enjoy yourself.

My friend (who i met overseas) was away from his gf for about 8 months. I met him in one country and we ended up together in another (by chance) I struck bad times and he offered to share his room...the smallest one in the house. I accepted but on the condition it was ok with his GF. He said it was her idea (so he could save money for their contiki together and still drink beer, not quite true im sure....more likely he suggested it and she sighed ok) ANYWAY

It did not affect them in the slightest. He was like a brother to me and occasionally flirted with girls but nothing more. She called him quite often to wake him up for work and say hello (he is a trady so its was like 5am our time..god knows what time it was back in our home country)

I met her before they left for Contiki, she is a doll, now couple years later are now engaged to be married!! I could not be happier for them!

Anyway. They had been together for a few years and obviously were very stable. He wanted to travel, she would rather go shopping, so she let him do his thing and he didn't drag her along for the ride. Guess it depends on the couple in question in every case.

Jordesse. I know I'm obviously way behind on posting, seeing as thoughts it's two years ago; but found this doing a search. I read your post and have a similar situation coming up in the next two weeks. I'm 35 and dating a great gal who is 27. We click very well, and are super attracted to each other! Both of us are very independent and busy people but when we are together it's amazing! We've been dating/seeing each other for about 5 months now. She's going away to Thailand for 3 months on her own to do some touring, exploring, volunteering with animals etc. In fact her dad is joining her for about 10-14 days. She had this trip planned before we met and wanted to go 'single' b/c this is a trip of a lifetime for her to do on her own. She doesn't seem like the type to go out and fool around from what I can tell with her and our chemistry but not really sure how it'll go. I already miss her and she's not even gone! ha ha. I am unselfishly super excited for her but know it's going to be tough. I don't know if we even have the conversation about what we do from her or just tell her to have fun, will miss her, message me when she can etc. She's indicated us doing things when she returns as well. In any case would love to hear how things went for you. I really like what Arwen said as well!